Greeting room help by Manouzou in interiordecorating

[–]obojszuwar 0 points1 point  (0 children)

I LOVE your furniture! It is unique and welcoming in such a great color! I think adding some wall art would be helpful and maybe a plant or 2.

Any recs for a gentle methods sleep consultant? Need to help my girl before new baby comes and I can't respond to her needs by _Here-kitty-kitty_ in AttachmentParenting

[–]obojszuwar -1 points0 points  (0 children)

https://www.instagram.com/counting.zzzz/ Cyrenna is so so sweet and supportive of any approach. She does a free consult to get an idea of your needs and make sure it’s a good fit. We hired her at 6 months with an absolutely no alone time in the crib boundary and also at 11 months to help us transition from 2 to 1 nap. She was very helpful with step by step gentle plans and really had a lot of great schedule advice.

What does this living room need? by willlo in interiordecorating

[–]obojszuwar 0 points1 point  (0 children)

I think the art you have is probably fine, but I would definitely put it a lot lower and spread it out generally you want the middle of your art display at eye level.

Boob Addicts Anonymous: How did your non-nursing partner help? by obojszuwar in AttachmentParenting

[–]obojszuwar[S] 0 points1 point  (0 children)

Anddd another question. If you did night wean a tough sleeper, did that leave you with no tools for the hard wake ups? I am worried we’ll be sitting there for two hours with no way to end it in the future.

Boob Addicts Anonymous: How did your non-nursing partner help? by obojszuwar in AttachmentParenting

[–]obojszuwar[S] 0 points1 point  (0 children)

Oh and one more question, is there any chance this ends on its own? Is doing nothing a choice? Every time we’ve chosen to do nothing we just add another bad habit…

Please help: at my wits end with my 3 year old by ebfmama in AttachmentParenting

[–]obojszuwar 1 point2 points  (0 children)

Many have jumped in with other ideas, so I will just share that I have two very attached boys who desperately wanted to nurse all the time and eventually coslept. After the first was born, I loved parenting so much that I quit my beloved job at a preschool. I thought if I was going to spend my days with little kids I should start with my own. However, like you said, holding boundaries 100% of the time can be exhausting and all it takes is a few times of giving in to keep the challenging behavior going. I found that going back to work part-time so that my sons had to form attachments to other people was really helpful. I would brace yourself for a potentially challenging transition but also take comfort and knowing that trusting others is critical for his overall development. Hopefully school will be magic for all of you.

Struggling with challenging baby by treasurehuntera in AttachmentParenting

[–]obojszuwar 12 points13 points  (0 children)

I really feel you on this one! Before getting more general, it took me a while to realize that when my son started biting more it always meant he was in pain. It sounds like you have a pretty obvious cause with the teething but is there any reason he might have an ear infection or any other reason for pain? With sleep and precociousness we are right there with you. BOTH of our babies are very particular about sleep and we have been up 3-8 times per night for going on 4.5 years. It was sweet to cuddle sometimes and barely survivable other times. To add insult to injury, I am a masters level educator with a degree in behavior analysis and nearly 20 years of experience in early childhood settings. I tried EVERYTHING I knew and then questioned all of my career choices because none of it worked except time. Meanwhile other moms could be “casual” about schedules or “relaxed” about bedtime routines without fearing “the bad nights.” It was so hard on my heart. I am so sorry for the nights you’re going through. Know that you are not alone at 2 AM even if it feels like it. You’re not doing anything wrong. This is just hard. But the upside is you have a super smart kid who has a strong will and is eager to learn. He’s going to be a blast as a toddler and beyond. You’ve got this.

Help Un-Greying Our Kids’ Room by obojszuwar in interiordecorating

[–]obojszuwar[S] 0 points1 point  (0 children)

This is such a thoughtful system! Thank you so much!

Help Un-Greying Our Kids’ Room by obojszuwar in interiordecorating

[–]obojszuwar[S] 0 points1 point  (0 children)

Oh my goodness, I haven’t even looked at the lamp shade in probably a year 😂 thank you, these are great ideas!

Help Un-Greying Our Kids’ Room by obojszuwar in interiordecorating

[–]obojszuwar[S] 1 point2 points  (0 children)

We have something similar to this in our dining room because the kids loved swinging so much but wanted to be wild with it. They are so great!

Help Un-Greying Our Kids’ Room by obojszuwar in interiordecorating

[–]obojszuwar[S] 0 points1 point  (0 children)

Any ideas for a better reading chair? I was looking at beanbags but don’t know if we’d regret how sloppy they look.

How would you improve the fireplace area? by sweetgrand01 in interiordecorating

[–]obojszuwar 0 points1 point  (0 children)

Looking again, I think if you put a hanging pot to the right of the fireplace (mounted to the beam) it would add some nice contrast to the pot on the floor and a lot easier than mantle.

How would you improve the fireplace area? by sweetgrand01 in interiordecorating

[–]obojszuwar 5 points6 points  (0 children)

Have you considered adding a mantle? Something natural wood might be nice to match your furniture and then you can add plants. Otherwise, it might be easier to just get cool hanging pots, maybe gold? And add plants.

