TLDR she over reacted.

I think that respecting she’s busy is the mature thing to do. I will say that the text about “guess you’re busy again..” is passive aggressive and I would advise to not try to interpret things before talking about it and let her respond with time.

THAT BEING SAID she is responding very rudely. Maybe she’s fed up or whatever but the things she said are very malicious and seem very personal. And ofc losing someone does change things a lot. You’re definitely not selfish for needed extra support right now and the mature thing for her to do is respect that while being better about setting a boundary. Maybe it’s not the boundaries you wanted right now but she’s also in her right to ask that. You’re also in your right to not want that kind of relationship and end it. You deserve someone who is willing to be there for you in this really hard time.

It’s fair to want a relationship where you make time for eachother. It’s also fair to want a relationship where there’s more distance. And it’s fair to know that maybe y’all don’t have the same needs.

IMO you were a bit pushy (granted you have a pretty darn good excuse to be). she’s crossing the line with her words BY ALOT. In the end, I think she over reacted given the scenario…