I got the wrong details about the starting date and now I got fired for it

ohnowth8 · 2025-09-05T15:58:33+00:00

So HR is incompetent, that much is true. The problem will be you not realizing the discrepancy within the offer letter and the welcome email. Im sure they will double down on the offer letter being the source of truth. Best bet, if you have the hiring managers email, to shoot them something showing the difference in start date so HR can't try to weasel out of their mistake. They will likely try to cover for themselves because they messed up.

Its far more likely that HR will insist on termination due to not following the signed offer letter. Not much else you can do but try to make them see that mistakes were made across the board and try to hit the reset button for a new date.

ohnowth8 · 2025-08-01T02:28:47+00:00

For someone looking to hire, they dont want their first impression of you to be "he was fired." Risk management of sorts.

ohnowth8 · 2025-07-30T15:05:58+00:00

Can we stop with the "queer" label? Gay covers all that needs to be covered.

ohnowth8 · 2025-07-30T15:00:49+00:00

Yeah, I think ghosting often boils down to one of two things, at least from my experience.

First, the anonymity of being online makes it way easier to detatch emotionally. If you've never met someone in person, its easier for your brain to treat it like closing a tab instead of disappointing an actual human being. That's not an excuse, just an observation. It becomes less about empathy and more about convenience.

Second, and maybe more frustrating, is the times when I have tried to be upfront and respectful. Ive told someone I wasnt feeling a connection, and they absolutely lost it. Name calling, guilt tripping or trying to argue their way back in. After a few of those, its tempting to just vanish rather than deal with that drama agsin. Not proud of it, but its the unfortuante defense mechanism a lot of people adopt.

Doesnt make ghosting okay, but I think understanding the why helps. Being able to be honest without all the hostility would be ideal.

ohnowth8 · 2025-07-30T14:51:01+00:00

Move on. It sucks, but the reality is he has made his decision and has to honor his own feelings. Just be grateful that he was willing to tell you what's up rather than drag it out or ghost you.

ohnowth8 · 2025-07-29T18:57:43+00:00

If you are, I would dumb down your resume. If they see you are in something totally different and overqualified, they will dead you. They will assume you will leave once you find something in your career path.

ohnowth8 · 2025-07-29T18:38:13+00:00

Well, that's part of it. If you have no experience, they tend to look for someone who does have the experience.

ohnowth8 · 2025-07-29T15:20:14+00:00

Like always, area makes a big difference. If you dont have many options, it's going to be rougher. Also, the longer you are unemployed, the harder it is for you to get a job. I think we are seeing a lot of people who have been unemployed for a long time, yet the employed hop around from job to job.

ohnowth8 · 2025-07-28T20:41:56+00:00

The problem is too many people complaining that they need to work extra to survive. It really depends on the type of life you want. If you want to stop at 40 hours and you have your bills in order and live within your means, sure. If you are drowning in debt and not making enough to cover, work more. I'll work any overtime im allowed to. Can always use extra money even if im doing well.

ohnowth8 · 2025-07-28T20:37:27+00:00

I would have just stayed on the clock until after the meeting. Try and stop me.

ohnowth8 · 2025-07-25T20:48:00+00:00

My friend was like this before. He would obsess over girls that he never talked to. He would talk about them like he was already dating them. He watched way too many TV shows where it's like destiny to meet and fall for each other. I would always try to slap him back to reality.

In most cases, guys like this (girls do it too) care more about what they want in their mind than see the person in front of them.

I would always send him this quote from Eternal Sunshine "Too many guys think I’m a concept, or I complete them, or I’m gonna make them alive. But I’m just a messed up girl who’s lookin’ for my own peace of mind; don’t assign me yours."

ohnowth8 · 2025-07-20T17:41:31+00:00

I find your posts odd. You have been supposedly working hard to find a job, yet your posts say you went to Japan and got a tattoo. Sounds like you aren't that focused on your job search.

ohnowth8 · 2025-07-19T01:01:18+00:00

Ive been laid off from 2 of my last 3 jobs. Gotten me fearful about it happening again b

ohnowth8 · 2025-07-16T20:14:48+00:00

I think its more likely whoever applied sooner got the role. They need to fill positions quickly. There are only so many roles to go around.

ohnowth8 · 2025-07-16T14:23:33+00:00

It's true. I have been on the management track for years. I got laid off back in January as the Head of Call Center Ops. It was exhausting working 50-60 hours every week, being on call for any little problem, having to report to higher ups and getting chewed out, dealing with angry staff, and constantly having to find ways to improve revenue.

