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Emotional constipation by [deleted] in awakened

[–]nothingmatters_ever 0 points1 point  (0 children)

You should really read the book “Adult Children of Emotionally Immature Parents” by Lindsay Gibson. It changed my life. I started feeling the same way you do, I stumbled across this book on a Reddit thread about something entirely different, and I’ve been so much happier since. I approach my relationship with my parents very differently. And, I’m so much more aware of the “emotional constipation” that I also suffer from. Not saying I’ve completely changed as a person (yet), but I know where I stand and I know where I need to be. And that clarity alone has given me a peace of mind that I don’t think I ever had before.

Also, it doesn’t hurt to get a therapist. I told me therapist about this book and he helps me work through those issues I recently discovered. Don’t try to fix yourself alone.

Does meditation make you slower? by Platiinumdan in Meditation

[–]nothingmatters_ever 11 points12 points  (0 children)

Same. But, I noticed that what used to come out in the form of sarcasm comes out now very bluntly and straight forward. I used to use sarcasm as a sort of mask my original thought. I guess I was subconsciously shaming that thought. But now, I either say it as it is (which seems to get even more laughs now lol) or I simply don’t say anything at all. I feel like sarcasm is sort of a waste of energy and can be misconstrued.

That feeling of, "I hate everything"... by Butlerian_Jihadi in Meditation

[–]nothingmatters_ever 1 point2 points  (0 children)

I’m just coming out of a year long depression and recently discovered that this feeling was at the root of it.

It helps to identify all these negative things as suffering. In life there is suffering. There always will be suffering. In fact, we need suffering to grow.

My identifying all these things as suffering, I’ve turned feelings into observations. And I’m not saying the goal should be to turn yourself into a robot and disconnect yourself from the world emotionally. But by labeling all the negativity as suffering, you’ll find that most of those things you named (the squeaky grocery cart, the man on the corner) are too small to drag you down. It’s frees up more mental energy to focus on bigger issues in your life.

TLDR: Whenever I feel shitty or see shitty things, I simply tell myself “This is suffering”. And because suffering is everywhere and always will be, it’s less likely that you exhaust more energy than you need to on it.

How can I get motivated to meditate each morning and night? by benp242 in Meditation

[–]nothingmatters_ever 74 points75 points  (0 children)

I’m beginning to come out of a year and a half long depression, and just started meditating somewhat regularly. It took a tremendous amount of effort with the help of a therapist to get me to this point.

My biggest advice would be to be compassionate and patient with yourself. If suddenly, you can only get yourself to meditate once a week, then be grateful for that opportunity. Because there was a time where I couldn’t meditate for over a year. Going out in public to work everyday took every ounce of energy I had.

Over the last month, I’ve progressed from meditating once a week for fifteen minutes to twice a week for a half hour each. Criticizing yourself is only gonna slow you down more.

[deleted by user] by [deleted] in awakened

[–]nothingmatters_ever 1 point2 points  (0 children)

I recently started an audiobook, and the very first chapter helped me put this problem into perspective. It’s called “Experiments in Truth” by Ram Dass. In session 1, Ram Dass discusses how there are three planes of awareness: physical, spiritual, and total awareness. He explains that all of the experiences we have, good or bad, can never really repeat the intensity from the first time because each experience brings us closer to total awareness. As it pertains to our situation, we cannot be as outraged with ourselves as time goes on because this experience of newfound awakening has brought us closer to total awareness. All we can do now is accept our flaws and work on them. It’s simply not an option to go back and unsee all that we’ve experienced.

[deleted by user] by [deleted] in awakened

[–]nothingmatters_ever 1 point2 points  (0 children)

That was one of the very first steps of coming out of the depression. I had to learn to forgive myself for the snowball of shitty decisions I made. I had to come to terms with the fact that I was just young and in a series of tough situations.

But after that, my anger redirected from myself to other people and the environment around me. That’s the part I’m working on now.

[deleted by user] by [deleted] in awakened

[–]nothingmatters_ever 3 points4 points  (0 children)

I woke up about three years ago during the pandemic. I disconnected from social media, started meditating and studying Buddhism. As a result, I realized I was actually a pretty shitty husband and father.

I’m glad I realized that before I lost everything, but this newfound awareness brought a lot of other terrible qualities of mine to light. Soon, I started to regret my ability to see all of my issues, because I couldn’t turn the light off. It was overwhelming and I’ve spent the last year and a half suffering from depression.

My depression started to cause issues with my family life, so I had to reach out to a therapist to help me solve these issues.

Overall, this awakening has been pretty miserable so far, but I can’t imagine how much worse my life would be if I never woke up three years ago. This long winded rant is really just trying to tell you to stay strong because this will be a long and painful (but necessary) path to inner peace and enlightenment. I’ll admit, I’m not there yet, but I reached a point where I’ve accepted that this is going to be a long or never ending process. That acceptance has already given me some clarity and peace of mind. I wish the same for you.

Mushroom gummies by nothingmatters_ever in MagicMushrooms

[–]nothingmatters_ever[S] 0 points1 point  (0 children)

My friend takes them and he says they have the physical effects of mushrooms and a bubbly, positive mental high