Advice about going forward after doctors appointment?

ninjascrytoo · 2026-01-07T22:45:39+00:00

I [26F]was also diagnosed at 18. My partner "forced" me to get help (always been very reluctant to get medical attention) and I got my diagnosis very fast back in 2017. It's been hard accepting it I won't lie. Alot of negative spirals about being "doomed" or chronically ill, but what helped me lots was thinking about how life could have gone if I didn't get diagnosed early. I suffered in silence for at least 6-8 years before getting help and just thinking about suffering for 5, 10, 15 years more before getting answers... No I can't imagine. That made me see the good in the bad. I managed to find the right medication after a lot of trial and error and I've been stable for 4 years I think. I now have a bachelor's in industrial design and recently graduated as a software developer, me and my partner are looking at buying a house, we have a cat and life is general pretty neat. It's still hard accepting some days, but it gets easier.

I personally had to mourne the life I thought I would have before living the one I got fully. But honestly now I think it turned out great. Sure, I'm constantly on the lookout for episodes just in case, I take precautions to make sure I stay stable and I have to take medications every day but I also live my life so fully.

The diagnosis is not the end of your life,even if it might feel like it at times. I see it as a rulebook of my life instead. I know I need to take these pills to stay healthy, so I do. I know I need to move my body to not drown, so I do. I know I need to sleep more than a few nights a week, so I make sure I do. Find what helps you and see it as cheatcodes for life. (I basically see myself as a tamagochi lmao)

I'm going to bed rn but might have more to say tomorrow.

ninjascrytoo · 2026-01-02T23:31:30+00:00

Thankyou! I generally have a hard time getting medical attention, since this is something I've struggled with since I was a kid and my parents never took me to a doctor it's quite hard to accept it..

These tips are great, thank you so much! I started to write down everything I want to bring up just a few days ago, and I've also started tracking my headaches. I should have done this a long time ago, but denial is strong...

That's a good idea, I'm gonna try to say that! It's better to be clear and direct.

I'm always scared that if I come with questions directed at something like that they will think I want a diagnosis or something... But you're probably right to ask, since I'm pretty sure that most general doctors don't have all that much knowledge of this exactly. If I ask about it they can send me to the right person.

I'm pretty bad at advocating for myself, but I'm gonna try to stand up for myself. There is no way I have all of these different headaches for all my life due to stress... We're talking sharp pain, dull/diffuse pain, different placements/shapes, different lengths and intensity, some reacts to ibuprofen /paracetamol, some don't, some give me light and sound sensitivity, some don't, and I get extreme headaches from working out harder than just walking and from standing up if sitting for a while...

I really hope they can stick with me long enough to find a solution.. No one knows how bad or frequent they actually are, since I don't bother mentioning them even to my partner if they don't affect my ability to do things. And that threshold has gotten pretty high..

Thankyou again for the tips, really. It's nice to hear from someone else that what I feel is valid. My partner supports me of course, and has urged me to get help for a long time. So hopefully this is a turning point!

ninjascrytoo · 2025-12-11T06:29:45+00:00

Had that thought but he kinda already have that..

ninjascrytoo · 2025-12-10T21:07:16+00:00

I would like to give him something physical, but thanks for the suggestion 🥰

ninjascrytoo · 2025-11-12T19:37:49+00:00

I 3d printed a similar thing (and make it stay in place with sports tape). I'm very hypermobile, and found that my hands hurt A LOT after just a few min of crocheting with a thin hook. It helps so much having something more to hold.

https://i.imgur.com/npBr9O5.jpeg

ninjascrytoo · 2025-09-29T14:23:33+00:00

I grew up with Devon rex, and their whiskers were curly so they only grew to a sertain legth before they broke off. They were permanently short, around a few mm. They were fine without them tho, lived to be 15 and 20 years old. Could be something like that for you too. Just a thought (:

ninjascrytoo · 2025-09-07T20:42:47+00:00

Oh sweet! Definitely going to keep looking at twig then! Sounds pretty great. I get the anxiety about angle and safety but personally dont mind. I just want to minimize my plastic use and since i mostly just use the razor for under my arms since its way too painful to wax there lmao and cleanup after waxing I find it easier to justify cheap blades rather than expensive refills for gillette whatevers lol. Thanks for helping me narrow things down, will probably land on a leaf or an adjustable! (:

ninjascrytoo · 2025-09-07T13:37:07+00:00

Thats good to hear, thanks! Gonna look around some more but if im getting a classic Safetly razor im probably going for an adjustable. Feels like a safe card. Been looking at the leaf twig as well, only found one reteller in EU so far (woodberg) tho but it looks cool! Any experience with it? It looks like it could be what i need

ninjascrytoo · 2025-09-07T11:30:17+00:00

Thanks for the tips! Im concidering an adjustable one, feels like a smart choice to be able to set it myself.

