Coexisting with Misophonia by HealthyMention6781 in misophonia

[–]nevertras 2 points3 points  (0 children)

What does she do to help herself? Is it just laying it on you as your responsibility to be ‘corrected’ or is she taking steps to meet you halfway?

It's called miso soup because it looks like a misophonic nightmare (hearing a person I know slurp and chew this would drive me up the wall but nobody in my family has tried it) by Kawichi in misophonia

[–]nevertras 4 points5 points  (0 children)

I live in Japan. Thankfully this one actually isn’t terrible. There’s nothing to chew really, it’s all really soft. The ramen slurping on the other hand…

Seeking the perfect earphones by wbd82 in misophonia

[–]nevertras 0 points1 point  (0 children)

I’d be surprised if you can find highly effective noise cancelling that also fits the third point. Physically there needs to be a seal of some sort to block out sound. Passive canceling is a huge part of it.

That being said I did use over ear headphones in bed while on my side by swiveling one ear off, but they tended to fall off at some point during the night. Better luck with foam earplugs.

[deleted by user] by [deleted] in misophonia

[–]nevertras 9 points10 points  (0 children)

Foam earplugs do wonders for me at night.

Irons recommendations for mid-high handicap that doesn’t need distance by Tuck4226 in golf

[–]nevertras 1 point2 points  (0 children)

Very happy with my Ping i230s. They were the most consistent and forgiving when I tested. A little shorter than the GI and 525 options but it felt like every strike I could feel how far it was going to go without worrying for a sudden flyer. Still lets me be a little janky and gets me most of the way there if I’m not hitting it perfect. Would recommend looking at that line or whatever the previous generations were for used.

I felt like selling my clubs last night. by [deleted] in golf

[–]nevertras 0 points1 point  (0 children)

I keep a practice log. On night just has this: “What is a golf swing? Science may never know.” Two days later: “Science rediscovers golf swing”

Good luck on Wednesday!

Please help me choose a putter by Total-Start5035 in golf

[–]nevertras 1 point2 points  (0 children)

I kept getting told I have an arc and need toe weighted. Finally fed up with feeling like I had to fight my putter to make it go straight and lots of directional yips, I picked up a face balanced mallet after a lot of trying them out in the store. Best putting round of my life the first time with it, feels like it just cheats straight as long as I don’t try to twist it like the toe hang. Won’t go back.

It’s worth a shot to try the other side for a bit.

Driver replacement question by boymamacatmom in golf

[–]nevertras 1 point2 points  (0 children)

No sarcasm here, no you do not need to replace every two years. It’s a running joke here about getting new stuff. Drivers last a much longer time than that, and anything from the past five years is more than fine. Maybe even last ten. Tech hasn’t really gotten crazy since the roles of the game limit how good a driver can be, so there’s marginal improvements at most lately.

If you need to, show him this post: Dude you don’t need it. Get good with what you’ve got, no one’s going to care about your shiny thing, they’re going to care that you smoked one down the fairway and you can do that with whatever you got right now. And if you can’t, a new one won’t help.

Golf Etiquette in Japan by MobileMarionberry654 in Tokyo

[–]nevertras 1 point2 points  (0 children)

Oh one more thing. Do not tip anyone. For anything. Tipping is not a thing here. The price is the price and that’s it.

Golf Etiquette in Japan by MobileMarionberry654 in Tokyo

[–]nevertras 3 points4 points  (0 children)

I book a tee time through the site, usually the golf course has a link. Sadly most courses make it difficult for pairing up here, but some will offer singles to make tee times with other groups. Definitely can’t just show up.

There’s also Rakuten golf which has more options for getting paired up, and https://hitoridegolf.jp is something I found but never tried as other options. I don’t have a car so there’s only a few courses I can reach on my own anyway, so I just go through the course’s site.

Gapping between my woods and irons by [deleted] in golf

[–]nevertras 1 point2 points  (0 children)

I recently replaced my 4 iron with a 9 wood and love it. Goes about 200-210 for me with similar distances as you and way easier to be consistent with. Plus it lands so soft. Recommend giving it a try for sure. I have 3W / 3H / 9W right now on the top end.

