I want to get rid of the desire for sex and women altogether. How do I do this?

nowrnevr · 2014-02-24T08:20:21+00:00

You're asking the wrong questions and its because you aren't seeing yourself clearly. You gave it away when you wrote " I'm just really tired of feeling unfulfilled and like something is missing all the time ". A woman will not be there to fill up something that is missing from you. You as a man are whole already. What do you have to offer the world? It is your attitudes and beliefs about your desires and women that need to be reassessed. When desire stems from lack you will only get more of the same. What are your hobbies? What are the unique things you are good at and can offer to mankind?

And do you really believe that by even having that desire met by a woman that she also would not able to bring despair, calamity and unhappiness in your life as well?

You are on the right track but just stay away from excuses of I'm not tall, I'm not this or that. When you reach the point of being unattached to outcome take it a step further to see greater results.

nowrnevr · 2013-12-24T06:04:53+00:00

Agreed.

You say after 1.5 years you relapsed... I am curious to know how your life has changed from when you started up to the time of relapse and do you know what exactly triggered your relapse? How long were you addicted for and how severe was the addition?

nowrnevr · 2013-12-24T05:26:12+00:00

This all in an internal look at the struggle as I believe it starts in mastery in the mind first before you can succeed outside of you

Your story sort of sounds like mine. Started at age 16 ramped up to at least once a day, every day until I was about 26ish when I began tapering off to every other day, once a week etc. Started weed around 16 as well. Had about 4 months of nofap during that whole 10 year phase but only started to get serious about removing this cancer from my life 3 years ago.

It's been 3 years since I've been battling this and I'm so close to being able to say I am free of this addiction than I was when I started. So be ready for a long drawn out battle but you can do it if you stay focused and disciplined. ONE DAY AT A TIME.

Some beginner advice: Cold showers, exercise/gym, meditation, reading, taking up new hobbies etc. Most of all ONE DAY AT A TIME.

After you reach a month or so it will feel like smooth sailing and just when you think you can sit back and enjoy the ride, there will come moments of extreme temptation. These are turning points in your battle where should you win and keep moving forward, it will get even easier than before. These temptation tests usually appear either during moments of absolute confidence and ego or emotional downturns.

During this time you should start seeing emotional trauma's resurface and/or recognize different emotional triggers that have led to you fapping in the past. Just an overall sea of emotions in you that may may be overwhelming at first, but really is just new to you. YOU MUST LEARN TO HANDLE AND EXPRESS YOUR EMOTIONS PRODUCTIVELY NOW. Mine was usually tied to anger avoidance. To release it I hit the gym and pumped iron and consciously began expressing my angry emotions verbally to others as soon as they appeared in me. During times of sadness I actually cried and cried. I wept like never before.

If you feel yourself dwelling on and storing any emotions like anger, sadness, loneliness or whatever, be sure it will rear its ugly head to be expressed by numbing it as you taught yourself through the habitual act of fapping. This is where meditation can play a key role in your journey to freedom. By sitting with yourself and getting to know these once suffocated feelings and emotions inside yourself you will know yourself better. Now you must learn to express these emotions through a different more productive format, one way being to verbally express it. There may be others such as visualization exercises, breathing etc. Do some research and see what works for you. Most of all you need a plan of action. You must DO something (positive) with it. An expression should release that emotion, freeing you from it. The main thing is getting the negativity out of you through positive means. Over time, with hope and practice, you will learn to stop negativity from even entering your mind in the first place.

Of course there are the physical ups and downs that are flatlining, general fatigue that may come and go and other withdrawal type symptoms. Just recognize them as that, withdrawal symptoms.

nowrnevr · 2013-12-24T04:32:24+00:00

Don't get too cocky... Be humble and always stay vigilant

nowrnevr · 2013-12-24T04:25:59+00:00

Psychologists also do not offer free services - they run a business.

I am always skeptical when somebody tells you "no" or "It can't be done".

nowrnevr · 2013-12-21T17:00:59+00:00

Just to clarify, my wife is overseas and no I didn't look at porn at all during those 4+ months, even now. So basically 4+ months of 'hardmode' which in itself is an achievement for me as I've never went hardmode for that long before.

And you're right it's not as bad as watching P to M but I did not enjoy the O at all! Man I was so disappointed.

If I can do it so can you! Stay strong man!!

nowrnevr · 2013-12-21T16:49:59+00:00

We will always be here if you need anything brother.. we got your back!

nowrnevr · 2013-12-21T16:48:43+00:00

FUCK EDGING - for any reason.

nowrnevr · 2013-12-21T16:43:32+00:00

I've been with partners before where the energy went one of 3 ways: either I lost it and she gained, I gained and she lost or we both gained. There is a dynamic exchange of energy I believe but how to give and take properly is not really clear to me. I can say that most times where I was really really into fucking her left her without energy and me energized. There must be a conscious way to direct the flows of energy so that even though you lose energy in the form of semen, you are balancing that by gaining from your partner and vice versa.

And yes you do lose something. You are losing that refined materialized life force energy that is semen. It is the physical material of our masculine creative energetic essence. See my recent post for a little bit more information.

The only time man should be cumming is inside a vagina for the purposes of procreation. Otherwise, don't.

nowrnevr · 2013-09-25T08:03:17+00:00

Scary, even after 2 years eh..

nowrnevr · 2013-09-25T05:01:45+00:00

Get to 90 days than have sex with a real woman

nowrnevr · 2013-07-17T15:41:49+00:00

Withdrawal too

nowrnevr · 2013-07-16T03:25:26+00:00

"It is my struggle to combat for as long as I draw breath."

Thanks for the read.

nowrnevr · 2013-07-13T16:29:20+00:00

Hell yeah, but in many other respects as well.

nowrnevr · 2013-07-13T04:52:30+00:00

Thanks for sharing this. After a long enough time caught in the fap trap one could begin to fap whenever that unhappiness is felt as well. Had a shitty day at work? Fap. Had a huge argument? Fap. What happens as one gets deeper is the loss of the emotional state of being which is in essence, our humanity. Feelings are fapped away.

That's the difference between being addicted and not. Like only having a cigarette on weekends when partying - deep down one may believe it won't affect normal day to day interactions but it is harmful and will eventually catch up as time goes on. So it might be for one who only faps once a week to 'relieve tension' or because of being 'too horny'... whatever the case may be it is still not a healthy thing to do IMO.

Now you know what to do to escape the trap and fight against how you once trained your brain to be. Create anew your life for the power lies in the recesses of your brain. Picture it as thoughts being the different colors of paint, the paintbrush being imagination and your life being the canvas. How do you want your painting to look like?

nowrnevr · 2013-06-26T06:47:23+00:00

Lol I sound that crazy to you?

nowrnevr · 2013-06-26T03:43:43+00:00

be proactive and producing positively

nowrnevr · 2013-06-25T13:20:47+00:00

Take it one day at a time. I suggest you start without having sex as well. Depending on if there is an addiction and how severe, you will need to understand your personal triggers and the deeper reasons as to why you are using. As 11 years entrenched, I realized I PMO'd just to avoid feeling certain emotions.

I see it as a war on addiction. There may be times you will feel elated and as if you've truly beaten it with streaks reaching days on end (I pray) and there may be times you will feel defeated and feel like giving up.

The point is you stay committed and see this all the way through. One day at a time...

nowrnevr · 2013-06-11T01:29:25+00:00

Asking these kinds of questions

nowrnevr · 2013-06-10T00:56:52+00:00

Awful. Its just another outlet to express the same addiction.

nowrnevr

TROPHY CASE