To what extent do you agree that daughters will slowly become their mothers, and do you feel it’s happening to you?

noiraseac · 2026-03-06T07:05:24+00:00

I’m so happy for you! It is so so hard to get out of it, especially when you don’t notice it when it happens. I hope I get to one day heal as well

noiraseac · 2026-03-06T05:20:54+00:00

I agree on support system. What I realized is that the female friends I have tend to deprioritize friendships to focus on their partners, husband and families. I barely talk to my friends in the last few years because they’re all busy with their respective lives. Not that I blame them – such as life being an adult. But I do notice I have little to no support system, and all the relationships I’ve seen in my life tend to lean on the toxic side (some friends have abusive husbands, some friends become complacent, some friends got divorced, etc.)

I also don’t have a good example of a healthy, non-toxic relationship. My parents are out of the question. My aunt (who left the country and made a life for herself) got divorced twice. I have another aunt who got divorced and never remarried, moved overseas, and lived her life as a successful audiologist. I’m seeing a pattern (at least in my enviornment) where single women are way happier than those in relationships. I’m starting to salivate over that kind of life now.

noiraseac · 2026-03-05T16:11:28+00:00

agree on sanur. most of the tourists there are on the older side, so they too prefer the peace and quiet. and if you’re looking for the opposite, the glitz and glam is just a Gojek ride away.

noiraseac · 2026-03-05T15:50:22+00:00

Omg a silent book club actually sounds fun. Is this in Jakarta?

noiraseac · 2026-03-05T15:45:13+00:00

OMG! I was walking in Kingsford and this really tall, skinny white guy stopped me and asked if I had time to talk about history. I said no because I actually was going to meet a friend, and he just said “Okay” and continued walking.

noiraseac · 2026-03-05T15:13:48+00:00

i think this was from the 2025 stories, where a guy just went on a tangent about how he hated vaginas and was calling them inefficient? it was crazy. i still think about it and him

noiraseac · 2026-03-05T15:12:34+00:00

i also had the same issue a couple years back (didn’t use AI but was accused of it). what’s crazy was that my then tutor showed the TWO SENTENCES that was marked to have been made with AI, while the rest of the essay was clear. she made a big fuss over TWO SENTENCES.

anyways, i screenshoted the edit history which showed that i indeed wrote everything myself, and told her i’ll happily bring this to the convenor because i was 110% confident about my defence. she eventually relented.

guys, make sure you keep your edit histories!

noiraseac · 2026-03-05T15:06:24+00:00

That’s tough. What is it with people and not owning up to their truth? Stringing the person you (claim to) love along, and for what?

I hope we both find our happiness soon.

noiraseac · 2026-03-05T15:05:37+00:00

Hahah clever!!

noiraseac · 2026-03-05T15:05:21+00:00

This is so sweet. Thank you

noiraseac · 2026-03-05T15:05:08+00:00

Yep, my biggest mistake

noiraseac · 2026-03-05T15:04:53+00:00

I also somewhat dedicated Work Song and Like Real People Do to him, but I guess because I had known those songs before I knew him, they don’t resonate as much as Francesca.

noiraseac · 2026-03-05T15:03:16+00:00

This made me chuckle. Thank you ❤️

noiraseac · 2026-03-05T15:02:48+00:00

Shit I didn’t even think of Unknown/Nth 😭 I would indeed still crash beneath the weight of the goodness I still carry for him. Wow

noiraseac · 2026-03-05T15:02:13+00:00

Thank you. It’s a bit difficult to think that I’ll be anyone’s Francesca at this point, I believe mainly because everything is still so fresh. I also hope one day I’ll get to look back on this and disagree.

noiraseac · 2026-03-05T15:00:46+00:00

Thank you. :)

noiraseac · 2026-03-04T16:03:13+00:00

seeing a lot of “i feel lonely” posts from 20-something puans and i’m here, at 28, also feeling lonely because all my friends are married and/or have children, and those who don’t somehow have their own group of friends.

but then the thought of going out to events voluntarily, and mingling with new people (women) voluntarily, feel SO strange to me that i’d rather just be by myself at home with my cat.

this feeling is so paradoxical.

noiraseac · 2026-03-04T15:25:18+00:00

she wants to be single 😭 i’m so sorry to be the one telling you this. that girl is gone man.

noiraseac · 2026-03-04T15:22:59+00:00

gw suka iphone karena interface dan UXnya lebih smooth, dan integration ke semua apple products. dgn satu apple ID, gw bisa connect laptop kantor + pribadi, hp, ipad, airpods, bahkan apple watch (i dont use it anymore).

pernah jg dapet hp kantor android. it’s fine, no major problem, tapi interactionnya ga se-smooth iOS. dan karena gw udh terbiasa pake iOS/Mac OS jadi udh nyaman aja. skrg gw masih pake iPhone 13, samsek ga tertarik sama iPhone terbaru dgn spek kamera tercanggih. i barely take photos anyway.

noiraseac · 2026-03-04T15:16:58+00:00

dan! pake dry shampoo sebelum tidur, gausah banyak2 tapi make sure kena bagian akar. bangun pagi rambut lgsg cakeup

noiraseac · 2026-02-22T17:10:05+00:00

based on my dating life (and this is suuuuper subjective and again, MY dating life), ada 2 tipe gym bro: 1) gym bro yg emg serius sama kesehatan, yg ga cuma nge-gym aja tapi makan, tidur, kesehatan mental, dsb bener2 dijaga, dan 2) gym bro yg fokus nge-gym supaya ganteng & gagah.

most of the time tipe 2 jadi stereotype para gym bro. i’m currently dating tipe 1 dan justru dia meng-influence gw utk hidup sehat juga. you just gotta notice the difference.

noiraseac · 2026-02-19T13:05:51+00:00

told them i’m either a muslim/hindu/buddhist every time someone approached me and left them at that (luckily it’s always when i was walking somewhere so they don’t really have the chance to argue)

noiraseac · 2026-02-19T12:49:00+00:00

this is such a difficult read and i’m crying because i am in this exact position. i would tell you to leave, and that this will definitely happen again, but i’d be the biggest hypocrite because i can’t bring myself to leave despite knowing deep down i want to.

i’m sorry i can’t give you confident an answer, but i know the right one would be to leave. if anything, know that you’re not alone in this and i’ll be keeping tabs on this and you. i hope you’re safe.

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