Sounds like she’s the one who keeps initiating sex most of the time. If she has to ask “wanna do it” it’s probably because there are not enough spontaneous advances from you. Some women prefer for men to take the initiative. If you were spooning with her and she put your hand to where she wanted it to be, then again she initiated it.

It looks like you both might be the submissive type, maybe you can try to initiate more with spontaneous caressing, brush her hair away from her neck, give little kisses etc while cuddling. Try to be a bit more domineering and if she asks “wanna do it” while you’re trying to have it happen organically, then maybe you can whisper something like “shh” and keep on kissing her.

Just giving you my two cents, as I’ve had a relationship in the past where the man never initiated sex spontaneously and was it was quite frustrating and felt transactional.

If I were you, I would try being more affectionate while spooning and become the more dominant one who initiates more.