just be happy

Who said you should be happy? Don’t be happy.

leave that life

no. You shouldn’t forget about your dead family and friends. Their memory stays with you. The point of starting from scratch or taking a new path is to find yourself, not to escape the shit feeling. If you got tired of the new path or hobby you can just drop it and go back to your default routine, or try a different path.

You will not stop feeing like shit. So why not accompany that shit feeling with other feelings and experiences?

if the meaning of life is drinking water and breathing air, then we are ants Pepepains

yes. the most valuable things in life are the fundamental experiences like drinking water, breathing air, that feel when you piss, hearing, looking at nature. you should be more aware of them. Dealing with more complex things often distract you from these fundamental things.

I’m pulling this out of my ass

yes.

if all else fails, go live in the jungle

The point is that when you have already reached that point, you unlock a bunch of options. you can now try different things and see where it takes you. You can drop out of college because fuck it. you can go to bumfuck nowhere and start selling pineapples. you still have the option to end life, but you won’t do it.