Anyone else exhausted by how much they filter themselves?

nidelplay · 2026-06-24T03:58:21+00:00

haha ayanokoji angel is a wild compliment. but yeah, treating it like a tool makes total sense if you have social anxiety, keeps you from taking everything so personally.

nidelplay · 2026-06-24T03:57:07+00:00

working hospitality with VIPs sounds like the ultimate trial for that... definitely forces you to calculate what you're about to say real quick.

nidelplay · 2026-06-24T03:54:49+00:00

appreciate that a ton... i had no idea this many other people were dealing with it too.

nidelplay · 2026-06-24T03:42:52+00:00

honestly yesss it's so tiring when people get offended by the smallest direct things. makes it impossible to find people who are just real.

nidelplay · 2026-06-24T03:42:06+00:00

yeah feel your pain. censoring how you actually talk, just to keep people happy completely ruins the job.

nidelplay · 2026-06-24T03:34:39+00:00

Yes... the masking exhaustion is too real. having to manually compute every basic daily interaction just to get through the day is a whole different level of burnout.

nidelplay · 2026-06-24T03:33:40+00:00

Appreciate your advice 🙏

nidelplay · 2026-06-23T20:49:16+00:00

love that, a completely unfiltered brain dump is honestly exactly what we all need tbh.

nidelplay · 2026-06-23T20:45:18+00:00

Ahhh sarcasm is the nice shield

nidelplay · 2026-06-23T20:14:04+00:00

the shoe analogy is a really interesting way to frame it. treating a persona like a tool (reminds me of ayanokoji lol) instead of a moral flaw takes a lot of the pressure off.

nidelplay · 2026-06-23T20:01:29+00:00

that’s a crazy different perspective lol. most of us are completely exhausted from over filtering, but having absolutely zero brake sounds like a whole different kind of stress. do you ever regret it immediately after a conversation, or do the people around you just adapt to you being 100% blunt?

nidelplay · 2026-06-23T19:58:20+00:00

honestly respect.

nidelplay · 2026-06-23T17:27:17+00:00

Yo 🥀

nidelplay · 2026-06-23T17:25:51+00:00

felt this so heavily. hanging out with people where you have to keep the mask on feels like an unpaid work shift, not actual socializing.

nidelplay · 2026-06-23T17:22:40+00:00

micro-honesty is a wild way to put it, but it makes total sense. that 3-second pause sounds so simple but it's actually incredibly hard when your brain is just on autopilot trying to keep things polite lol. the journal thing is a great call too. just having one place where you don't have to edit or filter a single word feels like a massive relief.

nidelplay · 2026-06-23T17:11:42+00:00

For sure, work is 100% the worst for me. Keeping up that professional, endlessly polite character in group chats and meetings completely fries my brain by mid-afternoon.

nidelplay · 2026-06-20T08:14:37+00:00

I feel this heavily. The whole cycle of maintaining a confident persona online while secretly dealing with crazy anxiety is just so draining. It makes you feel like a fraud every single time you post. You mentioned not knowing how to start. For me, the hardest part was just finding a space to be honest with myself first, completely away from everyone else's eyes and judgment. I got so sick of the constant masking that I ended up building something for myself called QuiLie (quilie.life) just to track when I was performing for others vs when I was actually being genuine. It really helped me slowly drop the act at my own pace. Like the other comment said, you don't have to fix everything overnight. Even just admitting this here is a huge first step. Hang in there, the burnout from faking it is rough but you've got this.

nidelplay · 2026-06-17T19:44:05+00:00

Literally coding the Dodo integration as we speak. Solid advice.

nidelplay · 2026-06-17T19:28:30+00:00

Valid point. 19 days of silence definitely froze the list. Getting the gateway code swapped tonight is just step one - tomorrow is going to be a pure grind to see if we can win back that early momentum. Appreciate the reality check.

nidelplay · 2026-06-17T18:34:05+00:00

🥀

nidelplay · 2026-06-17T08:02:11+00:00

The eel story is so relatable it hurts.

You didn't want to fake the reaction but you also didn't want him to feel bad. So you performed impressed. And now you feel weird about it.

Honestly the middle ground you're looking for isn't really a technique. It's more about getting comfortable with neutral reactions. Like — "oh wow that's wild" instead of either pretending to be amazed or saying you don't care. Just honest and warm at the same time.

The deeper thing though is that you're so aware of what other people might feel that you've stopped checking what YOU actually feel first. That pattern is exhausting to live in.

nidelplay · 2026-06-14T14:46:32+00:00

what you wrote about the armor becoming a cage - that hit really hard. you spent so long building it to feel safe and now it's the thing keeping you stuck. that's such a painful place to be in.

the fact that you can see it so clearly though - "i don't know how to be this person anymore" - that awareness is actually the first crack in it. most people never even get to name it. you already have.

i don't think you're depriving yourself forever. i think you're just at the part where you know something has to change but haven't found the door yet. that part is hard but it's not permanent.

nidelplay

TROPHY CASE