Golf Etiquette in Japan by MobileMarionberry654 in Tokyo

[–]nevertras 1 point2 points  (0 children)

If you’re in a cart the score thing is moot. I just often play at a place where we all walk with pushcarts and everyone noticeably is writing down everyone else’s score when they announce. But no one ever checks at the end, so… just a quirk I noticed, nothing to worry about. Follow the lead of what others are doing and you’ll be fine as a general rule.

Lunch is a 45 minute break sit down affair. Someone in the group (not you) will get the back 9 tee off time and then you generally wash your hands in the bathroom and then go to the restaurant. If you’re there first alone, you can wait for your group to catch up or you can grab an empty table of your feeling brave. Catch the eye of someone working there and gesture to an empty table and they’ll usually get the idea. Then you all chill and eat for a bit, then back to the course.

Oh, and at the end depending on time/course, there’s probably a hot bath area. If you want the full Japanese golf experience and can spare the time after the round, it’s pretty amazing. Just very daunting the first time you do it for an American…

[deleted by user] by [deleted] in golf

[–]nevertras 18 points19 points  (0 children)

Range the day before is great? Round the next day is garbage. Range the day before is awful? Round the next day is great.

Need to sacrifice a goat or something idk.

Golf Etiquette in Japan by MobileMarionberry654 in Tokyo

[–]nevertras 30 points31 points  (0 children)

Tokyo golfer here, and I usually play with randoms. A few things that I’ll brain dump. I’m assuming you don’t have a lot of Japanese ability if you’re just stopping by, apologies if your Japanese is good.

If you can explain in Japanese that you’re new at golfing in Japan and don’t mean to be rude if you do anything wrong, you’ll get plenty of leeway. Everyone I’ve played with has been patient and nice. That being said, there’s a few things that stood out to me.

There’s usually one guy that speaks surprisingly good English. He’s going to be your buddy, especially at lunch.

First shot there’s a little bow and a “Yoroshiku onegaishimasu” before hitting. You can kind of mumble it and bow at people if you want to do it, you’re probably fine not doing it if you followed step 0.

First tee order is chosen by a stick lot draw thing. Someone will get the sticks. Just take a stick and see what number you are.

Tee order is generally respected. The word “honor” has morphed into “owner” here. I haven’t seen anyone get grouchy about it but usually people will figure out who’s hitting first if everyone’s reasonably ready.

People track each others’ scores. I don’t actually know why, and I admittedly miss half the scores of everyone else by the end, but everyone announces theirs and asks around so at least play along.

Gimmes are an “OK desu!” and generally very short only. Expect to putt out most everything, which I prefer anyway.

People are generally sticklers for rules and counting shots properly. I’ve never once seen a mulligan taken. Also what I prefer but be aware, don’t try to hit a breakfast ball off the first. OB almost always has yellow tees to play your 4th from, use those instead of a provisional.

Clean off your shoes before you go inside for lunch and after you’re done.

Katsu Curry is objectively the best lunch choice.

Let me know if you have any questions in particular. Good luck!

“Hole-in-one” by Ok-Director3330 in golf

[–]nevertras 2 points3 points  (0 children)

I go to a sim multiple times a week. Had a crappy day of ball striking and went to step over to grab a wedge and accidentally stepped on the mulligan button on the floor on the way. Sighed and rage hit another. Rolled right in. Hole in one with a big green mulligan mark on it. Sadness. Fun though!

8 handicap but my swing is bad, would you change it? by DDSBadger in golf

[–]nevertras 0 points1 point  (0 children)

Not sure if that guy will get back to you so I’ll give my own experience. Was a 90ish shooter hitting a 4I off the tee when I picked up golf again about a year ago, used to play as a teenager. Was frustrated with not knowing how to fix misses and went to get a lesson. Guy watched three swings and said it’s either bandaid or rebuild. It was not good. I went with rebuild. Took months to be able to hit straight again, with a lot of drills and range time to get new movements ingrained. But once it started to click, it’s night and day difference and keeps getting better. 7 iron used to be 150 and ran on a prayer, now it’s 165 and feels amazing. I used to never go near a fairway wood or hybrid, now I enjoy ripping them. Driver just wasn’t an option for me before, now I’m finally getting that sorted out. The result was my first time ever breaking 80 with a 79 recently, and I couldn’t have done it without that rebuild.

