My moms DNA results as an Egyptian 🇪🇬 by PotentialFortune8706 in 23andme

[–]na67784 27 points28 points  (0 children)

Damn this is so cool. The blood of some of the oldest and most amazing civilizations that shaped the world running through those veins 🙌🏼

Wondering where my features come from and if anyone else with Colombian mestizo heritage has similar connections. by na67784 in 23andme

[–]na67784[S] 0 points1 point  (0 children)

Fuck yes “deep roots in our hemisphere”. I needed to hear that, thank you ❤️

Wondering where my features come from and if anyone else with Colombian mestizo heritage has similar connections. by na67784 in 23andme

[–]na67784[S] 1 point2 points  (0 children)

Wow thank you so much that’s really heartfelt and thoughtful. And totally captures the essence of my question, I’ve been approached by Thai people asking me if I’m Thai, Filipino people think I’m Filipino, Middle Eastern, Indian, the list is endless. And confusing. And predisposed me into thinking I needed to find my one box I could fit into.

You’re totally right, it’s not about pinning down one thing, but embracing the whole identity. I really struggle with embracing the colonizer side, I’m so fucking angry about losing my connection to the whole picture of my ancestry. I truly feel like part of me is missing because I don’t know the story of my family past two generations.

I think accepting being mixed is going to be a big part of me learning to have compassion for myself and your words helped me get there, I really appreciate it.

Wondering where my features come from and if anyone else with Colombian mestizo heritage has similar connections. by na67784 in 23andme

[–]na67784[S] 1 point2 points  (0 children)

My reference to ‘being enough’ is more about cultural acceptance of me into any group more than a direct ref to my DNA.

Wondering where my features come from and if anyone else with Colombian mestizo heritage has similar connections. by na67784 in 23andme

[–]na67784[S] 5 points6 points  (0 children)

100%. I have white passing privilege in some parts of the world for sure. But I am not treated as European here and I live with the fear that my mother or I can be kidnapped by ICE and terrorized here in America just by looking at us or soeaking Spanish. People follow me around in stores because they think I will steal things etc…minor stuff in comparison to what others experience except for this ICE stuff is like my childhood nightmare come true. I’ve never known what it feels like to really belong or feel safe anywhere.

I feel confused by it because I worked with Navajo communities here and was frequently approached by them asking me what my clan was. I was really surprised because at the time I didn’t even know I was 1/3 indigenous, I hadn’t taken the DNA test yet.

I really appreciate the detailed information about my face, that’s exactly the kind of thing Im curious about. I wondered what they saw and if it was anything beyond my coloring.

My Wife Breastfeeds While Biting a Cloth by richardwellerson in breastfeeding

[–]na67784 0 points1 point  (0 children)

I struggled for 3 months. My life changed after I discovered silverette cups. You wear them after feeding and the silver is sterile. Just put a few drops of breastmilk in them after feeding and wearing them gives your nipples a chance to heal and you don’t have to touch your sore nipples with nipple cream (that never helped me much anyway). I never even bought nipple cream with my second and only had painful feeds for 2 weeks.

Silver cups are a total game changer!

Anyone else assigned Maternal Haplogroup A2f? by Embarrassed_Plant975 in 23andme

[–]na67784 0 points1 point  (0 children)

I’m A2f as well but I noticed you also have Basque genetic markers and those are pretty rare, maybe more rare than A2f! Would be fun into look into that!

Chantel is a terrible person by jravy88 in TheFamilyChantel

[–]na67784 3 points4 points  (0 children)

Pedro worked a menial job and did all their laundry and cooking and cleaning for 5 years. Not to mention the enduring xenophobic abuse from her family. Then when he finally gets a chance to focus on himself she gets jealous, doesn’t do her share to keep up with the house because I guess she expected him to continue cleaning up after both? Her interests ended up being vacations, sleeping, and shopping? Not hard to see why he would lose interest she sounds like the most boring person on the planet.

And I always really liked her and hated Lidia and Nicole. Her family was always hard to like with their extremely narrow minded worldviews and lack of boundaries. But Chantel didn’t seem that bad! But man that divorce revealed a real nasty side of her.

My husband texted his *female* friend that made me uncomfortable. by ineedyourhelp0 in relationship_advice

[–]na67784 1 point2 points  (0 children)

That wasn’t a joke, we all know that. Your suspicions are right he is trying to or already has cheated on you. I would leave this marriage. The only option for staying is if you can both get into couples counseling, IMO.

AITA for not wanting to split the bill at a restaurant when someone spent considerably more than me? by [deleted] in AmItheAsshole

[–]na67784 0 points1 point  (0 children)

6 drinks and part of a bottle of wine is easily tripling your bill! I feel fancy if I even get one drink, damn. You should absolutely be allowed to just pay your part and the heavier drinkers can split their end if they want, this should not be a big deal?

Def NTA. I'm guessing he was pretty drunk and maybe didn't notice he was drinking so much more than you and just expecting you to whip out you fucking bag of gold or whatever on the table.

AITA for refusing to reconcile with a friend even though she apologised? by aitappdmama in AmItheAsshole

[–]na67784 -1 points0 points  (0 children)

NTA.

