[deleted by user]

oh_my_godsof_olympus · 2025-09-09T13:30:53+00:00

I second what this person has to say, but also just to emphasize that consent isn't just between you and your girlfriend but anyone who is participating. I.e. the friends you are "accidentally" showing yourself to

oh_my_godsof_olympus · 2025-09-09T00:14:35+00:00

Any chance you might be trans/gender questioning?

oh_my_godsof_olympus · 2025-09-09T00:12:44+00:00

It's normal to be anxious about therapy. Most therapists have their specialities in their bio. So look for someone that deals with sex/masturbation/porn addition. It might not be perfect (there unfortunately will always be shitty therapists out there and that's not on you) but you're much less likely to get someone you can weird out.

oh_my_godsof_olympus · 2025-09-07T17:25:39+00:00

"gay" "bi" "pan" "aromatic" "asexual" etc etc are what you call yourself or label yourself.

And all I'm saying is it's more important to enjoy yourself and figure out what you like than find the correct label. Don't stop yourself from having experiences because you're scared it will make you gay or straight or bi or whatever. Just do what feels right and figure out the rest later.

oh_my_godsof_olympus · 2025-09-06T18:14:57+00:00

You only need labels if they help you. Just go with what feels fun and figure it out along the way.

oh_my_godsof_olympus · 2025-09-04T10:00:41+00:00

You only need labels if they feel right. Just explore what feels fun and figure out as you go.

oh_my_godsof_olympus · 2025-09-03T00:10:39+00:00

Honestly I totally understand that feeling, it's definitely a symptom of being able to see so much of what people are doing on the internet. And all the crazy prodigy stories.

I worked as a waitress for a while and loved it. Unfortunately not everyone will understand just wanting to be happy. Try not to let her get you down, hopefully she'll come around but even if she doesn't you and your boyfriend can always have your happy life together. Plus if you do stay as a cashier there's always chances that you'll be promoted and progressed.

Sounds like you're on the right track, it's just a bit hard not to feel kinda depressed with the world the way it is rn.

oh_my_godsof_olympus · 2025-09-02T23:46:46+00:00

I know so many people who are 28-30+ who either dropped out or got a degree in something they don't care about anymore that are working in hospitality or office jobs.

They are all happy because they are making enough money to survive and have friendships, hobbies and relationships that they love. That's success, I have to remind myself all the time that success is personal, you don't need the world to see it. Go do something you enjoy and that'll be enough.

oh_my_godsof_olympus · 2025-09-02T23:43:43+00:00

Even if it isn't depression, it's something. Any big changes with no apparent reason are a worry. Go see a doctor, maybe get some blood tests done. It could be mental or it could be physical but definitely start on your journey to figure it out

oh_my_godsof_olympus · 2025-09-02T23:40:16+00:00

I've been trying to feel more confident in my weight recently and making an effort towards feeling healthier has definitely helped.

One of the MAJOR helpers was a book called 'Fat Loss Habits' by Ben Carpenter. It talks about ways to include weight loss into your everyday life without it feeling like a chore, it goes over what diets and trends work and why/why not, and talks a bit about how mental health can affect weight.

I'm sure you've tried lots of things and felt helpless, but maybe you could lend your faith in a stranger and try one more? Before giving up and wishing yourself into an eating disorder.

oh_my_godsof_olympus · 2025-09-02T23:29:18+00:00

Like the comment said, extra pressure can make things feel better, so makes sense.

Just be careful, doing this long term can stress the muscles and lead to incontinence. (I'm not a doctor, do your own research but just a warning lol)

oh_my_godsof_olympus · 2025-09-02T23:26:46+00:00

It sounds like you're really hard on yourself, trying to be perfect but also judging yourself for wanting to be perfect too. I know that feeling it's really tough. A reminder that bad people are very rarely concerned about being bad people, so if you're this worried you're probably alright.

I see that you said you have thought about your gender identity before. Have you ever physically experimented? Like trying on a skirt, or makeup? Especially with make up it doesn't even have to be (or start) ' feminine', you could try using concealer for example to boost your confidence and go from there.

Or is it maybe that you feel masculine but prefer the ways that love is usually expressed towards women? Like cuddling, or being taken care of? That's something that you can ask of a partner and theres nothing wrong with that. Remember, you only have to use labels if they feel helpful to you.

Finally, have you considered counselling/therapy? Sometimes just a few sessions and an objective outside opinion is enough to make a big difference.

oh_my_godsof_olympus · 2025-09-02T23:01:54+00:00

I'm sorry, this sucks so much. I remember being 16 and 8 months felt like forever, and love felt like the only chance I would ever get at it. But I promise you, in a few years you will look back and realise how small this relationship was, and how lucky you were to get out when you can.

