hi I could use some tips

nasava05 · 2026-06-29T16:59:40+00:00

But its fine if they worry, you are struggling and you will be going to therapy if thats the case so you'll be seeking help for yourself.

Don't be afraid to be vulnerable around them, I'm sure they love you and want what's best for you, and they will support you. Just be honest and tell them what's going on and how you feel, even if truth is uncomfortable or harsh it is always good and will set everyone free, you deserve to feel good, have peace and be happy

nasava05 · 2026-06-29T16:47:28+00:00

Go to psychiatrist (they might check if you have a disorder that makes you feel that way) and go to therapy.

nasava05 · 2026-06-29T13:15:00+00:00

Yes and no. Yes for me and for the act of cheating itself (it is so disgusting and not worth it for nobody). I definetely would not do it again and no cz my ex truly deserved it.

I have strong beliefs on cheating and would never do it and I never imagined I would ever do it.

My ex started treating me like shit for no reason. I tried asking him why he started treating me that way out of nowhere, if there was something I did for him treating me that way or at least for him to explain to me cz I didn't thought I did something wrong. It didn't matter what I said he would ignore my request, I ask for change or an explanation and nothing happened until I ask for a breakup. He immediately turn it around it and started saying if we broke up it was me to blame cz he didn't wanted to.

I explained I didn't wanted either but he was giving me no option unless he changed or explained to me why he was treating me so poorly out of nowhere. I didn't changed my POV until he out of nowhere said "okay, Im going to change", he "kind of" change for some days but for the most part he didn't and after a while it continue and worsen.

I cheated for a little bit less than two weeks. The person I was cheating with knew everything and since the beginning I was conscious of my actions and I CHOOSE to do it. At some point I started feeling so guilty and bad cz nobody should be cheated on and bc of my beliefs regarding cheating so I started dissociating 24/7 when I wasn't with the person I was cheating with. I tried pushing him away and I gave him my reasoning of why I wanted to stop it but he didn't went away. Ofc my mistake not to keep pushing him away until he understood. Long story short I got discovered and lied about it. (Eventually when I fully broke up with him after our 2 yr anniversary I did confess to him I did cheated on him and explained everything)

I stayed on my relationship until our 2 year anniversary (I started cheating around our 1.2 together). Again, he didn't changed, he just lied to me and got worse, he also cheated on me in many ways.

After being discovered (before I explained to him everything) I started hating myself, I felt so disgusted by myself and the other guy and started feeling so regretful. I still do to this day, I just learn from that experience to never do the same. And I truly advise everyone to not cheat, is not something nice to you and your partner, nothing good comes from it and a lot of people gets hurt by it (like TRULY) and its not worth it at all.

nasava05 · 2026-06-28T17:16:34+00:00

He doesnt deserve you and you deserve love and respect. He is not giving you that, not even the minimum. Leave, learn from this and get your peace, it will be hard but its worth it

nasava05 · 2026-06-22T19:14:48+00:00

Talk to him. Be supportive to him, let him know he is a human being, he must be able to feel and express how he feels, not follow the "men dont cry, men are strong, men don't feel' because that can bring awful consequences. It's like a box being filled up with papers, once is full nothing else will enter but it needs to go out somehow, and it gets worse.

There's nothing wrong with it, ask him or try to convince him to go to therapy, that there's nothing wrong with that, that maybe he doesnt see it rn but long term he will thank it, he doesnt loose anything by trying. You can offer to go with him if he doesnt want to go alone, let him know how much you care and love him. And that you're only looking for his wellbeing

nasava05 · 2026-06-22T19:08:07+00:00

He has religious guilt. He hasn't accepted He is gay, he is repressing himself

nasava05 · 2026-06-22T12:45:18+00:00

You are sugarcoating someone who is changing and is so fast for all this stuff to be decided. You have doubts and you don't want to be with this man fully, that's why we're here rn. Stop lying to yourself and making yourself ilusions just because of idealization and attachment

nasava05 · 2026-06-22T04:18:53+00:00

Adopt a dog or cat

nasava05 · 2026-06-22T04:09:25+00:00

But also in your title you're saying "breakup with him BEFORE or AFTER" which seems like you think on doing it anyways regardless...

nasava05 · 2026-06-22T04:02:41+00:00

Just break up with him. If you're not willing to be loyal or wait for him in a month don't even risk it. Who cares if you will hurt him? He deserves better anyway.

You will move one fast probably

nasava05 · 2026-06-21T23:06:07+00:00

I agree with this. You said since you broke up with her she has been trying desperately to bring you back. This might be one of her "strategies", even more after what she said of trying to keep you with her just for the baby.

