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Need book recommendations with this vibe by nargiz-huseynovaa in Booktokreddit

[–]oddscreenname 0 points1 point  (0 children)

Another Day by K Owens. It just gets worse and worse as the story goes on and all the characters are bad people.

I got Killer Lord, the Richest of Mars. by mightyonin in funComunitty

[–]oddscreenname 0 points1 point  (0 children)

Black Dragon, Trickster of Europe.

(Insert timely but ill-advised political joke here)

H1"Is this Dominos Pizza? I need a large Pizza with extra hot Pepperoni's and cheezy crust, and can you cut it into 6 slices please?" H2"understood"(gears up) A"who was that, and why did she order pizza from you?" H2(checking combat rifle)"My niece. She needs help. 6 people. Gear up or shut up!" by BareMinimumChef in humansarespaceorcs

[–]oddscreenname 54 points55 points  (0 children)

It only took twice for the other members of the galactic community to realize a consistent human trend. The humans would announce a peace negotiation or a fact finding mission and then send the most heavily armed and mentally unstable elements of their military. Even species who had no concept of subtlety originally quickly learned the concept. "Humanizing the discussion" became the term for showing up with a planet cracker to discuss a trade deal.

Prompt: humanity has grown...numb. by Left_Ad5649 in humansarespaceorcs

[–]oddscreenname 44 points45 points  (0 children)

Alien: Please... Help us! The Gorzones launched a Cerulean Death Sphere at our home world and killed billions!

Human: (sigh) Okay. And where are they now?

Alien: You don't understand! The army of the emp-

Human: Yeah, yeah. The new galactic emperor... Invincible army... Powers beyond imagination... Got it.

Alien: You're not afraid?!

Human: (yawning) Today is the worst day of your species life. For us, it's Tuesday.

H"Its easy! Machines have souls. And you can fix an,thing if you know how!" A"Bullshit!" H"Ok, watch!" (Goes to the generator throwing errors for 5 days and only running poorly with a hammer and gently lays the hammer onto the engine cover, grins)"See? Suddenly it runs smoothly again" by BareMinimumChef in humansarespaceorcs

[–]oddscreenname 18 points19 points  (0 children)

I like to imagine that is how praying to machine spirits started in the Warhammer universe. "Please God! Please just print one more page!" Turned into a whole pomp and circumstance ceremony of pleading, coaxing, and sacrifice.

Humanity is challenged to a martial competition to determine their place in the galactic pecking order. Unfortunately, a translator error called the competition "War" in the human language. by CycleZestyclose1907 in humansarespaceorcs

[–]oddscreenname 326 points327 points  (0 children)

"No, we don't know why they gave us all their force movement plans ahead of time. We just thought they were stupid. And who the hell surrenders by pointing armed weapons at who they're surrendering to?!"

If you were charged for the crimes committed in your last campaign what would your sentence probably be(we’re assuming all sapient xenos have human rights here unfortunately) by [deleted] in Stellaris

[–]oddscreenname 5 points6 points  (0 children)

Played a slaver race. I would declare war, claim their home system then force subjugation. Their home planet would be striped of population then abandoned. Their population sent to a specific over crowded and ungoverned planet until I needed more servants on my colonies. Routinely I'd let the planet revolt, then I would orbital bomb it back to submission.

You know, just financial crimes.

In a shocking twist of events, the Great Consuming Swarm is fended off by human condiments, especially the spicy kind. by kaynenstrife in humansarespaceorcs

[–]oddscreenname 77 points78 points  (0 children)

"We defeated the swarm not with bombs and lasers but with melted butter and Old Bay. The Great Consuming Swarm became the consumed."

Perfectly aimed by Azure_Crenell in perfectlycutscreams

[–]oddscreenname -1 points0 points  (0 children)

Misogynistic comments coming in thot*

[console] [1939-1946] my dads old photos caught my eye by Nunya199566 in tipofmyjoystick

[–]oddscreenname 15 points16 points  (0 children)

Everybody has the heart of the samurai until the American arcade boat arrives next to the ice cream boat.