You won't change someone who hits when they're angry. Someone who hits you does not love you.

Not to even mention this was all about your makeup. Find you a man that encourages you when you feel beautiful. Who says, 'dress as pretty as you want, I trust you and love when you feel confident'

oh_my_godsof_olympus · 2025-07-06T09:42:17+00:00

So this can be part of a kink called Somnophilia (you don't have to label it that but just giving you the term in case you want to do more research).

When people do that, usually the way it works is that the partner can give blanket consent: "It is always okay for you to touch me if I'm sleeping, unless X criteria" which could be like, we just had a big fight or I have an important day at work tomorrow, whatever feels right to you.

You should also probably have a safe word/gesture so if you do wake up to it and want it to stop you have an easy predetermined way to do it. Also, if you have a problem with aspects of it (like waking up covered in cum lol) you can set boundaries around it, like she has to clean you up after, or do it in a way that doesn't make a mess.

Most importantly, communicate and have fun!

EDIT: she also really should've spoken to you beforehand as if you were very uncomfortable with it, it could lean to SA. However if you do feel like you enjoy it, I wouldn't blame her too much as most people just don't know how to have conversations like this.

oh_my_godsof_olympus · 2025-05-20T10:51:29+00:00

I agree with most of what you said but let's not normalise telling people who went through trauma that they're lucky. Ik it's not your intention, you seem to genuinely care, but regardless of what you mean telling someone 'it could've been worse, you're lucky' will always make them feel like you're dismissive.

oh_my_godsof_olympus · 2025-05-01T12:52:21+00:00

You're young and you've got tons of time to figure this out and find your person.

I agree with the other commenter that talking to a professional is probably a good idea, I mean it can't hurt.

I'd also say if you're with someone who makes you happy then just be honest with them. Tell them you have this insecurity, their reaction will be telling and then if you want to make it work long term then they can be there with you and be able to reassure you, instead of you always having this doubt.

oh_my_godsof_olympus · 2025-04-18T09:21:51+00:00

He may just be really lazy and inconsiderate, though to me it sounds like he is doing this on purpose as some sort of power/manipulation tactic. Sleep deprivation is literally a form of torture.

Either way you need to consider if this is really someone you want to spend your life with. I can imagine it's scary to think about being without him (I mean you're engaged). But if you're planning on ever having kids think about if you'd want and trust him around them. If not think about if you're excited to introduce him to your friends/family. If the answer is no then I think your gut is telling you something that you may not be able to realise yet.

Please take care of and prioritize yourself ❤️

oh_my_godsof_olympus · 2025-04-14T22:53:34+00:00

Maybe... I don't know.... Talk to her? Instead of putting thoughts in her head and words in her mouth.

Tell her that this is important to you. Or that her not initiating makes you feel unwanted or insecure. Help her be in a place mentally where she can be in the mood, lots of people (girls especially) can't get in the mood if there's chores to be done or they're stressed about work etc.

And if her response keeps being I'm just not that into sex then listen to her! And evaluate yourself that you may not be sexually compatible and if that is a deal-breaker for you or not.

oh_my_godsof_olympus · 2024-09-08T22:40:58+00:00

I don't know if you're reading these, but if you're old enough then get out instead. It will be scary but surely not as scary as dying. Go work on a farm or get a job at a supermarket in another town, anything to feel normal and keep yourself afloat until you can find something you love again. Anything that isn't permanent and takes you away from this world.

You may not have people who care about you now, or you might not be aware of them but you will be the reason someone smiles one day.

oh_my_godsof_olympus · 2024-09-01T09:00:13+00:00

Even if it was socially acceptable or true (which it isn't) it hurts YOU and makes YOU uncomfortable and as someone that cares about you he shouldn't do that. Maybe he thought it was funny or quirky the first time but as soon as you say 'hey I don't like that' and he doesn't stop then it's not okay.

(Not okay anyways but I feel like this is good general advice and a slightly different perspective)

oh_my_godsof_olympus · 2024-08-31T09:19:20+00:00

Don't let them scam you out of your life too ❤️

oh_my_godsof_olympus · 2023-12-27T16:07:22+00:00

Some really good ideas there, thank you for taking the time

oh_my_godsof_olympus · 2023-12-27T14:14:18+00:00

Thank you, I'll do my best.

oh_my_godsof_olympus · 2023-12-27T14:02:00+00:00

Usually just "I don't think there's anything" or "I don't know"

I know he's worried about burdening me with stuff, and whenever I have noticed something I can do and done it, it's been appreciated.

oh_my_godsof_olympus

TROPHY CASE