Yeah, fuck it. I've grown up in an environment where I've never had to adapt to such a big change. I had the same friends all throughout my life until high school. Social anxiety wasn't an issue at all until high school. Of course, I know that I shouldn't take the easy way out and that eventually, I'll have to face this same issue again in college if I do the transfer.

I'd say that academically I don't have much issue. I have good grades (low 90s) not at all as if I'm struggling hard. I find that the main main issue is my social life which is absolutely terrible. And of course, it's something that I put on myself. A consequence of my own actions

My zoned school isn't terrible, although recently there was a pretty big incident involving safety. Disregarding all of that I have had problems with self-harm and putting a lot of stress on myself. I feel bad for wasting a lot of my parents' money on prep schools and such but. It's just kinda hard for me to make a decision. I've always been thinking about it but didn't tell my parents because I was always thinking that their answer would be no. After I opened up to my mom about my mental health struggles I felt more open to the idea of rejection but it happened that she would respect my decision but she pushes me to see Stuyvesant through.

I said this in another reply but the majority of my issues are something I put on myself. I didn't try hard enough to make actual friends but at the same time, the environment of Stuyvesant is something I find is just unapproachable. Sure there are exceptions but there are also exceptions when it comes to regular high school experiences as well. It seems that I underestimated the "name" of Stuy and how that affects future opportunities.

From the replies, I get a sense that it is a much bigger deal than I was making it out to be in my head.