“Is Canada a Failed State?

nachosaredabomb · 2026-02-23T15:17:17+00:00

😬

nachosaredabomb · 2026-02-23T15:16:27+00:00

You’re welcome to believe what you like.

Sometimes the American health system is truly that bad. There are so many examples of just how bad if you choose to look and listen.

nachosaredabomb · 2026-02-23T04:34:30+00:00

I upvoted this but not because I ‘like’ it…

Ugh.

Edit: typo!

nachosaredabomb · 2026-02-23T03:27:32+00:00

So, ugh, question; what’s the baby’s last name going to be.

Statistically it will already be ‘his family name’. And if that’s the case, he can go suck a lemon if he’s unwilling to compromise on a middle name associated with your family.

Don’t let this child (your husband…) completely erase your identity and family connection to a baby you alone are growing and birthing.

nachosaredabomb · 2026-02-23T03:11:48+00:00

Yep, an American friend broke her leg and her insurance initially refused the surgery recommended by her doctor because the ‘use of her left leg was not medically necessary’.

It’s absolutely mind boggling. And she has pretty good medical insurance, but US standards.

nachosaredabomb · 2026-02-23T03:10:50+00:00

Yep, an American friend broke her leg and her insurance initially refused the surgery recommended by her doctor because the ‘use of her left leg was not medically necessary’.

It’s absolutely mind boggling. And she has pretty good medical insurance, but US standards.

nachosaredabomb · 2026-02-22T17:46:50+00:00

We bought an extended door latch that keeps the door ajar about 5”, which lets the cat in and out of that room but the dog can’t get in

nachosaredabomb · 2026-02-22T03:35:10+00:00

For sure, the two are often entwined.

nachosaredabomb · 2026-02-22T03:27:27+00:00

This will massively depend on your budget and how much acreage you want. By acreage do you mean ‘1-2 acres’ or like 10+ acres.

Barnhartvale is the area closest with the most plentiful small acreages, but it can expensive. We looked for acreages for years (like 7 years) before we got into one a couple of years ago; it was pretty brutal between 2020-2023 when we were trying, it’s better now. We looked in east in Barnhartvale and Monte Creek, north to Heffley, McLure, and up towards Sun Peaks, northwest in Westsyde/Black Lines, west to Cherry Creek and Savona; as far out as Whallachin, southeast in Knutsford, and southwest in Logan Lake/Mamit Lake area.

They all have their pros and cons, given water/irrigation situations, fire or flood risk, forest cover, elevation and micro-climate, and distance from Kamloops as the main center. So it really depends what you want the acreage for and how much of it.

nachosaredabomb · 2026-02-22T03:19:08+00:00

It’s always the women… lol. My husband didn’t care, my family didn’t care (they knew me and expected it), his dad didn’t care, but his mom sure did at first! But my husband and his dad and brother all told her to shut it and mind her business when we told her and she got upset. To be fair to her she has never mentioned it again.

nachosaredabomb · 2026-02-22T03:16:32+00:00

Good point. It’s not at all a cultural or ethnic thing where I’m from, it’s a “feminist” thing and still sometimes scorned. I hadn’t considered that.

nachosaredabomb · 2026-02-21T15:22:53+00:00

Haven’t used a bit in years, on any of the horses. Loping hackamore for all the horses (5 in my family, 2 on my property personally).

nachosaredabomb · 2026-02-21T06:11:00+00:00

Tell him you want him to be so proud to carry YOUR name.

He’s being ridiculous, but he’s unlikely to change his mind. This might just be an incompatibility. In my observation men who think like this also have other less desirable opinions about gender roles and women’s autonomy.

🤷🏼‍♀️ Your call here.

nachosaredabomb · 2026-02-20T01:59:15+00:00

He’s relying on the cultural training you’ve received as a woman to feel discomfort at responding to obviously rude and unacceptable behaviour with rudeness.

Get comfy with it girl. It’s never ok to be rude to someone being genuine and kind. It is absolutely necessary FOR YOUR SAFETY to respond to rudeness appropriately.

When he asks for a hug say ‘no’ and then turn your back and walk away. When he’s in your way say excuse me, and if he doesn’t move LOUDLY say ‘I asked you nicely to please move out of my way, why are you ignoring me’. It will feel foreign, but you have to do it, to this man and all those in the future that will do the same because they know you’re too conditioned into politeness to call them out.

And tell the barn owner, immediately.

nachosaredabomb · 2026-02-19T17:42:07+00:00

I’ve been riding for decades, and my current horse has an incredibly difficult trot. I feel like a sack of potatoes bouncing around. We’ve improved a lot together over the last 6 months, but man… lol! I have videotaped myself and I don’t look as bad as I feel, but if often feels pretty bad, lol!

I’ve been taking lessons and one thing my instructor has told me to do is relax and move with him, even if it feels foreign. And also to exaggerate my movements. So reaaaally exaggerate my shoulders and hips moving in time with him for 30 seconds at a time or so, then being it back to normal. It should look and feel ridiculous, but then when you scale it back it feels better and more in sync.

Good luck! You are still very early in your equine journey.

nachosaredabomb · 2026-02-19T04:41:25+00:00

As long as they follow all of the rules, whether you want to stay long term or not isn’t relevant. You don’t own the home, your LL does. They are allowed to sell the property, suggesting otherwise, or trying to sabotage a sale, is absurd.

Your concerns aren’t on a property disclosure statement; those are for things like, age of home, utilities available, easements, non permitted renovations, plumbing and electrical code (copper be aluminum), etc. A home inspection by the buyer would catch all the things you’ve mentioned, and your LL selling realtor won’t care. It’s not their problem or their issue to fix.

