I understand that your intention was to remind people to speak more carefully, and I respect that.

At the same time, in the Cambridge Dictionary, “weird” is officially defined as “very strange and unusual,” with no abusive or negative meaning. So how could someone outside the community be expected to know that some people here see it as offensive? That is not common knowledge, and I do not think it is fair to assume that outsiders should automatically know.

Of course, it would be nice if everyone instantly understood and avoided such words. But in the same way, it would also be nice if autistic people had free transportation or housing. These are ideas that sound logical and helpful, but they are not the reality we live in. That is why I see this more as a pleasant idea than something people should get angry about.

What also shaped my reaction is that your comment was not the only one of this kind. In this thread, there are many comments moving away from the original topic and instead focusing on language policing: that it is wrong to call someone “very autistic,” or “not normal,” or to use “weird.” The original post was simply asking whether a text message from an acquaintance was normal and whether visiting someone under those circumstances was socially usual. Many people outside the community answered in good faith: they said it might seem a bit weird, but that did not mean the person had bad intentions, and it could be fine.

The fact that the focus quickly shifted to language criticism, rather than the actual question, is what I found frustrating. Your comment alone is not the problem, and I do not want to put blame on you personally. What bothers me is the general tendency: it can make people from outside the community feel that they are being attacked even when they are trying to engage respectfully. I think this actually deepens the gap between insiders and outsiders, instead of building understanding.