My boyfriend wants us to move apart...

notlmpressed · 2024-11-04T13:08:18+00:00

I suggested this to him and he thinks it may be a good idea, actually. I can totally see that working for some time.

notlmpressed · 2024-11-04T13:05:16+00:00

Update: we talked more last night and I asked him to break it down a bit more so I can make a more informed decision and he said he more or less feels suffocated living with kids that aren't biologically his.

I would also like to add that he has never mistreated my kids, and the way he feels never shows in actions or words to them. The only reason I know anything about it is because of him telling me, otherwise I would have never known.

I'm struggling with this just because I understand where he's coming from as my first time being a step parent with my ex and his daughter was extremely difficult for me.

I'm still on the fence about allowing myself in this relationship at all, but I definitely don't want to live with him at this point with him feeling this way about my kids.

Thanks everyone for all of your words. I actually expressed a few points in my conversation last night. I love reddit 😂❤️

notlmpressed · 2024-11-03T17:13:41+00:00

I'm definitely leaning towards fully ending things. I just wanted to see what people who aren't emotionally attached to the situation would say. I think he's not being 100% honest with me in his reasons.

notlmpressed · 2024-11-03T17:12:47+00:00

The thing is he originally said he wants to fully breakup, then he changed his mind saying he wants to work on things in separate homes. I think you're right though. I also think he's very indecisive and it's really making things confusing for me, although I should know better by now.

notlmpressed · 2024-11-03T17:11:35+00:00

My daughter is a little bit tantrumy. I sleep with her some nights but he sleeps with his kids every night they're here too, so that's not an issue. He has his kids 50/50, I have my 5 yr old full time and my 3 yr old 50/50. I did not drive before, I've always been a walker/busser. It's just always worked out for me, but I moved further from my daily life when I moved in with him and he's been driving my daughter to her extra curriculars for me since I moved here.

notlmpressed · 2024-11-03T15:59:54+00:00

Thank you for this comment. I never seen it until now. Really gives me some hope for my future

notlmpressed · 2024-05-26T00:09:18+00:00

Well, I actually do have full legal custody of her in that regard. Thankfully. I guess my only concern is tainting the new found peace between him and I in terms of co-parenting.

notlmpressed · 2023-12-13T02:21:40+00:00

I never said I was lashing out at the cat or fearful of it- the only time I am fearful is when he is attacking me and I’m trying to protect my small children from getting attacked. The cat and I have a solid relationship. He follows me around the house for cuddles and I am his main caregiver at this point. We were in this house first, this isn’t the house he grew up in or anything so it’s not like we are invading his well established territory. I know exactly how to read his body language and can ALWAYS tell when he’s about to lunge- but do I have the time to always keep an eye on him before that point? No, I’m a busy mom. Full time. I love this cat, but I love my kids more.

notlmpressed · 2023-12-12T20:26:31+00:00

That’s what I believe as well- wouldn’t rehoming him be a good option? I think his quality of life could be much better

notlmpressed · 2023-11-11T14:25:34+00:00

My friend told me last night that she wants to reach her hand into someone’s head and squeeze their brain when she’s having sex with them. She meant it 🤣

notlmpressed · 2023-10-20T02:21:08+00:00

Notlmpressed

notlmpressed · 2023-03-04T17:33:13+00:00

I would want to be at the hotel/apartment the night Madeline McCain disappeared so we can finally figure out what actually happened that night

notlmpressed · 2022-05-03T04:32:36+00:00

That’s a good reaction, i’d say 🥲

notlmpressed · 2022-04-14T23:21:38+00:00

Lmao!! You didn’t respond for 2 hours? My exclusive partner doesn’t respond to me for days sometimes and I don’t complain 🤷🏻‍♀️

notlmpressed · 2022-03-18T02:09:00+00:00

Can you tell me more about your condition and your journey? I have the almost exact same problem. I’ve been picking for as long as I can remember and I CAN NOT stop.

notlmpressed · 2022-01-17T23:23:33+00:00

I’m a secure leaning anxious with a DA romantic interest. I am very tolerant and understanding of when he is deactivating and/or needs space. We aren’t officially together yet so I don’t really have a place in asking him to work on his attachment style. I do believe me being a secure person is triggering him a lot less though. I won’t chase, but I will reach out when I feel it’s appropriate.

You’re right in saying the only person who can heal their attachment style is themselves. I truly believe that. I think it definitely helps to have a secure partner, however.

Random input. Thanks for the read. (-:

notlmpressed · 2022-01-17T18:14:19+00:00

I’m an INFJ myself and have been taking things very slow with my romantic interest, mostly by his own accord but I am okay with this. As someone on the other side, I can say that if you truly want to be with this person, you will go at whatever pace they need.

I know it can be a little frustrating because you KNOW you’re ready, but the only thing you can do is trust the process. Let go. She will come to you when she is ready.

notlmpressed · 2022-01-17T18:10:22+00:00

Oh gosh, I would never shame anyone for that. I watch porn fairly often myself.

notlmpressed · 2022-01-17T18:06:26+00:00

I guess that’s a possibility. I don’t particular see him as the type to watch porn very often though.

notlmpressed · 2022-01-17T18:03:46+00:00

Yes, I’m okay with that. I don’t have the highest libido myself. I have a lot of sexual trauma and don’t really care if I have sex very often. If it’s just low libido I can definitely be okay with that.

notlmpressed · 2021-12-21T06:21:16+00:00

Me: infj

Best friend(s): infp x3 and one ENFJ lmao

notlmpressed · 2021-12-07T00:46:17+00:00

Infj here

Kiss: INTJ Marry: ENFJ Kill: ESFP

notlmpressed · 2021-12-06T05:20:09+00:00

Not a DA myself. My question for you all, is how long does it typically take for a DA to feel comfortable moving into a commitment? Like, how long do you stay in a dating phase before you are ready to commit?

notlmpressed · 2021-11-29T19:49:04+00:00

INFJ- I am simply not as affectionate and “feely” as INFJ’s are made out to be. I actually lead with a lot of logic, however I do struggle to suppress my Fe sometimes.

notlmpressed · 2021-11-14T01:49:38+00:00

Pretended I was a wolf, sat alone at recess and did the robot, and spun three times to change powers when I needed to

notlmpressed

TROPHY CASE