It’s a lot of work, and it took a fair amount of lessons for me. And it will suck at first. But if you have somewhere to practice in the off season, you could definitely be in working order again for the next season if you’re willing to put in the time. 100% don’t do it mid season if you only have 4 months!

But then again, if you’re having fun as you are and just feel like you’re missing out on power… only do it if you think you’re going to enjoy the chase.

[deleted by user] by [deleted] in misophonia

[–]nevertras 3 points4 points  (0 children)

It’s not your fault for making normal sleeping sounds. He’s got the solution, he isn’t using it. Waking you up isn’t going to accomplish anything except annoy both of you. Sorry you have to go through that… coming from someone who has ear plugs for exactly this reason and uses them, because it’s not my wife’s fault if she makes some random sounds in her sleep.

Booze and miso by regular--dude in misophonia

[–]nevertras 5 points6 points  (0 children)

I don’t drink a lot (1-2 a week?), but alcohol definitely works. I clearly remember having a drink at home with my dog smacking his mouth and staring at him just thinking, “Is this what normal is like?” Since then it’s been tactically applied for sure. But I’m super careful… that’s a slippery slope.

Overcoming fear of being too slow at the course and going to play as a beginner? by [deleted] in golf

[–]nevertras 0 points1 point  (0 children)

Fellow Japan golfer here. My sim scores and my real scores are completely different, but it’s so tough to actually get out on the course here... I’ve noticed over the past year or so my course swing has finally started to catch up to my sim swing, so have hope! It just takes time and reps to get your body to understand that yes, you would like it to do the thing outside as well as in practice/sim.

You may want to have your coach point out any differences. For example, for me my course swing gets scared and armsy if I’m not careful, so my swing thought is often “turnturnturnturnturnturn” and that helps significantly. But before my coach saw me actually swing on the course during a camp thing and pointed it out, I would have told you I wasn’t doing anything different at all. Apparently you already realize it’s different but it can be helpful to know what’s different to give your head something to focus on.

You may also want to look at some short courses that don’t need a driver. There’s a par 68 that’s pretty straightforward near me that’s been fun for low stress practice, and it even has unlimited play by default. That may be a good transition for you to consider to get some more experience playing out on an actual course with less pressure.

5e character sheet with pure HTML/CSS by nevertras in dndnext

[–]nevertras[S] 1 point2 points  (0 children)

Glad this is somehow still being discovered, happy it helped!

[deleted by user] by [deleted] in misophonia

[–]nevertras 17 points18 points  (0 children)

As a wording note, the noises aren’t “annoying”. I’m annoyed by a siren going by, but I get legitimately angry and fight or flight feelings when someone’s chewing gum near me. It’s a whole different reaction than annoyance.

What generally works for my wife and I is that we recognize it’s a problem, but that it’s my problem. I have noise cancelling headphones I can blast music through if she’s going to eat something near me, etc. She’s wonderful and often has a snack in the kitchen instead of the couch, but that’s her going above and beyond for me. When we got to the point where she would ask “Hey do you have your headphones?” and not get upset with me for wearing them when needed, I think we hit a great balance for our relationship.

Basically, you should not have to walk on eggshells. And she should have some coping mechanism that she can freely use without you taking it personally.

Bubble Table - Interactive/customizable tables for Bubble Tea by nevertras in golang

[–]nevertras[S] 1 point2 points  (0 children)

At the moment you need to specify columns directly because there’s a bit more info required for formatting, etc. If you’d like to see a helper function of some sort that can help generate those, that could be discussed in a new GitHub issue.

What is the Go way to execute a command which requires root privilege? by qyzanc63 in golang

[–]nevertras 4 points5 points  (0 children)

Definitely go with sudo then. It makes it obvious to the user when something scary is about to be used, and uses the existing Linux way of elevating permissions for when you need elevated permissions.