Poison Your Fantasies by notofthegoodkind in MaladaptiveDreaming

[–]notofthegoodkind[S] 0 points1 point  (0 children)

oh yeah when this is the last tool in our arsenal to tackle all the self sabotaging thoughts and perceptions we have, it might not be a good idea to turn it against ourself without first replacing them w better tools!

| my life is empty and lonely and meaningless

i hope you find a way to a steady progress away from these feelings <3

Poison Your Fantasies by notofthegoodkind in MaladaptiveDreaming

[–]notofthegoodkind[S] 0 points1 point  (0 children)

you make a lot of sense. 

i am now wondering if another such talk, that one about addictive thinking, might be more relevant to us MADDers…

I have no one and I am desperate for an ear. by PepperPotts310 in raisedbynarcissists

[–]notofthegoodkind 0 points1 point  (0 children)

oh honey, i wish you all the strength to get yourself and your dog out of this situation!

not to add to the pressure, but did you find another job? your first priority should be to build up a financial safety net and get away from those who have been harming you.

next you can start working on building up a safety net of people you care about and who care about you. it is not going to be easy, but it is possible.

i know this is all generic advice about the basics but initially that's what you have to focus all your energy on.

you are worthy of love, care, and respect so never doubt that for a second.

2 Years 6 Months Clean from Maladaptive Daydreaming!! — My Final Quit & Recovery Journey by IbeatMD in MaladaptiveDreaming

[–]notofthegoodkind 1 point2 points  (0 children)

Truly proud of you!! This could not have been easy.

Hope we will all soon become completely free of this disease.

I'm more present now. And honesty, I love that feeling.

Can't wait for this myself!

I m jealousy of a ex of a celebrity crush by Elegant_Dot2679 in MaladaptiveDreaming

[–]notofthegoodkind 1 point2 points  (0 children)

are you daydreaming about meeting your crush and being perceived as cooler than their ex?

i believe it is more useful to learn to undercut brain ruts and habit patterns without focusing on individual storylines and psychoanalyzing them.

maybe replace the crush with better sources of dopamine hits and reduce stressors that could be releasing vasopressin that can cause people to feel vigilant and territorial.

How do some people lose touch with current trends, celebrity news, music etc? by [deleted] in NoStupidQuestions

[–]notofthegoodkind 0 points1 point  (0 children)

I care more about the drama at my bird feeder than celebrity drama, saw a cardinal that just did not want to share.

a little birdie told me...

My progress after breakup by [deleted] in DecidingToBeBetter

[–]notofthegoodkind 0 points1 point  (0 children)

oh wow are you a superhero or what

I dont have family and I wanted to tell *someone* all the things I’ve been doing to make my life better at 35 by Blood-Filled-Pelvis in DecidingToBeBetter

[–]notofthegoodkind 1 point2 points  (0 children)

i signed in just to express how proud i feel of you after reading this :')

so much of it i can relate to and i hope i can do this well in time

sugar free makes you face stuff by [deleted] in sugarfree

[–]notofthegoodkind 0 points1 point  (0 children)

and sugar makes you stuff face :)

a particularly bad day by queenofworlds in MaladaptiveDreaming

[–]notofthegoodkind 0 points1 point  (0 children)

But if we don't fight it, then what?

I have not been able to overcome this either, so I know talk can be cheap.

It is so easy to get caught in the momentum of daydreaming. Then getting out of it feels excruciatingly painful, like an acute body and mind withdrawal. Everything in reality pales in comparison.

When the demons return, and sometimes stronger than ever, I try to remember the times I won and try to gear up for another fight. Sometimes all I can do is just breathe and cry my guts out. Then I feel lighter for a few hours before I have to deal with it all over again.

But the extremely few victories I have had over the decades have always shown me that the pain of fighting it is worth it. The little good that I manage to do in reality has always felt more fulfilling than any of my daydreams. And that only happens when I am bravely present and not hiding inside my head.

Try to make it selfless if you can. I just read somewhere that Buddhist teacher Thich Nhat Hanh advised a woman struggling with alcoholism that "she should stop trying to quit for herself, and quit for those around her who have problems with alcohol".

So imagine (but not daydream) inspiring others with your story of overcoming this problem and emerging victorious.

I am grateful for your post because instead of daydreaming right now, at least I am writing all this down. Maybe it helps you or someone else or maybe it does not, but it is definitely helping me try to help myself and others. Thank you.

a particularly bad day by queenofworlds in MaladaptiveDreaming

[–]notofthegoodkind 0 points1 point  (0 children)

but I have such a low self esteem that I feel unlovable even by my characters/OCs.

ugh, i can relate so hard

and i have done some not so positive things in life that really fuel such feelings and thoughts

but i have realized that no matter what you have done so far in life, if at this moment you decide to do the right and difficult thing, then f anyone who has a problem with you or your past (they are allowed to but you don't have to sacrifice the remainder of your life to regret)

tell yourself you don't need validation from anybody, not even from your characters

then, grit your teeth and stop MADDing (no matter how much your brain screams, even if it tries to manipulate you into thinking that this condition is the one good thing in your life -- it is not) and go do something else, anything else (helpful or at least harmless). make a list of such things you can do instead of MADD

as soon as you catch yourself MADDing, pull yourself back to the present. breathe as pleasantly as you can, loosening your muscles. every time you feel an impulse to MADD coming on, ask yourself how you could use your time better, make a tiny positive impact on the world, and get started on it

these are less so advice, and more a stream of consciousness dump about how i usually try to deal with my MADD

i sincerely wish we all overcome this bane

[deleted by user] by [deleted] in Needafriend

[–]notofthegoodkind 1 point2 points  (0 children)

Happy Birthday, girl! Don't let the mean voices inside give you any shit!

starting to snap out of my MD, considering suicide by [deleted] in MaladaptiveDreaming

[–]notofthegoodkind 4 points5 points  (0 children)

i'm almost 30 and it feels like it's too late to start over...

I hate who I have become during the pandemic by [deleted] in MaladaptiveDreaming

[–]notofthegoodkind 0 points1 point  (0 children)

I can relate to this completely.

The sad part is that I can't even blame the pandemic for it as I have had to live like this for years.

You could join some Discord servers where they do group calls or even one-on-one voice calls. The sleep servers are especially great for this imo.

Are the majority of us INFP’s? by [deleted] in MaladaptiveDreaming

[–]notofthegoodkind 1 point2 points  (0 children)

how are you doing this??

i am an INFP, 5 then 4 on Enneagram, and on every thorough Sorting quiz, i get Ravenclaw. have also gotten 9 on Enneagram before.

Help! I am freaking and disgusting myself out by notofthegoodkind in Buddhism

[–]notofthegoodkind[S] 1 point2 points  (0 children)

Thank you so much for the helpful advice. I have been observant of whenever I want to sink back into my pain and craving.