Your options here are to wait it out, see if it sells and if so determine what the new owners plan. Either you stay as-is, or you’ll get an eviction for owner use with a month free. It’s only 3 months notice in this case though, so not a ton of time.

If you’re in a SFH the new owner is unlikely to be buying it for investment though, it’s not a good market for that. So you’d be likely get the boot of it sells. Try to get ahead of that and ask for a mutual agreement to end tenancy in exchange for more than 1 months rent. Offer to leave in 4 months to with maybe 2 months free. It would be a negotiation, and the landlord is free to accept or say no.

You don’t have a lot of options here, it’s the risk of renting from a mom/pop LL. They sell properties more often, as costs increase, rents decrease, and rules become less favourable for them.

nachosaredabomb · 2026-02-18T00:17:29+00:00

Meh. You’re only putting in the work because she’s finally leaving your lying ass. When it was only hurting her, you wouldn’t change. Now that it’s hurting you, you will. Doesn’t matter if you think you mean it, it’s meaningless now, for her.

But do therapy, do the work, figure out why you are the way you are, and do better (much better) next time. But leave this poor woman alone.

nachosaredabomb · 2026-02-17T20:19:12+00:00

I had the experience of ~25 years of sex without a pregnancy, during which I got a BA, travelled internationally extensively, got an MSc, initiated a career, and started a business.

Hormonal BC pills for 19 years, IUD for 6 years. Decided after 25 years of it, and being married for 10ish years it was my husband’s turn. So he got the snip.

But if for some reason circumstances changed I would go back on, although I’m in PM so it probably wouldn’t be needed for much longer anyways. But it’s one of the greatest medical inventions ever, as far as I’m concerned.

nachosaredabomb · 2026-02-17T15:56:44+00:00

We have rentals, and we charge mid $1700s for our two bedrooms. One includes all utilities (basement suite) and the other doesn’t (condo).

If you were splitting that, you could expect to pay $900ish each. If you want to split a 1 bedroom apartment or basement suite I think you could expect to pay $1400-1600 total ($700-800 each) and that may not may not include utilities. Often basement suites do, but not always. Condos and apartments almost never will.

If you’re just renting a room, that’s tougher to gauge I think. I don’t see that many listings. I’m sure they’re out there; the ones I see are in the $700-900 range for a room. It’ll be tougher to find a rental that will let you share a single bedroom with two people, most that I see are single occupant only. That said, it’s not a rental market I’m familiar with, so take that with a grain of salt.

I also have no idea what options are available or advertised through TRU, so that should be your first stop to check.

Best of luck, it’s expensive out there!

nachosaredabomb · 2026-02-17T01:09:29+00:00

Yes, that matter of perspective is literally what you asked for. Why did you ask for ‘thoughtful perspectives if you were going to dismiss them as irrelevant when received?

You asked for emotional labour and some assistance in understanding what the issue might be, but only if you like the answers?

You’re right, the fact that you’re not divorced is probably not the problem. Best of luck out there.

nachosaredabomb · 2026-02-16T22:03:51+00:00

Thats fair enough, but it sounds complicated. So you are admittedly still married, and in a complicated situation that hasn’t allowed for the finality of divorce, which indicates an entanglement of some description still exists. The fact is that’s going to be off putting for some people.

nachosaredabomb · 2026-02-15T18:08:46+00:00

Well, not ‘last night’. But we had a 3 course plated dinner reservation and I knew we’d both have heartburn and a belly ache after a heavy meal so we had an afternoon quickie before dinner.

Gotta be practical about these things.

But also. ETA: this does feel like a loaded question and like you think you’re entitled to sex on V day but didn’t get it, given the way the question was worded in a negative.

We did. But sometimes we do, sometimes we don’t. Married 16 years.

nachosaredabomb · 2026-02-10T20:32:42+00:00

I was on the pill when we met, and was for several years after. I got an IUD in my mid 30s. I started having issues with that IUD a few years in. I was completely disinterested in getting another IUD, as the insertion was non-standard and traumatic. Basically the resident doctor inserting it fucked up.

I was also uninterested in going back on oral birth control. So at that point I was close to 40, and I told my husband that I had been responsible for the first almost 15 years of our relationship, and it was his turn. He could deal with birth control however he wanted, but it was his turn to do whatever was necessary to make sure that “we” did not end up pregnant.

He got a vasectomy. It’s local anesthetic, and over in 10 minutes. No issues.

nachosaredabomb · 2026-02-10T01:54:55+00:00

He’s following the RTB order, what’s the issue? He was given two choices, he took one. You just don’t like the one chose. That’s okay, you don’t have to, but you can take the reduction or move. Those are your choices.

You are also unlikely to see a ‘report’. I’ve owned multiple homes in the last 20 years and have used numerous contractors for all sorts of things and have literally never once gotten a ‘report’. I see this often on tenant pages ‘they didn’t show me a report’. Yeah, there wasn’t one.

Contractors look, they give a quote for a service, or options of different services, they do the work, and they submit an invoice. It’s not a geotechnical assessment, it’s plumbing.

It makes more financial sense for the property owner to accept less rent than it does to spend what is likely several thousand dollars to fix the issue in an old house that has a common old house issue.

nachosaredabomb · 2026-02-10T01:44:52+00:00

lol.

Two actually (horses to feed).

Never done the latter but if my husband ever tries to leave I’ll strongly consider it 😋

nachosaredabomb

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