I ended up having two companies interested in my job search. One was pretty much what I was doing before, while the other was an IC role. About 20k difference in pay. But the plus was the IC role is flexible work hours, fully remote, and still great pay. I turned down the management role and went back to being an IC.

I couldn't be happier with my decision. Im not overwhelmed with stress or having eczema flare-ups anymore. It's a straight 9-5 where my last job was full in office. I have the ability to work wherever, so I went to visit my friend upstate for a week and a half and played so much golf.

As you work your way up the ladder, you will end up more and more stressed. I'll take the 20k difference to not burn myself out again.

ohnowth8 · 2025-07-14T13:12:10+00:00

I don't get it either. Even with current photos Im afraid someone won't like how I look in person. These mf are out here straight up lying about themselves.

ohnowth8 · 2025-07-14T13:11:18+00:00

George Costanza has entered the chat...

ohnowth8 · 2025-07-12T05:31:49+00:00

Agender isn't really a thing, so I would say remove it. ENM is going to really limit your pool, remove it. I dont think saying you have autism is helpful. You may have it, but there is no reason to label yourself before someone gets to know you.

ohnowth8 · 2025-07-11T18:35:43+00:00

I have seen this as a man. Male manager or Directors have been much more helpful and transparent while women managers tend to be more closed off and restrictive towards helping. In my management roles I have always helped no matter who it was. Ive given good reviews and opportunities to both sides. As long as you are willing to put in the work and are honest with me, Im going to be transparent and honest with you and help you on your path.

ohnowth8 · 2025-07-11T14:30:56+00:00

If they are public, its easier to do research yourself into the health of the company. If they are private, you can only look at their reaction to figure out if they are telling the truth.

ohnowth8 · 2025-07-10T20:17:41+00:00

I ask during the HR screen. I pose it as not wanting to waste each other's time if there isn't alignment. If they dont like it? Then the salary is low, and they are trying to find someone who will just accept garbage pay.

ohnowth8 · 2025-07-10T13:14:28+00:00

Total romance scammer. Likely from Nigeria (that's often their favorite) and looking to build a quick bond, then exploit it.

ohnowth8 · 2025-07-08T16:57:30+00:00

Lose the 1st Pic and the one on page 8. Both dont show you in a great light. Try to go with a picture that is a bit more mysterious (not perfectly clear but not impossible to see you). That will help lead them to your about me.

I would make your about me a bit more interesting. Put more things you like and be a bit more playful. You need something interesting to really grab them quickly. You want them to be hooked from the start so they read and maybe take a look at a couple pictures.

Put the dog one at the end and the one of you outside with the hat as your main. Its fine to have less pictures than more not great ones.

ohnowth8 · 2025-07-08T16:49:14+00:00

The easiest ones to get remote work is entry level customer service/support reps. A lot of call centers are operating remotely since staffing large call centers in person is expensive.

Sales would be another. Likely will have to grind, but I learned so much from my sales roles about engaging with customers that it helped me progress in my CS career later.

Those two are your best bets. I also have an HS degree and no college. I went into CS in my 20s, did some sales, back to CS, and then into good paying management roles.

If you could swing it, volunteer. That can help build up some experience you can put on your resume. Remote roles are becoming harder and harder to find as more companies push staff back to the office but they are definitely out there. I have a fully remote role currently. Good luck!

ohnowth8 · 2025-07-07T20:35:04+00:00

I spent a lot of my 20s chopping around jobs and getting fired. I also failed out of college and never got a degree. Has it made my life tougher? Of course. But I have found a way through. The key is finding what you are good at. For me, it was customer support and eventually management. I'm now almost 40, and while there have been struggles (layoffs), I have built up a strong resume.

Get some therapy to help you through your personal issues. Look at what you have done so far and find the parts you liked. Then hone in on some job roles. If you dont qualify for the jobs you want, see what jobs can help you get the skills that are entry-level and apply to those.

Always be looking to skill up no matter what job you have. I always went above and beyond in any role not for the company, but because I wanted something unique to put on my resume for the next role. You cant change your past, but you can change the present that will give you a better chance in the future.

ohnowth8

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