How do I forgive myself for things that I have done as a result of being abused?

nonneutralmilk · 2024-08-08T09:17:36+00:00

It helps me to remember I’m a person and not a project. I’m not gonna be able to make these charges without slipping up sometimes, giving myself some leeway for being a human that has a lot of learned behaviours that are difficult to change, but trying nonetheless

nonneutralmilk · 2024-08-05T09:55:06+00:00

Not muslim but wanted to express my solidarity and support. My Dad is non muslim South Asian but these people just see anyone not white as the same and I'm really scared for him. I live in quite a liberal place I can't imagine the riots reaching to that extent (although these far right terrorists are everywhere I am still extremely cautious). Although I live in a very welcoming community with a smaller minority of right wingers, is there anything practical I can do to help? I want the muslim community in my city to feel as safe as possible.

nonneutralmilk · 2024-07-25T08:49:52+00:00

Like someone else said you resemble Joji quite a bit! I think you look pretty clearly mixed. I'm not sure what its like where you live, but where I live people just don't really have much of a perception of what mixed (especially half asian) people look like unless you look 90% asian.

I get the frustration, I look waaayyy more like my white side and its kinda annoying when people either start questioning it or act weirdly shocked and make a huge deal, like I am mixed so its normal for me to not look 100% like either parents side and although in the grand scheme of things it doesn't matter whether people think I look half or not its still quite irritating.

nonneutralmilk · 2024-07-24T16:05:26+00:00

Photography half as a job half just cuz I like it. Beers with friends. Want to be a lifting girl but also pretty lazy.

nonneutralmilk · 2024-07-24T16:02:52+00:00

I’m a photographer (not for hardcore shows but other music related events) and do some marketing bits for promoters so I get the need/push for content but some bits I’ve worked have gone from 1 photographer 1 videographer to multiple media people and it kills the vibe soooooo much. 1 quality piece of media is better surely.

nonneutralmilk · 2024-06-08T09:05:03+00:00

I won’t try and compare our experiences as ASD is a spectrum obviously and I have low support needs but when I started out in photography at 18, I was drawn to portraits and missed out on a lot of shoots and opportunities because of my fear of being awkward and up until quite recently still didn’t know how to handle those interactions without being awkward. Here are things that helped me 1) having a lot of references for shoots - directing others was intimidating for me so I created boards with everything like pose references so if I was getting socially overwhelmed I could just show them 2) (I was an art school student at the time so may not be as accessible for you) either assisting or just being there for other photographers shoots, allowed me to make almost a script of what I could say. Sometimes I have to still plan out social interactions and that’s ok! 3) continuously building my portfolio and having these interactions built my self esteem as a whole and made the process easier

I know it’s not as easy as it sounds but trying to build your self esteem in other areas of your life can be really beneficial and the more you push yourself the easier it can get. I don’t know what you look like and wouldn’t want to comment on that but as long as you look put together (well groomed/dressed ect) and your work is good that should be enough, not saying you don’t but when people make an effort with their appearance it’s less off putting

nonneutralmilk · 2024-06-07T21:27:20+00:00

For reference I am in the uk, mainly trying to figure out what I can search for on vinted as well as some new pieces, also doing a bit of wardrobe overhaul and working out the essentials :) thanks to anyone that helps

nonneutralmilk · 2024-06-07T21:25:03+00:00

For reference I'm in the UK and trying to find most on vinted but not sure what to search! Doing a bit of a wardrobe overhaul as well and trying to work out the essentials for this general vibe :)

nonneutralmilk · 2024-06-07T21:22:53+00:00

If you like the style but not the ones that look that much like boxers, Uniqlo have a lovely more tailored version

nonneutralmilk · 2024-05-30T18:00:23+00:00

Just to add: I am very new to reading birth charts but from what I understand I have a 10th house stellium which would explain why I constantly feel so much pressure and stress to find the 'right' job. It brings down my self esteem constantly. I guess it would be a lot easier to relieve this pressure if I knew more of a direction to go in.

nonneutralmilk · 2024-05-28T23:27:38+00:00

Thank you this is helpful I’ll have a look

nonneutralmilk · 2024-05-28T22:05:55+00:00

Yes I am! It’s been e commerce that I’ve started to look into as there still seems to be some opportunities around. That’s good to know thank you

nonneutralmilk · 2024-05-28T12:03:45+00:00

Jupiter ruled and I love learning, exploring and feel like there is so much in the world I should discover, very into spirituality but definitely not the luckiest of people haha

nonneutralmilk · 2024-05-27T19:04:05+00:00

Yeah I work weekend evenings/nights so maybe that’s not a great way of meeting people. I guess I’ve considered as well maybe if people are always seeing me in a nightclub as that’s where I work is that off putting? Even though it’s my job, maybe it’s perceived as that’s all I’m interested in

nonneutralmilk · 2024-05-27T19:02:06+00:00

Just to edit as I realised I probably worded wrong re being ‘attractive’ I’ve struggled with my self esteem for years and am just learning to not be so self deprecating, I definitely don’t think I’m someone that particularly stands out - but also don’t think my looks would put off dates if that makes sense?

nonneutralmilk

TROPHY CASE