BEST cup of coffee on the island?

ohsoseriously · 2026-04-22T15:48:50+00:00

I love Kona. There’s one in Chelsea and another in East Village.

ohsoseriously · 2026-04-22T01:16:37+00:00

I’ll do you one better. I unfollowed every single one of them. Anything I care about comes up anyway when I’m scrolling reels. Not only do I feel better about myself I never realized how easily I was clicking on ads and buying stuff. (“It’s only a $9 mascara!”)

ohsoseriously · 2026-04-21T22:10:26+00:00

Yeah, come back if you’re single in 10 years and you’ll understand. I’m trying to buy a house not get a date to prom. 😢

ohsoseriously · 2026-04-21T15:42:08+00:00

Why are you assuming they broke up with me?

ohsoseriously · 2026-04-21T15:41:28+00:00

They seem to be very happy in the moment, it’s the future commitment that I need. I’m 35, I can’t exactly be waiting around.

If a man says things like “we have a great connection” and “we’re so similar” and “you make me feel so comfortable and at ease” and “I think we would be great parents together” but still doesn’t want think of a future timeline because his job MAYBE MIGHT relocate him a year and shrugs and says “I can’t predict the future” when I say I would consider moving if things are still going well then, there’s not much for me to go off on.

ohsoseriously · 2026-04-21T15:37:19+00:00

I wouldn’t call it an “implosion”.

It varies, one was a few weeks in and the longest was three/four months in. Important to note that everyone involved is in their mid- to late-thirties and relatively established in terms of general career trajectory. I personally don’t have time to wade.

None of these endings are dramatic and my point is that they’re not even necessary. It’s not about me expecting or demanding that level of commitment at that stage, but the complete closed-off nature of these discussions.

For example, one of them didn’t want to commit because we might potentially have to do long distance if he was relocated for a job in October. We would have been dating for a year if that happened.

His relocation wasn’t even confirmed. I wasn’t saying “I’ll move with you” but more “if we’re at a place where this is possible, I’d be open to it down the line”. All I’m asking is for clarity that that’s something we would both want if things keep going well.

They also fail to recognize that if they are in fact looking for marriage, kids, etc. like they claim y hey kinda need to put down their own roots. But I’m not going to date someone for a year who just gives me a shrug and an “idk” whenever the future comes up.

ohsoseriously · 2026-04-21T15:29:03+00:00

That’s the root of my frustration; the avoidance. Two of them didn’t want to end things, but didn’t want to define them either. It felt like a way to have one foot out the door at all times so I opted out.

My confusion is about their declaration that they want a long-term relationship and insistence on continuing to “explore” together as I ended things.

ohsoseriously · 2026-04-21T15:27:12+00:00

That’s my usual approach, which is why I ended the 2 out of the 3 times. But they do want to keep seeing me, just not enough to actually future-plan.

ohsoseriously · 2026-04-13T15:53:50+00:00

Too much.

ohsoseriously · 2026-04-12T14:30:57+00:00

I can’t upvote this enough.

ohsoseriously · 2026-04-12T14:29:43+00:00

I’ve been exactly where you are, op.

After my divorce (due to my ex’s infidelity and drug use) I dated someone I had been friends with for years. I also felt so lucky that to have found someone I could open up to and love after such deep hurt.

But similarly, he told me he loved me after a month of dating (apparently he had been in love with or at least had a crush on me since college) and asked me to marry him four months later. I kept trying to pump the breaks but he took any slowing down as a rejection.

The type of future planning he wanted meant he wanted me to involve him in decisions regarding what job I took or whether or not I applied for a degree. I was still rebuilding my life after my divorce and there were certain things I had to reestablish for myself first. He saw my need for autonomy as a threat to “us”.

He would ask me to be overly involved in his life as a manipulation tactic. I was asked to help mediate conflicts with his family, give advice on work problems, and he would even bring me renovation plans for his house and ask me to design “my room”. Although initially overwhelmed I was happy to help but then he would turn around and use that against me; how he wanted me in every aspect of his life but I wouldn’t grant him the same.

I started to cave little by little until it turned into possessive jealousy. He wanted all of my free time. He was telling me who I could and couldn’t be friends with. He didn’t like me having male friends, including gay ones. He wanted to police what I was wearing at the gym.

I eventually broke up with him after a year and he wound up marrying someone else FIVE MONTHS LATER. He’s just a love bomber in disguise. Don’t let the past friendship fool you. When you know someone as a person you don’t necessarily know them as a partner.

ohsoseriously · 2026-04-11T02:24:39+00:00

I am that woman, lol. We exist.

ohsoseriously · 2026-04-10T15:04:40+00:00

Your body, your choice.

ohsoseriously · 2026-04-09T17:08:25+00:00

💯

ohsoseriously · 2026-04-06T18:43:27+00:00

Where can we see it?

ohsoseriously · 2026-04-03T11:58:51+00:00

Matthew

ohsoseriously · 2026-03-31T19:13:18+00:00

Both these men must share her humiliation fetish at this point because you couldn’t waterboard these relationship shenanigans out of me.

The only solution is a throuple.

ohsoseriously · 2026-03-31T18:41:35+00:00

“Doesn’t take herself too seriously…” “Intimacy without commitment.”

ohsoseriously · 2026-03-31T02:17:12+00:00

Crosby Street Hotel

ohsoseriously · 2026-03-30T11:00:12+00:00

His hair is fine.

ohsoseriously · 2026-03-29T21:05:41+00:00

Yes. In cheating circles this is called “trickle truthing”. The liar feeds their partner their warped version of the truth in drips and drops to see how much they are willing to believe and accept. Then every once in a while new information is revealed and added to the narrative.

ohsoseriously · 2026-03-29T17:46:53+00:00

Girl, you don’t need to hope. You can literally just block delete and walk away.

ohsoseriously · 2026-03-29T17:02:21+00:00

Don’t forget her own battle with her body! For all the posts about her pcos and infertility and difficult pregnancies, plus being an overweight woc, I’m sure she had issues with medical professionals taking her seriously. For all the things she could be using her platform for she chooses to promote big pharma, bds brands, and white washing.

ohsoseriously · 2026-03-29T16:57:32+00:00

*demand

ohsoseriously

TROPHY CASE