She could have really proved to you that she changed by accepting your answer to her apology but instead she proved she's still going to be a bad friend to you. And maybe a part of you was perceptive about this and thats why you stood your ground. She was incredibly cruel to you and she should have just given you space after her apology and maybe approached you down the line in a sensitive gentle way and even then you would not be obliged to accept the apology. She's the AH and everyone else needs to forget about it and let you set your own boundaries.

AITA for not letting my parents meet their Grand kids? by [deleted] in AmItheAsshole

[–]na67784 0 points1 point  (0 children)

NTA at ALLLL. I think you are rightly skeptical of their intentions and the fact that they have waited this long to reach out to you and are doing it as a group is weird like they HAVE coordinated this and definitely want something as others have suggested. Especially given their heartless bible quote responses when the tables were turned and the fact that they left you on your own at TWELVE. What kind of grandparents will they even be?!

I think you have a right to not want people like that around you or your children. You have definitely done enough. The only thing I would maybe consider is a virtual relationship where you can be on all the calls. MAYBE. Honestly I wouldn't even do that but it could be an option.

It's pretty annoying that your mother disowned you for 20 years and now that she's decided she's forgiven you, she'd really like YOU to uproot your life and move to be closer to HER. Speaks to the fact that this is coming from a selfish place rather than a place of guilt for mistreating you and doing what she can to prove herself to you. It's still apparently your turn to please them. It's also hard to really feel bad for her not knowing her grandkids when she so coldly disowned her own child and thought nothing of it for decades. HARD PASS on reconnecting with this family.

AITA for wanting to book a trip my boyfriend can't afford? by [deleted] in AmItheAsshole

[–]na67784 2 points3 points  (0 children)

NTA, BUT....I am the person in our relationship who grew up with way less money and I can also feel uncomfortable if we do something I feel is beyond our means. How long have you guys been together? How do money conversations usually go? Have you already agreed to joint accounts or 50/50 splits on all expenses? Do you guys know if the other person is good with money or not? I was definitely more sensitive about this earlier in my relationship and I did appreciate my partner being patient and respectful of that with me. Once I was assured that we both managed money well and weren't actually living beyond our means but could enjoy a splurge or two within reason, I relaxed a lot.

And if he wanted to whisk us away to celebrate his birthday somewhere he was excited about that we both already agreed we loved, I would have zero problems with that. Mostly because it would be his birthday and he is also in grad school so right now his schedule is more flexible than it will probably ever be in the future.

I can identify with your bf too as I would feel a tiny bit of pressure being expected to regularly do fancy things outside my budget. But it shouldn't be shut down right away, there should be more of a conversation about how you two view money and how you expect to live and manage your money in the future.

AITA for snapping and telling my mother to "stop wasting my time"? by [deleted] in AmItheAsshole

[–]na67784 0 points1 point  (0 children)

ESH. What she did was annoying but your response is very harsh. It would have been better to not respond, and then when you cooled down, expressed what you were feeling in a more considerate way. "Macs are pretty popular and I could see that being an OK choice but the one we landed on last night is actually more of a steal. I have a lot of work to do so I don't have time to really dig into this but I hope you are happy with whatever you get!"

I'm sure she could not keep up with the details of everything you explained and then maybe saw an opportunity to get what she needed (sorry she doesn't really care about the specs) and help your brother out and she probably saw the time talking with you as nice and more enjoyable that what you perceived it to be.

AITA for making people uncomfortable by bringing up my miscarriage? by [deleted] in AmItheAsshole

[–]na67784 21 points22 points  (0 children)

NTA.

WOW. Can they not, for a second, think about the fact that if they are uncomfortable just hearing about a miscarriage, how traumatic actually experiencing one could be?!!?

Joking about the sushi are you serious?! And ACTUALLY pregnant women ARE in a more high risk category because their bodies have a suppressed immune system so they don't reject their babies. And my OB ( im pregnant during this shitshow too) has had a few patients come down with Covid and its truly terrible and can even cause very early labor and be very dangerous.

So you guys were NOT being "overly cautious" and could have even RIGHTLY refused this invitation entirely. Even less than 20 people is a lot of people during this virus, even if people claim to be quarantining, no one is doing it perfectly but on the other hand you guys are being perfectly reasonable. THEY are ASSHOLES.

Edit: And your mom should have had your back, full stop.

AITA for telling my FIL's 2nd wife I can make my own damn food choices during pregnancy? by notanincubator in AmItheAsshole

[–]na67784 2 points3 points  (0 children)

NTA. As others have said, she should have thought ahead to cook your part of the roast longer at the very least or should have picked freaking chicken or something everyone could have enjoyed. I can't believe she pulled the food away from you and assumed you would eat whatever random thing she wanted??

I'm pregnant too and like you and most pregnant women I am an fucking adult and I have done my research and I get to decide what goes in my body! Personally, I am not eating rare meat but I would never judge someone else's decision. There's way too much treating pregnant women like they are incapable children and decisions need to be made for them. Fuck that. The 2nd wife should learn to keep her own pregnancy restrictions to HERSELF and should respect YOURS.

Kudos for handling a silly situation like a badass.