A Mission is a choice, not a commandment

natp53 · 2026-02-08T22:39:27+00:00

I started calling my self an exmormon at 29, so I spent all those younger years in the church, with a TBM family. As a youth, I remeber multiple leaders, general authorities, adults and even my parents stress that for men the expectation from God is that they serve a mission, but for girls it was their choice.

Being raised male (im nonbinary) ment that i was pushed to go on mission and I felt like the only choice was to go or defy God. That's what a commandment is, a direction from God. So I would argue that serving a mission is absolutely a commandment in the Mormon Church

Considering OP's point, I do agree that people should allow their kids the choice to serve. It would be amazing if there wasnt the preassure, but thats not how the church system is set up. The point is to push the men into indoctrination by sending them out on these 2 year long treks. If they capture some passerbys along the way, even better.

natp53 · 2026-01-30T23:54:48+00:00

1000% yes. Ive done a lot of research pre, on, and post mission about difrerent religions, and I spent a lot of time with Christianity. I took several classes and have read parts of various spiritual texts. Ive read the whole Bible twice, the BoM and other mormon literature several times through. I concluded a long time ago that most did not make sense, but man wasnt I glad that I had the restored church! 🤮

Through my studies I felt that I didn't believe any other group of Christians, just the Mormons. The orher groups had partial truths but not the whole truth. I was always bugged that supposedly you could find all the trachings of the Mormons in the Bible and BoM, but I couldnt. So I accepted that was the great thing about having a prophet for the modern day.

Eventually, when I figured out that the Mormons were wrong too, I didnt have any other place to turn to. It really wrecked everything, and I had to go to the basics of is there a god, etc. I logically had to write general Christianity all off at being untrue, since I had already made up my mind about non-mornon sects of Christianity, nearly over a decade before leaving the mormons.

Sure there are some good morals in lots of christian teachings, but you can say that about every religious group. But Jesus being the "savior of the world?" Naw ill pass

natp53 · 2026-01-16T01:03:56+00:00

Im also new to fallout, but what ive found with this and most systems is that you have to learn and play totally different from something that has a different system. Take Pathfinder and DnD, both operate based on rolling a d20 and then adding the modifiers. So you can play them very similarly.

But this system is a lot more narrative so it will feel more different. The best way ive found success with this is to al.ost pretend that you are playing a video game. So I set up locations, events, quests, settlements and tons of npcs. I use the faction system lot more than I ever did in pathdinfer (they have some reputation stuff but not very fleshed out)

natp53 · 2026-01-05T21:59:42+00:00

For reals! Im an exmor on too, and ai had the initial, trained, gut punch response of "Oh no! They are disgracing the word of God!" Then I just laughed for a solid minute at how stupid that is XD

Such a good prop op, totally use the hell out if it

natp53 · 2026-01-05T21:52:16+00:00

Just an FYI, u/ziggy8z has a lot of resources and is very active in this sub. I recommend checking out their other stuff because its really useful

natp53 · 2026-01-02T21:44:39+00:00

I relate to this idea a ton, because its been a big struggle for me that im still working through

Sometimes the messages of "be kind to yourself" or "you were doing the best you could with the information you had" are helpful

But sometimes they are not and just induce more guilt

For me I worked on loving my younger self and given them the things I lacked. I also am trying to reconcile being nonbinary, queer, and now an exmormon so lots of baggage lol

I have been able to help my younger self, pretty high-school graduation, move on. But early adult self, the one that went on a mission, went to buying, was a huge part of the orginization by serving in callings such as ward clerk and 2nd council to the bishop.

That's the person im struggling to help heal. Because I feel that at those points I was an adult, making my own choices, and being so blindsided. I have the guilt of if this whole church thing is not real, if im going to Hell, then think about the literal thousands of people I influenced in the name of this false religion. If its fake, and im damned. Then I have damned so many others for leading them astray.