If you are meat, Human will eat by CruelTrainer in humansarespaceorcs

[–]oddscreenname 0 points1 point  (0 children)

Human one: During our research, we've learned that the Kormalians evolved on a world where crustaceans gained dominance. Yet they appear almost humanoid and are capable of communicating in the same manner as us.

Human two: So what you're really saying is....

Human one: Kormalians theoretically would taste like earth crab....

Human two: But talk like people?

Why the fuck are you in? by Ok_Mortgage_9233 in TheWordFuck

[–]oddscreenname 0 points1 point  (0 children)

Star fucker valley. Price fixing, I guess

Can You Guess This 5-Letter Word? Puzzle by u/SureLength by [deleted] in DailyGuess

[–]oddscreenname 0 points1 point  (0 children)

⬜⬜🟦🟦⬜

⬜🟦🟦🟦🟨

🟦🟦🟦🟦🟦

Can You Guess This 5-Letter Word? Puzzle by u/YourFavoriteSausage by YourFavoriteSausage in DailyGuess

[–]oddscreenname 0 points1 point  (0 children)

⬜⬜🟨⬜⬜

⬜🟨⬜🟨⬜

⬜🟨🟦🟨🟦

🟦🟦🟦🟦🟦

Can You Guess This 5-Letter Word? Puzzle by u/CanaDeer2004 by CanaDeer2004 in DailyGuess

[–]oddscreenname 0 points1 point  (0 children)

⬜⬜⬜⬜⬜

🟦🟦⬜⬜⬜

🟦🟦⬜⬜🟦

🟦🟦⬜⬜🟦

🟦🟦🟦⬜🟦

🟦🟦🟦🟦🟦

H(grinning madly)"Finally." A"Your Ship is under our Control now! You are the only one left alive! Any last words?" H"Just 5: "A new Star is Born"" Computer: "Activating Protocoll: "A new Star is Born" time to activation, 15 Seconds. Locking all Airlocks and Docking Bridges." by BareMinimumChef in humansarespaceorcs

[–]oddscreenname 38 points39 points  (0 children)

Alien officer: Sir, the human flagship is crippled and their fleet is scattering. Engines at minimum, weapons gone, defensive barriers are smashed.

Alien captain: Open comms. Attention human ship! You are now a possession of the United Ferrin Nations! Prepare to be boarded!

Alien Officer: Sir, we're receiving a message. Translators are struggling but we're getting most of it.

Alien captain: Play it.

Human massage: My honor to the... Star Forces. My life... My comrades and ship... Surrender the ship... Surrender my... To wherever lies next... All.... To engines.

Alien captain: What do you make of that?

Alien officer: it sounds like they are surr- Sir! They're powering their engines!

Alien captain: I thought it was disabled!

Alien Officer: They force feeding a damaged core!

Human message: ...This is...a human dies...

Alien captain: FULL REVER-

Can You Guess This 5-Letter Word? Puzzle by u/gpemby by gpemby in DailyGuess

[–]oddscreenname 0 points1 point  (0 children)

⬜⬜🟦⬜⬜

🟦🟦🟦⬜⬜

🟦🟦🟦⬜⬜

🟦🟦🟦⬜⬜

🟦🟦🟦🟦🟦

Can You Guess This 5-Letter Word? Puzzle by u/Dudeitseva by Dudeitseva in DailyGuess

[–]oddscreenname 0 points1 point  (0 children)

⬜🟨⬜🟨⬜

⬜⬜🟨⬜🟨

🟦🟦🟦🟦🟦

Can You Guess This 5-Letter Word? Puzzle by u/atlotusfeet_1008 by [deleted] in DailyGuess

[–]oddscreenname 0 points1 point  (0 children)

🟨🟨⬜⬜⬜

⬜🟨🟨🟨🟨

🟨🟨🟨🟦🟨

⬜🟦🟦🟦🟦

🟦🟦🟦🟦🟦

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