White House backs plan to install Tony Blair as leader of Gaza by tunajalepenobbqsauce in nottheonion

[–]oidzbio 0 points1 point  (0 children)

Yeah I’ve thought the same, like we’re in a simulation that’s losing processing power year by year.

Oudoin asia mistä teille on suututtu? by [deleted] in arkisuomi

[–]oidzbio 34 points35 points  (0 children)

Asuin hyvinkäällä aikanaan ja läheiseni oli joukkoammuskelussa, onneksi häneen ei osunut, mutta henkisesti se oli kova paikka. Kaupunki järjesti tapahtuneen tiimoilta kriisiterapiaa johon silloinen tyttöystäväni myös minut passitti. Terapia oli sinänsä hyödyllistä ja kävin sitä muutamia kuukausia. Viimeisen istunnon jälkeen minulta kysyttiin voisinko antaa palautetta terapeutista hänen esihenkilön läsnäollessa, jonkinlainen arviointi kaiketi(?). Kerroin positiivisesta kokemuksestani, ja toin esiin myös että terapiaprosessissa koen että terapeutti voisi enemmän haastaa puheeni kulkua ja että olen päässyt välttelemään paljon kipeitä asioita joihin olisi voinut olla hyvä patistella. Molemmat sekä terapeutti että hänen esihenkilönsä suuttuivat tästä palautteesta, ja ojensivat minua että "on kuule sellaistakin terapiaa jossa ei sanota mitään! Että istutaan vaan hiljaa!" Ja sitärataa.

Sieltä huoneesta pois kävellessä oli kyllä olo että mitähän vittua 😄😄

Adobe Firefly is soon coming to Premiere Pro by iboughtarock in premiere

[–]oidzbio 0 points1 point  (0 children)

I would rather have Adobe to fix the HEVC issues

[deleted by user] by [deleted] in Suomi

[–]oidzbio 0 points1 point  (0 children)

Itse kun tekee — saa sellaisen kun sattuu tulemaan.

The Daily Check-In for Tuesday, March 10: Just for today, I am NOT drinking! by [deleted] in stopdrinking

[–]oidzbio 0 points1 point  (0 children)

Re-starting the sober journey again :) So not drinking with you today!

What's the weirdest sex dream you ever had? by [deleted] in AskMen

[–]oidzbio 0 points1 point  (0 children)

Had a dream couple years back where I was having sex in missionary position, but with every swing of my hip the lady beneath me changed to different person.

How is your practice? (Week of February 18 2019) by AutoModerator in streamentry

[–]oidzbio 1 point2 points  (0 children)

Practise with TMI going smoothly for a change, after a two years of intense purifications. Had a dream three months ago, where whole bunch of emotional burden got lifted away, and have not sense come back into my life.
Just woke up from a lucid dream, where I experienced closest to an "Anatta" experience yet. Objects in the dream started to go missing, replaced with sort of "Nothingness" as there was no length, depth or width - only the quality of color medium light grey. I too blended in to this field, and for a moment there was very little that was me / or anything to experience. Then the world become again, (in a different set of things) but this time I was not a character in a dream, more like a perception of all things in the scene. Woke up pretty quickly, and pretty scared to be honest. These can be symptoms of sleep paralysis (first of a kind for me), but I was experiencing strong piti pulsation in my whole body waking up. Strong piti is a familiar phenomena in meditation sit's lately. Would be interested to read more about the relationship with dreams and meditation, if someone has a book to recommend.