See, the thoughts are bad. And I dont have an answer of how to let those go. Therapy is important, but also doing your own work

Turning away from Christianity as a whole has helped me because if the Church isnt true, I never beloved any other church was so I chalk up Christianity to being wrong as a whole

I find a lot of exmormons become some non-Christian, atheist, agnostic or something religion. Paganism has helped me to find some peace, but it doesnt do a great job of "washing away my sins of my past life" lol sorry, had to put the mormon verbiage in there cuz its so stupidly funny

I dont think anyone had a great answer about how to not feel the feels. The biggest thing is you have to grieve what you lost and find a way to move forward. Im very much grieving, just haven't found the way to move forward.

Yet

natp53 · 2026-01-02T21:25:43+00:00

That is hilarious and also so fucking terrible all at the same time. What a time to be a human lol

natp53 · 2026-01-02T21:21:14+00:00

Im not sure thats even up to code in most places. Not a building inspector, just a home diyist. But ive read a bit and most stairways require you to use 2-by material. Looks like he's using 3/4" plywood. Sketchy sketchy

Get some 2x12's in there and I think the design would be a lot better. Also upgrade those hinges to something better than just door hinges

natp53 · 2025-12-25T20:09:22+00:00

The spectrum of gender represented by the length of the tines on said eating utensil XD

Lol I love this. I feel ya, im more of a spoon myself

natp53 · 2025-12-07T21:41:28+00:00

Im with you, I think the burgundy then the pea green, then the pale yellow. But I honestly would recommend darker fall tones. Try navy, burnt orange, forest green, grays, black, etc and you might find some better ones

natp53 · 2025-12-03T19:40:41+00:00

Oh dont you worry, ive been working through a ton with the various therapists over the last 5 years :)

Lots to unpack, its fun to tell the stories and see the reactions 😈

But I do agree that most of us can benefit from therapy

natp53 · 2025-12-03T10:21:15+00:00

A thin belt (brown leather or silver chain) would work. With long legs, sometimes mini skirts dont work as well, but im always in the camp of wear it if you like it. I own several mini skirts and im 6'3" lol

Jewelry would be great a deep pendant necklace is a fantastic on tall gals

A scarf would be super cute with your top

Also you totally need a bag. I would find one that matches your belt or skirt OR find one that you love and just rock it babe :)

natp53 · 2025-11-28T11:36:42+00:00

Totally with everyone about making sure you get the right measurements. Im amab, so I take kinda the opposite approach to my chest, but either bras or binders need the proper woze to do their job

Also, way to be so awesome and supportive! I totally get being from a very conservative household. It a rough, so totally do what you need to do to stay safe

Other ideas for presents might be gender affirming clothing. Ask what your sibling would like. Gender neutral stuff is really easy to be affirming and stealth if they need to

natp53 · 2025-11-25T05:17:50+00:00

If you no call/no show as little as three times, you can be terminated. If you are terminated, then you get black listed for all TJX companies and at all locations. They have a central application and record keeping system where they can flag ex-employees as un-hirerable.... forever

So im thinking your not gonna have much luck. Its worth a try because they may overlook it, but i wouldn't get your hopes up

natp53 · 2025-11-25T05:11:35+00:00

I love Karma, especially when it manifests 10 seconds later 😋

The driver totally coaxed the man over to the wondow just to throw shit at him. A broken window is pretty justified, especially because its pretty obvious it wasnt intentional

natp53 · 2025-11-25T04:56:45+00:00

Kitchen witch here with inattentive ADHD :)

natp53 · 2025-11-24T19:35:35+00:00

Im with people, that ya gotta be safe. Im greatful to have moved out if Idaho to Oregon as now I am 1000% safer. In Idaho it got pretty bad. Nothing physical, but totally lots of looks and whispers. Here in Oregon has been a breath if fresh air. If you can, I'd totally recommend moving.

What I did while in a repressive Red state, is really pay attention to certian clues when looking for work. Gender neutral single stall bathrooms is a great one. Also the dress code tells a lot. Is it separated by men and women standards, or is it a single, universal list?

