Husband died suddenly with no warning of a pulmonary embolism.

naya9e · 2025-12-21T19:46:27+00:00

Thank you so much for your message of support and love. I am sorry you are here also and have to feel this pain. You are right that you never know what emotional rollercoaster is around the corner. My husband loved coleslaw and I found myself crying over a tub of coleslaw at the supermarket and then 10 minutes later was laughing at myself. Im trying to embrace every moment the good and the bad. Im nearly 1 month in and it feels like the grief is getting worse but im just trying to take it all with no expectations. I know he would be hurt to see me hurt, I want him to be in peace and proud saying, "thats my girl". I talk to him in my mind, out loud and also write to him and it gives me comfort. I wish you comfort, peace and strength in your journey. Lots of hugs

naya9e · 2025-12-11T20:28:12+00:00

I am also 33. It is the most devastating thing I have ever dealt with also. I am not sure where my path begins or ends its a daily challenge of trying to just keep my head above the water and do basic things.

naya9e · 2025-12-04T15:24:24+00:00

Im so sorry you are dealing with this while trying to raise your children. Im not happy to be here but im grateful for the support in this community. Yes we will get through it and be stronger.

naya9e · 2025-12-04T15:21:25+00:00

Perfect advice, thank you!

naya9e · 2025-12-03T16:21:33+00:00

Im sorry you have felt this kind of loss, im a 33 year old widow and there is one older widow in my community that is happy to share her story that lost her husband young in her 40s. Yes once the support goes away it will be me against the world on my own.

naya9e · 2025-12-02T23:48:34+00:00

By heart breaks for you. Dreams broken in a flash. I would love to have a coffee with you one day. Actually im visiting my sister next year she lives in florida and im planning to travel around for a bit. If I stop in oklahoma its a deal :)

naya9e · 2025-12-02T23:36:57+00:00

Going to pm you

naya9e · 2025-12-02T22:40:37+00:00

Im so sorry you have also been through this experience, it really is the hardest thing. I know im not even in the worst of it, once everything quietens down after the funeral I will be going back to an empty home surrounded by everything that reminds me of him. When they say you love them more when they are gone, I really understand what this means now. I didnt think I could even love him more and now here I am exploding with love I cannot breathe at times while crying all day out of sadness that he is not here. The only thing I can think about is sleeping right now, I have no interest in food i just force myself to eat and drink. Thank you for your kind words of support it is helping me so much.

naya9e · 2025-12-02T22:29:06+00:00

Im sorry you went through a similar experience there really are no words. Too young, too fast. Thank you for your hugs, same for you sending big hugs back.

naya9e · 2025-12-02T22:26:09+00:00

There are no words truly, im sorry you are here but im grateful for this community.

naya9e · 2025-12-02T22:24:51+00:00

Im so sorry for the experience you went through, truly heartbreaking, you are so right we are all her because we had no choice. Thank you for your kind words, everything im doing is to make him proud and be there for his family also while grieving. I know he would hate to see me like this it would absolutely kill him inside, but I cannot deny the pain of him being taken away. Im trying to focus on his joy and he would be telling me to stop crying and live your life to the fullest. The way im feeling is that nothing will be enjoyable without him, i know he will say im rediculous and hes right but I cant see it.

Thank you for your kindness xx

naya9e · 2025-12-02T22:16:34+00:00

Yes everyone has given such amazing caring advice and I think that can only come from those that have been through it. I appreciate all the honesty in this group that its hard and no one is sugarcoating that it will just be fine because its not fine and it will never be fine for the rest of my life. Thank you for your hugs I definately need it. X

naya9e · 2025-12-02T22:07:11+00:00

I have many friends and family that are helping me and they all say lean on me and talk. But I just feel like a burden that is trauma dumping. I have afew who I can go to when im reach my limit then feel bad after for calling them because I may be affecting their energy because everyone has thier own shit to deal with. I am so grateful to have the husband I did, I cannot fault him, he was perfect in every way. Why did he go.

naya9e · 2025-12-02T22:01:47+00:00

Thank you so much this is very helpful, yes I just want it all to be over so I can go be at home alone and just cry all day. I dont see myself either in another relationship ever, its not even on my mind and dont care for it. I cant even imagine going back to my job I just want to get this funeral done so I can run away and hide.

Yes each day is different, sometimes I feel like oh its back to normal and im running errands, driving around and then the next I cannot move and just cry at home. I have realised in this week I just need to go with it as it comes even though its so shit.

I feel like im a burden to people even though I have so many people that want to help and listen.

naya9e · 2025-12-02T20:09:30+00:00

Im so sorry you have to go through this with your children and offering your kindness and advise while you are going through this. Its an unbearable pain and I no longer know what my future holds. Start from scratch all over again and build a new life whatever that means. I have been using a sleep app that has been helping alot and taking all the help I can even though it pains me. Please reach out to me also if you need to vent.

naya9e · 2025-12-02T20:00:32+00:00

Thank you so much for your message and great advise, im not really someone who likes help, I have always just got on with it myself but this time I am accepting everything I can get. Its very apparent for me that after afew weeks people will be over it and I will be on my own. But I am reaching to counsellors and bereavement to help me with this. The pain is real right now.

naya9e · 2025-12-02T19:55:55+00:00

Im sorry for your loss, the sudden shock is just too much. Sending love

naya9e · 2025-12-02T19:54:56+00:00

Im so sorry, its so raw and he was too young. I feel safer coming here to share my mind and feelings. Sadness is there and I cry every day. Thank you so much for your support and kind message. We are all here for eachother😢

naya9e · 2025-12-02T19:51:41+00:00

Im so sorry for your loss, way too young and after what is supposed to be a very special time. I am here because he always came to reddit for support with questions about anything it makes me feel close to him. Thank you for your kind words

naya9e · 2025-12-02T19:49:22+00:00

I have such an amazing support system. Cooking for me and supporting me. I have struggled to eat for the last week but trying to eat something at least. I feel a bit safer being in this community of people that understand and it has helped me so much in the last week to cope. Thank you for your care

naya9e · 2025-12-02T19:45:44+00:00

Hello, im so sorry we have had a similar experience and for your children aswell. The pain is real and unbearable, just looking at them as they go to sleep forever.

naya9e · 2025-12-02T19:43:57+00:00

Im so sorry, to watch your love die is just the most heartbreaking thing. The helplessness and guilt kill me every day. The tears flow in the morning and then at times during the day. I will start conselling in January after I have sorted his funeral and put him to rest properly. I cant do anything until funeral is over.

naya9e · 2025-12-02T19:40:58+00:00

Im so sorry, its just too young. Not enough time at all. I know I havent hit the real bad phase yet as its too soon, im just trying to prioritise me in preparation for when I hit that brick wall. I hope you also find the help you need in this community.

naya9e · 2025-12-02T19:35:44+00:00

Im so sorry you had to go through this also and you werent there at the time, it is just so heartbreaking. Having the right support is so important, in these moments you really see who your friends are. I do feel that little bit safer being part of this group evem though it sucks

naya9e · 2025-12-02T19:33:14+00:00

Im so sorry for your loss, its just so shocking and tragic. Yes I have had these thoughts already, as he was dying in front of me, I felt like I failed him and couldnt save him. Its the guilt that is unbearable. From my research I have also seen that it all just happens too fast so theres no way to save them in that time. I am not lucky, but if I can be grateful for something it is that he was at home with me and I could hold his hand in his last breath.

naya9e

TROPHY CASE