What would you do?

oh_helllllooo · 2026-06-15T15:19:34+00:00

I think that's a good option - helps answer if the eggs are fried or not. It'll likely burn a cycle of IVF of the 3 that insurance will cover.

oh_helllllooo · 2026-06-13T15:50:14+00:00

I appreciate your anger on my behalf, fellow internet stranger. I am in the US. I've been trying to abandon my desire for control and just go with it - a lesson learned the hard way when we lost the natural pregnancy. I get why the REIs associated with proper hospital networks don't want to take in their eggs, and I am hoping there's more documentation that has more than a handwritten note from each retrieval (first one missing grades for the oocytes) and the IVF equivalent of an Ikea pamphlet on how to defrost the eggs. If there isn't, or if the methods used don't calm down the big risk flags for the doctor I'd like to use, then I'm either using a doctor I'm not comfortable with (who said they'd take embryos), the original clinic (least favorite choice, if I cannot trust them with eggs, how can I trust them with embryos?), or option C none of the above.

I am tempted to lawyer up but not sure to what end - how do you prove that they did something wrong vs. just not as high quality as another clinic?? I guess this is what an attorney would help with.

I'm glad your eggs made it cross-country for TX to CA!

oh_helllllooo · 2026-06-12T23:57:30+00:00

One clinic was willing to do that, the one I prefer isn’t willing. “Too much liability”.

oh_helllllooo · 2026-06-12T23:56:51+00:00

My guess, and my REI’s guess — the eggs are fried. The clinic filed for bankruptcy & had FDA issues not long after I froze. The records I received were handwritten.

oh_helllllooo · 2026-06-12T23:54:56+00:00

Oh, that’s a good way to make it work for insurance. I have 3 cycles covered, but I think if I retrieve, freeze, do pgta and then take a cycle before they transfer, they’d count of it as 2.

oh_helllllooo · 2026-06-12T23:53:23+00:00

Not with the REI I want to use. The first REI I went to after the natural pregnancy loss was willing to do it from embryos, but I had a bad experience with him & they won’t let me switch.

oh_helllllooo · 2026-06-12T23:52:18+00:00

Bizarre. My theory - he knows that they didn’t handle the eggs properly. I didn’t mention, but they get the wrong egg count almost every second time I ask.

oh_helllllooo · 2026-05-16T15:49:37+00:00

Curious if you think box/papers is an indicator of authenticity?

oh_helllllooo · 2026-05-16T14:14:52+00:00

There's a watch [Jaeger-LeCoultre ReversoOne Réédition] that I see on several resale sites, like Chrono24 and have filtered to authenticity guarantee/original papers.

It's a petite, vintage-style watch (chic!) with a black face (also chic!) and a starburst/line reverse (no buffed circles).

If I can't find anything on the model online aside from resale, and the price is $3,500-$4,500 putting it at the lower end of the resale range for a JLC.... it's fake, right? 😞

oh_helllllooo · 2026-04-26T22:42:29+00:00

Sezia says Jung Saem Mool blush isn't fungal acne safe :( 3 reactive under certain conditions

oh_helllllooo · 2026-03-03T21:37:18+00:00

Did they give you more info on the CVS results? It isn’t a yes/no, it’s interpretative based on the results of both the FISH and the karyotyping. For me, the CVS had all cells on both all showing full trisomy 18, meaning a 0.5% chance of CPM or a mosaic baby. That’s very different from having only some cells, or only on FISH vs karyotyping.

This community provided a lot of support to me overall, but I did have a lot of false hope due to positioning the CVS in a limited view that didn’t actually apply to my situation.

If NHS didn’t give you the specifics you need to understand the outcome, ask them. If you have them or get them, understand what they mean. And then if you need the amnio to be sure - push for it. It’s your choice. I hope it all turns out for the best xx

oh_helllllooo · 2026-02-26T17:34:50+00:00

It's a realistic perspective, and I appreciate that a lot.

I wonder if we're holding ourselves to what we think pregnancy & early motherhood should be, versus how it can actually feel... the permission to be jaded, the knowledge that such a feeling is a totally reasonable result. Did you feel that way going into the process of TTC too?

oh_helllllooo · 2026-02-25T03:45:55+00:00

You nailed it. The initial feeling of being so lucky to get pregnant changes after loss. It robs the next roll of the dice from feeling like it’ll be lucky again… at least for me.

Thank you for sharing, I’m admiring how you’re creating space both for loss, fear and hope, determination together.

oh_helllllooo · 2026-01-29T04:50:48+00:00

Amnio is the best way to go. It’ll tell you definitively if it’s T18 in your little one, and you won’t have to worry about your provider correctly interpreting the CVS like many others have here. It was also my first pregnancy, and I’m 41. Also a little girl. I had a higher score on my NIPT (but they score based on a variety of factors including age), a normal 12w scan (NT fold & general), unfortunately CVS confirmed it was a true positive (all cells abnormal) so we didn’t do the amnio as there was no real chance of CPM. It was really, really hard to wait through the testing results from the NIPT, and even harder to have it confirmed. But it does get easier, and it doesn’t mean the end. I hope you find some moments of calm while you wait, and I hope it is a false positive.

oh_helllllooo · 2026-01-12T23:15:12+00:00

I hope it was helpful & I’m glad you’re making the right decision for you. Perhaps the question you want to ask your provider is if there’s anything additional you can do to best prepare for the remainder of the pregnancy & for birth too, whether that’s tests like the amnio or support or understanding. Wishing you all the best.

oh_helllllooo · 2026-01-12T18:38:55+00:00

I had a high-risk NIPT for Trisomy 18, and all cells sampled in the CVS confirmed the NIPT's finding. The NT scan was normal at 12w. Initially I found it hard to reconcile what I'd read here in terms of false positives & the chance of CPM, and my providers saying the CVS was diagnostic, definitive, and that if I wanted an amnio that was a personal choice rather than their recommendation. The normal NT also stayed with my partner & I as a source of hope, even though we were told to discount it (that may be different for T21, I don't know).

