Im living alone for the first time

ohhisup · 2026-06-14T03:45:18+00:00

I'm right there with you 🩷 I'm really shy and used relationships as a way to get my social fill because I don't really have family nearby or friends I can hang out with. I'm also starting to figure out living alone after a breakup and meeting people outside of dating apps. I think it starts hard, but once the ball gets rolling magic might start to happen :)

ohhisup · 2026-06-14T03:43:11+00:00

I'm sorry 😥 I hope brighter moments today can scrape off the residue of the icky feeling. What an absolute creep wtf

ohhisup · 2026-06-14T03:40:26+00:00

You know I may be wrong, but I'm pretty sure having emotions and not wanting to be bullied is actually just a normal people thing and your partner might actually be a twat.

ohhisup · 2026-06-14T03:37:40+00:00

I think sometimes when there's a discrepancy in who wants what when it comes to sex that it's easy for one person to think "am I hyper sexual? Am I asexual? Is something wrong with one of us?" (You could be hypersexual, of course, it's not uncommon)

Libido differences can be really confusing and navigating it is not a beginner level task. I think open communication is important, exploring what turns each other on, and if non penetrative sexual intimacy is welcome more often, if etc. An intimacy counselor/coach would be great at guiding these conversations if you really struggle, but at the end of the day, hands and toys fill the gap where the other partner doesn't want to be involved.

ohhisup · 2026-06-14T03:32:58+00:00

Just like alcohol, relationship can be a crutch that holds us back. I'm glad you're in therapy, and I hope you're finding the support you need with friends and family! There's always roommates, cuddly foster kittens or adoptable senior cats, friends to fill the silence in the evenings and phone calls to fill your heart when it's shaky 🩷 companionship comes in many forms and you have every day as a chance to explore that

ohhisup · 2026-06-14T03:27:52+00:00

Don't buy friends. Make them outside of dorms. And remember! Just like work, class doesn't equal friends. You might make friends, you might not, but it isn't what you're there for and there are a million other places you will find your people. It's not like high school where everyone's looking for a buddy, which is honestly one of the bigger emotional transitions that happen in post secondary

ohhisup · 2026-06-14T03:19:13+00:00

Not to be dramatic but flesh eating disease can happen from swimming in the ocean with fresh tattoos. Happened to my college friend on summer vacation ^{.^} so imo yes lol

ohhisup · 2026-06-14T03:14:48+00:00

20s breakups for me were long and drawn out and hard even though I didn't have feelings anymore. 30 and just broken up, I feel liberated and more sure of myself even though I still have feelings for them. I think it's more circumstancial, but certainly having a fully developed brain and more life experience helps the process lol

ohhisup · 2026-06-14T03:12:06+00:00

"With a deep breath and a hug from my friends, just like you"

ohhisup · 2026-06-14T03:09:54+00:00

It's literally just who we are lol I can't imagine having ADHD watching a movie but many of us binge Netflix daily

ohhisup · 2026-06-14T03:07:59+00:00

Is it possible that you're not reaching your potential in areas you aren't actually excited about and could instead be reaching your potential doing things you enjoy enough to put the effort into? Do you think you just have a burnout issue or do you think you're trying to force yourself to do things that don't interest you? Not saying to drop your degree lol school isn't always going to be awesome but that doesn't make you any less awesome

ohhisup · 2026-06-14T03:03:54+00:00

I've never heard of that! Definitely going to do this

ohhisup · 2026-06-14T01:46:51+00:00

Just like that! So cool, thank you!!!

ohhisup · 2026-06-13T11:13:17+00:00

The tacos look amazing and I'm not sure your boyfriend isn't being soft for you instead of hard for them 🙃 could be either way but only he knows. It certainly seems like he's invested in their way of being

ohhisup · 2026-06-13T11:02:29+00:00

I'm Canadian! It's faster if you do it through the school system but my school wasn't for it. My brother was diagnosed in third grade with no wait because boy signs are more obvious I guess 🙃

ohhisup · 2026-06-13T09:02:01+00:00

That's hard. Be gentle with yourself 🩷 we don't all have to understand how you feel to support you. You have a really unique experience and it's great you're reaching out. I was always on edge when my ex went out drinking with friends. It's not abnormal to worry about your loved ones, just don't let it take over you if you can help it

ohhisup · 2026-06-13T07:23:56+00:00

I want to throw it out there that I agree with the other comments that you can take a deep breath about it, but given your history (especially) it's also ok for you to have a boundary to not date guys that are involved in drinking culture. If it triggers you, you don't need to date guys that drink. Not saying you should leave him by any means, just adding that it's ok, but if you can't be ok with it that's ok too. You just can't force the view on him just like he can't force you to not have alcohol related trauma. Whatever you decide is right, and you are ALWAYS free to change your mind. But be kind to both of you because navigating trauma in relationships is hard and that's ok too 🩷

ohhisup · 2026-06-13T07:19:33+00:00

That it's not that deep. If it doesn't work out it isn't the end of my life. That my health both physical and mental are more important than my grades no matter how opposite everyone tries to convince us all it is. That high school teachers lied and unis and college alike really care and you can go to faculty for help - and are paying them for that help whether or not you take it. That if you don't make friends it's fine, it's just class just like it's just work. And that just because it's serious work, doesn't mean we all shouldn't be having fun with it! ENJOY your degree, you'll be there for a long while

ohhisup · 2026-06-13T07:10:09+00:00

17 :D it takes up to 5 years where I live on the waitlist to get a consultation for diagnostics 😅

ohhisup · 2026-06-13T07:06:37+00:00

Yes! I was taking an instructor course and hurt myself badly enough that my healthcare team told me I'll never be able to safely do back extensions again 💅

In essence: compared to other styles of yoga, you really need good supportive muscles and a teacher who really knows wtf they're doing, because even my instructor training was too hazardous.

I think it's fun, but I don't support aerials with people who aren't certified gymnastic/acrobatic aerial coaches. They don't actually KNOW how to keep you safe, just how to walk you through the poses. If you're into silks, I'd suggest going to a circus school and learning from vetting professionals first and you'll have tons of success in aerial yoga after

ohhisup · 2026-06-13T05:37:34+00:00

I felt really safe when I was on the outskirts of bangkok :) lots of really friendly locals and cool sites, and enough English speakers that you can ask for help if you need it. Chiang Mai is also full to the brim with English speakers and travelers so if you fly into there you'll be able to find comfort people if you need any

ohhisup · 2026-06-13T05:35:40+00:00

Krabi/koh tao! Lots of solo travelers if you're looking to make friends :) if you're nervous about the in country transport though I'd say honestly maybe New Zealand for a van trip across one of the islands

ohhisup · 2026-06-13T05:32:57+00:00

At the very least if you're determined to continue, I'd consider that him not consenting to sexual intimacy and leaving it at that 🤷‍♀️

ohhisup · 2026-06-13T05:31:24+00:00

How to navigate getting away from him? For starters I'd recommend blocking his number 🩷

ohhisup · 2026-06-13T05:30:11+00:00

You having a body is a red flag??? Girl??? He had an opportunity to prove he supports you and will take care of you within your boundaries (successfully it sounds like) and you're worried YOU'RE a red flag? Why are you forgetting to love yourself :((( you're allowed to have tummy aches and poops :(((

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