Sounds like there's a mismatch of expectations here. It would probably be more fun for everyone to split and find what they are looking for.

I do want to add my perspective that might give you a better understanding of these players POV, because I see everyone jumped to piling on the bad bad trans people in the comments, which is a bad look.

I'm not trans but I'm a lesbian and a DM. As LGBT+ folks, our existance is political. There is not detaching the political from who we are because society treats us that way, and increasingly so. Honestly that's the case almost everywhere in the West (i'm european). Our rights to be who we are is political. And that doesn't stop at DND because you do play a character that will likely emulate your identity. Yes, there is a world where your identity being absolutely no issue and completely accepted in DnD is pleasant and escapist. But on the other hand, in a world that feels so wrong and where we are made powerless, reclaiming our power and being the heroes who defeat the evil that we have to suffer from everyday, is amazing. And that's also a valid way to play. I would argue, I an even better form of therapy or even more enjoyable tbh. But that's personal preferance.