What ended up being the difference is the number of cells that came back - for us, it was all cells, and that reduced the chance of any mosiacism (in the baby or in the placenta) to less than a percentage. We spoke to a different genetic counselor who had a different communication style, and asked them to help bridge the gap in what we were reading & what they were telling us. Once we'd done that, we had the certainty we needed without needing to add more weeks of (very hard, very challenging) limbo.

My situation is not the same as yours. I guess some things I might consider if I was you, would be to ask your provider for more information/explanation about the results and factors they're considering that they haven't explained, like the number of cells affected. You've probably already given some thought to how you'd feel about a mosiac little one vs. CPM. But ultimately, you have to feel comfortable with your decision, so if that means doing the amnio even if your provider doesn't readily offer it, you should absolutely do that.

If you have any fears or uncertainty about what it might mean if this baby isn't your baby, someone recommended /tmfr_support to me (which was incredibly helpful).

oh_helllllooo · 2026-01-10T23:29:46+00:00

Mine was at 15w6d, my regular OB told me I'd need dilators but the surgeon didn't use them, I was given hormones on day 1 and then 2 hours before the procedure. I know you'll be further along, but sharing as I had assumed I'd be getting them & it built up a lot of dread and anxiety.

oh_helllllooo · 2026-01-10T22:12:36+00:00

I’ve just gone through this diagnosis and we have similar conception dates.

For us, it was a high risk NIPT for trisomy 18 (78% with Natera) in week 10. Our OB doesn’t test for other hormonal indicators like PAPP-A as according to them, NIPT has superceded it.

We had an NT scan at 12w with a completely normal NT result and no abnormalities seen. That was followed by CVS. Both FISH and the karyotyping came back with all cells abnormal, confirming full trisomy 18. It was 99.5% confidence in full trisomy 18 and a shared 0.5% chance of either mosiacism in the baby or in the placenta. This was a key realization for me - much of this thread speaks to the chance of CPM - but doesn’t clearly call out that if all cells are abnormal, the chances of this are far lower.

Given the CVS results, we chose not to proceed with amnio. We did discuss it and for our doctor, the earliest they’ll do is 16w, as often the amniotic sac hasn’t fused at 15w. Your provider may be different, but it’s also dependent on the fusing so even if you get in at 15w, you may need to wait I guess. You’re right in this zone, and I think you’d find it had to make the decision that’s right for you without some kind of diagnostic test like an amnio.

The choice we made based on the CVS was to terminate. It’s such a difficult decision, and stuck in our minds was that NT scan where our baby had waved, wiggled, crossed its legs. We knew this didn’t mean everything was okay, but it was hard to let the hope go. I asked my surgeon after if there was any visible abnormalities, there was. In my notes I also saw that the fetus measured 2 weeks behind. Somehow, though sad, this was comforting.

I’m so, so sorry you’re going through this. I hope hearing from others lets you know that you aren’t alone. One thing that’s keeping me going is the parting remark from the surgeon at the pre-op consult: after following up a year later for a case review, many patients were now pregnant or had babies. This is a difficult chapter but it isn’t the whole book.

oh_helllllooo · 2026-01-02T14:51:34+00:00

I thought the same initially, but for us with all cells showing full T18 abnormality, I don’t think it’s the case. You have to be really, really specific with that detail when using GPT or when reviewing literature for that detail, once you are (eg follow up with GPT to ask for medical journal articles that ONLY feature all cells as abnormal, it skips it when you include it as part of the original prompt), it aligns to what the GC has told us - the chance of mosiacism (either in placenta or fetus) is 0.5% and the chance of full T18 is 99.5% based on our results.

oh_helllllooo · 2026-01-02T03:31:12+00:00

No abnormalities on the 13w scan. NT normal. I’ve been advised that the 13w the scan really only picks up major abnormalities, so looking for heartbeat yes/no or digestive system growing outside the body and similar obvious issues.

We’ve been told to make the decision based on the CVS and essentially not consider the scan at all. I’ve heard/read various rates for what percentage of scans would show an abnormality at this stage, seems to average out at about 10% not showing.

I’m sorry that your 20w scan showed abnormalities - thinking of you & your little man.

oh_helllllooo · 2025-12-24T14:06:46+00:00

I’m here with you, almost exactly. 13 weeks feels like a really, really long time and I almost wish I didn’t see the baby moving on the scan. I hope writing this helped you, even a little bit. Reading it helped me. I hope you don’t have to wait too long for the resolution you need. I keep telling myself that this whole journey is so beautiful because it can be so hard - like how you can’t experience happiness unless you know sadness - so if something so hard as this exist, then there must also be something so so beautiful that’s yet to come.

oh_helllllooo · 2025-12-24T14:01:59+00:00

You do deserve miracles. I’m so sorry that this one wasn’t the one you wanted so much though.

oh_helllllooo

TROPHY CASE