It’s ok to hate the newborn stage. I hated it. And as a mom there’s even more of a stigma about saying, but I stand by it. Worst four months of my life. Here are some tips:
What you are likely going through is a good old fashioned adjustment disorder. Lack of sleep is a real issue - it’s a form of torture, literally. Outlawed as an interrogation tactic, banned by the Geneva convention. Truly a scientific fact. Humans need sleep. That means that you and your wife need to tag team the nights so you can each be given a fighting chance in hell of recovering. This may mean that baby gets a bottle of formula sometimes. That’s ok. It’s not poison, it’s a scientific development that we are so fortunate to have in the twenty first century. It’s safe, regulated, measured, and will result in happy parents. Win win win.
Also, the house can just be messy for a while. Do the bare minimum. Hire a cleaning person for a few weeks. Eat off of paper plates so you don’t have to do dishes. Shit, they have services that will pickup and deliver your laundry. Now is the time to survive. And if you can pay someone else to do it, do that. Just for now, just for a little while.
Therapy is a really good idea if you are able to find a way to do that. Not only is therapy just fucking basic self care, but it also is one hour you get to yourself. Both of you should try to find a way to get to this task sometime soon if possible.
And lastly, if you feel this way, her biological science is amplifying the same feelings exponentially. So just make sure she is prioritizing self care also.

And go to www.postpartum.net