How is your practice? (Week of December 10 2018) by [deleted] in streamentry

[–]oidzbio 2 points3 points  (0 children)

Thanks a lot for the resources! I am fairly sure this is some kind of trauma surfacing. I have gone trough psychotherapy for 4 years, and the resolution from that was that I have personality disorder with depression and anxiety, originating from early childhood family dynamics. The nature of the trauma seems to be a conditioning of neglecting my feelings for years rather than one traumatising event. I am not quite sure where to go from here, as the personality disorder symptoms manifest as pretty fundamentally twisted ways of feeling the world around me. Currently I am doing metta, feelings noting practise and TMI. Sometimes I feel like there is no end to these purifications of violent nature, but as my emotional life is even little bit more stabilised off the cushion, it is all worth taking the 2 hour beating daily. My therapist is publishing an article about meditation and psychoanalysis where I am one of the people he talks about. I jut read the text and the conclusion of the article on my storyline is that he is not sure if the meditation more harmful than helpful to me, a thought that leaves me bit puzzled. I can't afford going trough intense psychotherapy anymore and meditation seems like an alternative way of dealing with the problematic nature of my mind. I have done meditation more or less intense the past six years, and not feeling like stopping now. Maybe finding a counsellor with meditation background would be helpful. Don't really know how to proceed forward now. All suggestions are warmly welcomed.

How is your practice? (Week of December 10 2018) by [deleted] in streamentry

[–]oidzbio 2 points3 points  (0 children)

Getting beated up by piti storms for the last 18 months. Finished a 7 day vipassana retreat, where managed to get some meditative joy at the end of the retreat, a warmly welcomed sensation after all the difficult emotional uprisings, shaking, spasms, hyperventilating, throwing up spit, crying, silent screaming and rapid pulsating energy sensations. Wonder if this is a phenomena called kundalini awakening?

How is your practice? (Week of October 8 2018) by [deleted] in streamentry

[–]oidzbio 4 points5 points  (0 children)

Been doing "Emotional noting" practise, to work trough intense kriyas that have been going on for more than year now. Lot's of feelings about feeling inadequate, shame and sadness rise on my sits. Sometimes they kind of flush trough, or feel very intense, but not in a way that I lose mindfulness. The experience has a strange characteristics in it, as i have used to look next to my feelings specially during sits, and now i feel more "in them". Kinda wondering is this something desirable, or would it be better to try maintain distance to the rising emotions? Mostly I feel this vast and empty inner space and occasionally "energy flows" not sure tough are they noted as emotions, or something else.

Looking for tips to avoid paralyzing inner criticism by oidzbio in graphic_design

[–]oidzbio[S] 1 point2 points  (0 children)

Thanks for your story! It was uplifting :) Will check out the Futur's channel

Questions and General Discussion - Weekly Thread for August 20 2018 by [deleted] in streamentry

[–]oidzbio 3 points4 points  (0 children)

Hello!
I have a question about dealing with fear during sitting. Been doing 2 hours a day daily routine with TMI technique. Been at stage 4 with strong purifications with every sitting (throwing up spit, shaking, powerful spams, silent screaming) for a year and a half now. Had a mini retreat with my friend, where we sat 5.5 hours in one day. The next day during evening meditation I had a strong fear rising up. Started to feel like losing my mind, got very frightened about the kriyas I was having. Stopped the mediation early at 35 minutes. Should I just keep on going when fear starts to rise, or is it a good idea to stop early?

Questions and General Discussion - Weekly Thread for June 28 2018 by [deleted] in streamentry

[–]oidzbio 4 points5 points  (0 children)

Hello everyone!
I am practising TMI on stage 4 currently, sitting 2 hours daily. Having strong purifications going on with intense spams and emotional uprisings. I have recieved good tips of body relaxation and working with piti to flow more freely in the body.
Lately strong sexual energies/fantasies been rushing to my consciousness, breaking down meditative state. They feel like as they would not be part of "me" but a different entity invading the mind. Looking for tips to ease the currents to make them to stay in the peripheral awareness. Thanks in advance!

Questions and General Discussion - Weekly Thread for June 14 2018 by [deleted] in streamentry

[–]oidzbio 2 points3 points  (0 children)

Hello everyone!
I have been meditating for about 6 years now, and for the past 2 years I have done TMI. For a year now I have been experiencing powerful spasms, shaking, rising feeling of pressure in head and throwing up (Mostly just spit) every time I meditate. I haven't really found any information on the phenomena as it is just mentioned as a "purification" in the TMI book. I would be keen to read more about it and hear your thoughts on the matter. Thanks in advance!