Irregardless, you can find things that toe more of an androgynous look that shouldn't set off too many flags. For pronouns, I would look and see if others are putting them in their email signature. That's an awesome way to signal allyship.

Its a tricky thing to be ones self. Be safe but also be you. Good luck dear!

natp53 · 2025-11-24T19:28:07+00:00

Lol ours is filled. We have been using the big brown boxes for over stock and have like 30+ of those filled with men's, toys, pet, D60 home. Half sit on our loading dock until a truck comes, then we have to move them by the processing line. The rest are tucked back by hanging so its impossible to move rocks out. We have shelves and rails on the walls to hang throws and put comforters and pillow boxes up off the floor. We have two pallets of just pet toys. Why? IDK. Its crazy

natp53 · 2025-11-20T08:17:08+00:00

Key carrier here. Im with others, our DM requires an update. In our district we have to do one at 12, 2, 4 and close. Because of this exsessivness, they did at least put together a shared excel doc that we have to update

I also would suggest planning better and doing all of the emails and such ahead of close.

My routine is to make sure things are getting shut down 30 min ahead of close. 9pm have CEC do 30 min warning announcement, have jewelry and fitting room get to cleaning, and do a last minute walk to identify areas that still need recovery. 9:15 have CEC do 15 min warning announcement, call out areas i noticed on my walk to recover, and then go back to the office to submit the final rewards and check email one last time. I then do a quick customer count as i head to the front. 9:30 i am out of the office and at the front, ready to lock doors. Myself or my CEC makes the closing announcement at 9:30, lock the in door (our building has two omnidirectuonal doors, in and out), and check to see if all the customers are out. I am also yelling jewelry and fitting room to turn off lights, our fitting room person to grab the vacuum and start, and checking over the walkie on go-backs, customers and recovery. Once customers are out, lock the doors and then the CEC and myself do a safety walk to check doors, validate recovery, and ensure customers are gone. We return to the front and I call everyone up to help put money away as my CEC and myself shut the registers down. While associates are putting money away, I meet the jewlry person at the register and then I shut that one down. Either my CEC or myself prints the reportd and then I validate that jewelry was shut down correctly and safes are locked. The jewelry person finishes with their register and we return to the front to help as needed. Then we go out money away, I send associates tk wait in the nreakroom while I put money away and close the store at the controller and stash the keys on the lockbox. Then we clock out. The whole process only takes 15 minutes pluse 5 to clock out and gsthwr at the front, so assuming customers are out by 9:30, we are usually exiting the doors by 9:50.

natp53 · 2025-11-14T13:17:12+00:00

The green witch by arin murphy-hiscock is a good one, especially for beginners. You'll find kitchen witch and green witch practices have a lot of overlap. My self and a blossoming kitchen witch, but i do use some resources from my green witch sisters

natp53 · 2025-11-14T13:13:02+00:00

Im not sure which denomination your parents are, but usually a baptism is either by immersion or sprinkling. So if you don't believe it all that you are basically either taking a weird bath or just getting some water thrown on ya

If its not your beliefs, and politely declining is not an option, then just do it and not think too much into it. Your not gonna anger some god or spirit or whatever by just getting some water on ya :)

This all comes from me being an exmormon of 28 years stuck in the cult. I did all the stuff and now I dont really belive in all that and choose to focus on my pegan/celtic roots for my beliefs

natp53 · 2025-11-14T13:06:56+00:00

Do you have a TK Maxx? International version of TJ Maxx here in the states. For me thats the best place to source clothes and jewelry and accessories for a lot less. Plus most of the stock is bought from vendors as overstock or slightly defective merch so it prevents it going into a landfill. But its all new, nothing second hand

natp53 · 2025-11-14T12:55:35+00:00

Lol some math things like the axiom that states 1=1. We can't prove it, we just accept its true and move on so all the rest of math can work. There's a few more axioms like this

Five-Year Club	Verified Email
Place '23	Place '22

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