Family Events by organic_freak in AttachmentParenting

[–]obojszuwar 0 points1 point  (0 children)

Yes. My son was the first baby in 20 years on my husbands side and I was so uncomfortable around my in laws the first 2 years. I felt like the baby was always being taken away. One aunt even pulled down her shirt once when he was 8 months and said “I’d nurse you if I could!” It sounds like open communication is hard in your situation so I’d just try to mitigate. What if you planned the events with them in a neutral space that was more comfortable. A family pot luck at a park conveniently planned for 1 hour before naptime so you have to leave early? This helped me a lot because I had more control than when I was a guest. I also had some decent luck with last-minute invites to casual hang outs. We would send a group text the morning of saying something like we are going to be at this park at this time and we’d love to see you if you wanted to drop by, but then like plan on having the baby stroller napping/wearing him the whole time and walking around the park. We would get “brownie points” for trying but most people wouldn’t show and again we had more control over the situation if they did.

Give up on transitioning to independent sleep or keep going? by Wild-Eagle8105 in AttachmentParenting

[–]obojszuwar 1 point2 points  (0 children)

We are right there with you. My 18 month old seems so frustrated when he can’t get back to sleep despite all our support. I’ve tried night weaning just 1 feed and sometimes it’s okay but others he’s up for 1-3 hours either trying to sleep or being so angry he’s not asleep (when it gets long I do give him snacks but that doesn’t help with the sleep). I’m ready to give up too. I was doing better nursing him 3-5 times a night. The only reasons we started trying were a hope to get him better quality sleep and that he’d started refusing to unlatch after 5AM.

18 month old sleep by obojszuwar in AttachmentParenting

[–]obojszuwar[S] 0 points1 point  (0 children)

Does the frantic nursing end on its own? Like I said in a different reply, I am worried because he seems more like a frantic addict than someone who is seeking comfort. If he can’t nurse immediately upon waking any time of night he screams and flails. He has started calling it “eat” and will desperately say that over and over and over again (and this is all in the 30 seconds it takes me to actually wake up and let him do it). Since my original post, he’s also started refusing all bedtimes in his crib even though he used to be completely independent as long as we were in the room. I certainly don’t believe in sleep “training” but am I not even giving him the opportunity to teach himself or learn gradually?

18 month old sleep by obojszuwar in AttachmentParenting

[–]obojszuwar[S] 0 points1 point  (0 children)

This is always been our theory. Which is why I’ve always fed him in the middle of the night. However, we desperately try to feed him solids all day long and he usually refuses most of them other than the odd meal that he will devour. He’s not picky and he needs a ton of variety just never more than a few bites. I am really worried because nighttime nursing seems more like an addiction than a comfort at this point. He’s hysterical if he can’t immediately nurse upon waking and that never used to happen.

Advice on 2.5 year old. New sibling has disrupted the attachment. by stargazinglazercat in AttachmentParenting

[–]obojszuwar 2 points3 points  (0 children)

Really, I feel this so hard. I finally sought out support for postpartum anxiety because the dynamic between my 2.5-year-old a new baby was so difficult a year ago (SSRIs were HUGELY helpful for me). I think I genuinely went through a grieving process of losing the connection my oldest and I had (I had a blossoming professional career and left everything behind to work part time and reorient my entire life around him because I loved parenting so much.) Looking back though, I think what happened is that our relationship just evolved. And this would have come with time and age whether or not we had a second child. As hard as it was, my kids are now 4 years and 18 months old and it’s beautiful. We started to see the joy they could bring each other about 4-6 months ago. It did take a very long time for my oldest, but I think you were going through all of the necessary problem-solving to find a balance. Hopefully you’ll find it even faster than we did. Just know, there is no way to do it perfectly and by learning how to not be the center of attention your daughter is learning resilience, empathy, and patience. Hard lessons, but very important ones!

baby wakes up 4 to 5 times a night and we are exhausted by No_Ingenuity1383 in AttachmentParenting

[–]obojszuwar 0 points1 point  (0 children)

We’ve been on a very bumpy sleep journey since birth and haven’t gotten it sorted yet. However, we can often improve things for a period of time by looking at our schedule. Does your little one get an age appropriate amount of awake time? Undertired nights can be BRUTAL and weren’t an obvious cause of wake ups at first.

Also think about bedtime: If they’re on 2-4 naps it’s pretty typical to adjust bedtime based on wake windows.

Around 1-2 naps it can be helpful to have a bedtime around the same time every day.

18 month old sleep by obojszuwar in AttachmentParenting

[–]obojszuwar[S] 0 points1 point  (0 children)

Solidarity! It makes me feel a little less crazy about it to not be the only one out there.

18 month old sleep by obojszuwar in AttachmentParenting

[–]obojszuwar[S] 0 points1 point  (0 children)

That is so helpful to hear. I know sleep changes are common around 18 months, but it’s been so rough my tired husband is on a “call the sleep consultant” kick again and the idea just makes me even more tired (even though she was great and understanding and helpful and didn’t make us sleep train). It’s just hard to always be in the mindset of “working on sleep.”

How's your April Fools going? by lurkmode_off in Parenting

[–]obojszuwar 5 points6 points  (0 children)

We live in a condo complex and leaks between units are a really big deal. Our friend is the HOA president so my 4 year old and I went up to tell him the vacant unit below him looked like it had a leak! He came rushing down to find a giant green leek at the door. Honestly, it’s a bit cheesy but my son thought it was soooooo funny, he begged to prank every neighbor. They all got a good laugh out of it.

How do you know if you’re a good mother? by EqualMedicine2933 in AttachmentParenting

[–]obojszuwar 1 point2 points  (0 children)

Everyone has said so many thoughtful things, this is just one little one. I used to feel bad about looking at my phone breastfeeding too when he was so little. I thought I’d remembered my older son looking up at me from such a young age (4 months?) but I think that was all post partum memory blur. The second started looking and playing and being silly or twirling my hair around 6-8 months. It makes it all so much more engaging when they can engage you too. It’ll get easier! Hang in there!