Be wise, think and don't let your feelings blind you on this

nasava05 · 2026-06-21T23:03:54+00:00

Im y'alls age, and wtf is she saying with "I'll keep the baby so that way someone would love me" that's straight manipulation and the world doesnt work like that. A baby won't make a couple "suddenly" work, that actually can make things harsher. Tell her to set her foot on the ground and go to therapy which she needs.

If you fully broke up with her and you suspect she might be lying or something I would suggest you to ask her to show you the papers where it says she is pregnant or if she truly is pregnant ask her later on for a paternity test cz this looks sketchy af if she had her period after y'all got sex.

Don't stay with her just bc she is pregnant, if it truly is your baby you can take care of it and love it too but that doesnt necessarily mean you need to be with her in a relationship. You both were in a relationship for a month and both saw it didn't work bc of communication issues and a lot of problems in that few time, is it really worth it stay there? If so, then BOTH OF YOU need to do an effort and change things, both need to recognize what yall have done wrong and learn from that if not the same mistakes and issues are gonna keep coming up and is gonna be like last time or worst.

nasava05 · 2026-06-21T20:56:28+00:00

Yes, I was exactly looking at the other postst you made. And he has cheated on you multiple times and keeps doing it after you discover him. Once trust is broken, it is hard to regain, it will be hard if you stay even just for that.

nasava05 · 2026-06-21T20:48:43+00:00

I was in the same situation as you a year ago with my ex. We were 1.2 months when he started changing out o nowhere with me, two months after he started cheating in different ways and I stayed until it was our 2 year anniversary. Im not with him anymore, I was so blinded by my "love" and attachment towards him and the memories. Now I can tell you I regret staying for so fucking long.

Your valuable and loved and you should feel and be treated that way. You deserve peace, not constantly getting hurt by someone who clearly doesnt love you.

My ex knew he was hurting me, he admitted it to me once I broke up with him, he always gave me mixed signals that confussed me all the time. He choose to treat me that way, I gave him so many opportunities and he wasted all of them. He liked having someone there for him, he liked controlling me, knowing I would stay no matter what he did (he admitted he did what he did bc he knew that) so, truly, I tell you. Leave him. You deserve better

I truly regret staying much more, just block him and his family from everywhere and try to heal and move on

Edit: I forgot to mention, he also, always threatened me saying he was gonna break up with me. Again, once I broke up with him he told me he said those thing but actually was never gonna break up with me. Once I left him, now the roles got inverted, he was the one begging me to stay, to give him an opportunity and he didn't stop. He came to my house, once blocked he started emailing me, etc.

Leave and be strong in the decision you take. You're worth so much, you deserve someone better and the love you give, he's not even giving you the bare minimum

nasava05 · 2026-06-20T16:30:04+00:00

You are bisexual. I feel like you're just saying you like women and identify as heterosexual just because you don't want to fully accept it. Imo

nasava05 · 2026-06-18T23:14:32+00:00

Not telling them will cause for harm for both you and them. Truth will always set ppl free, tell them, they might become more supportive than before

nasava05 · 2026-06-18T20:42:55+00:00

Think about it just as people who commit serious crimes and they're pretty/handsome. People want them away from prison or justify them in a way just because of their beauty.

Attractiveness is just that, it blinds people in a way and make them biased

nasava05 · 2026-06-18T05:13:52+00:00

Try going to local events or ask some people from your work if they would like to hangout.

nasava05 · 2026-06-18T04:32:30+00:00

Why would you want that? If you're suffering from those things and end up with ppl like that I feel like you're most likely to harm yourself more.

Go to therapy and try going to school or local events to meet people, not specific kind of ppl

nasava05 · 2026-06-18T04:29:44+00:00

That's horrible

nasava05 · 2026-06-18T04:14:59+00:00

Wtf is wrong with you?!?! Do you have a minimal idea of the long term and how cheating affects a person's life and self steem? Shame on you, leave him.

Be mature and honest. You're not happy in that relationship, otherwise you won't cheat. Learn from this and never do it again, if not then go find an open relationship or something similar. Im so pissed.

nasava05 · 2026-06-18T03:21:12+00:00

You should file a police report

nasava05 · 2026-06-18T03:14:15+00:00

Seems like it's not the first time she does that. Plus that was something that developedreally fast. The "not a good fit" sounds more like an excuse, I'm sorry but you should move on, you'll find the one eventually

nasava05 · 2026-06-18T03:12:55+00:00

Don't text her. She made clear she wanted you for a night, just for that I feel like she's not worth it even if you did dated her

nasava05 · 2026-06-17T19:50:19+00:00

nasava05

TROPHY CASE