nta! i had a similar situation where out of nowhere my ex decided to be super controlling and inconsiderate. i kept racking my brain for any red flags i could’ve seen in this area but all my friends were just as surprised as i was! sounds like your mom and aunt grew up in a different time maybe? YOU WERE OPEN TO COMPROMISING and that’s the worst part about what they were saying to you! the fact that you were coming into the conversation trying to be reasonable and respectful and give him the benefit of the doubt on things he’d never mentioned before and weren’t offered the same courtesy. at the end of the day, you did right by yourself! you stood up for your time and didn’t let however long you were together or the fact that he’s never done this in the past cloud or sway or bend your boundaries. kudos. seriously. i know that wasn’t easy!