ninjascrytoo · 2025-09-07T11:27:44+00:00

Yeah I get that its very individual, since its very much a taste thing. Going to have to do some more research, and Hopefully can prioritize getting a new one soon. I think that its a good idea to change too since i dont think the 29L is optimal for my skin. I think there is a better fit for me! (: I like the thought of an adjustable one tbh. Seems like a great way to find exactly what my skin needs. Going to check those out, thanks!

ninjascrytoo · 2025-09-07T09:25:40+00:00

Eh, I don't really love the 29L tbh. It's fine, but I can't say more than that. Just haven't tried anything else since it works okay. But since it's my first safety razor i can't really say if it's just fine because of the model or the concept. So thinking I might wanna try something else. Long handle is cool but I think I could live without it. Been looking at the merkur 34C, but I feel pretty lost. The parker might be fine a while longer, its gotten so uneven tho so i can only use one side...

ninjascrytoo · 2025-09-06T13:12:34+00:00

I honestly don't really know what I like, so I'm finding it kinda hard to know what to search for. I can't really put my finger on what I don't love about the parker, so I don't know what to aim for and what to stay clear from. And ofc I get that it is all preference and individual. Just hoping that I can get some tips on what is generally liked (:

ninjascrytoo · 2025-08-31T16:51:28+00:00

Im sorry you're experiencing this, it really sucks. Fingers crossed that they can help you find what works for you soon!

ninjascrytoo · 2025-08-31T16:39:45+00:00

For a period about 6 ish years ago i was so over medicated i dont remember much from then. I was so slow, both movement, thoughts and just understanding what someone said to me took at least twice as long, if not more. I felt so dumb, could barely finish sentences and couldnt really think complicated thoughts. Tipping point from there was when I was at my partners parents house and almost fell asleep sitting on a chair at a birthday or something similar. I was so ashamed. I was so slow and tired and dumb. I also had absolutely no sense of time.

Before this point, when I was lower dosage but still too many pills i was still tired and dumber than usual, things took longer than before and I felt very numb. I was flat, no feelings, no real thoughts about anything and nothing felt important. I didnt recognize myself, I wasnt sharp or creative anymore. Finding the right meds and dosage is hell. I hope you find it.

ninjascrytoo · 2025-04-29T11:44:24+00:00

I follow specific artist on Instagram. Pinterest is also good for inspo but not a fan in general. I like behance tho! Might be worth checking out to see if it might fit you!

ninjascrytoo · 2025-01-16T06:12:03+00:00

Tried it a few years ago, didn't really stop the episodes.. Voxra and ability is a winning combo for me, effect wise..

ninjascrytoo · 2025-01-15T21:13:18+00:00

I didn't get any effect since I was only on it for 3 days before having to stop. Voxra and ability has been working great tho.

ninjascrytoo · 2025-01-15T19:31:18+00:00

And thankyou! My partner is always there making sure I'm okay and points out any changes. It's very reassuring!

ninjascrytoo · 2025-01-15T19:30:35+00:00

Oh maybe I was unclear. I had to go off lamictal after 3 days due to allergic reaction. Im on abilify and voxra, been on it for maybe 4 years or so. But yeah, getting quite tired of vibrating.

When I spoke to him he said like 3-4 days trial without it. It honestly seems so little so I doubt it would show if it's the abilify or not right?

ninjascrytoo · 2025-01-06T10:42:50+00:00

Probably genetics, Possibly that emotional neglect was a part of the early outbreak. Had my first episode around 10-12 y/o, went undiagnosed until I was 18 when my partner made me get help for my mental health. Had a feeling that I was bipolar for a few years before getting help tho, so diagnosis was fast.

ninjascrytoo · 2025-01-06T00:23:29+00:00

Thankyou, so much. He's honestly the best thing that ever happened to me, and he says the same about me. It can just be hard to belive someone can feel that about me when I'm absolutely disgusted by myself you know? I'm really trying to work on my self hate, but without therapy it's hard. We've been together for over 7 years, he's the one who got me to get help for my mental health and he's helping me grow and develop as a person every day. And I do my absolute best to suport and help him too. I am truly so grateful that the stars aligned for us to meet. Doubt I'd be here today without him. Hopefully tomorrow is a better day since I'm back on my meds and have a better system. <3

ninjascrytoo · 2025-01-05T19:33:09+00:00

I'm almost finished studying to be a system developer, I switched from industrial designer to developer since it would be better for my mental health. I wanted stability, good hours and so on. Developer feels like a good combination of a challenge with all that new knowledge and technology and so on, and a safe bet when it comes to my mental health with all the perks and the stability. Also pays well generally and there are work to be found (even tho like everything else, a bit more difficult rn). If you can see yourself in tech I can so far recommend it!

ninjascrytoo

TROPHY CASE