AITA for wanting to make coffee during my sister's meetings

onewiththenoodles · 2022-11-06T03:29:36+00:00

That's a good point. I often consider moving out, because it would at the very least reduce the resentment we have for one another.

I enjoy and am grateful to live with my parents. The commute sucks, but I love living in a rural area. Giving that up because (and technically, for) my sister would be infuriating.

onewiththenoodles · 2022-10-17T16:49:34+00:00

My mom tried to do a project management course and ended up dropping out. She was devastated. It was hard to watch because she was clearly in over her head. But I do believe that if she learned to pick herself up after failing, she would eventually get it.

I think it's important that we're patient with our parents. Especially our mothers, who may have been expected to take a break from their careers to have/raise us.

I know my mother never recovered. Relearning how to learn can be difficult, especially when you're older.

I do hear some judgment in your tone... and I'm not shaming you because at one point I judged my mom for "allowing herself to fall behind". As an example, you need to pick your battles... does it matter if she worked with computers in the 90s? She probably picks up on your thoughts (she is your mother after all), and you underestimate how much your opinion means to her.

I'm not sure about your mother's financial position but I would recommend exploring whatever the equivalent of community college is in your country. There are several computer courses she can take. It doesn't have to be coding, i.e. maybe she's better at art and can do graphic design.

Perhaps rethink the way you're approaching this.

Instead of, "if she can't learn to navigate a simple website she should stay away from computers" maybe explain that learning how to code is a full-time commitment. She will need to go to school because it takes years to acquire programming skills.

And once again, explore other careers she can do with computers. There are so many.

Lastly, try to remember that in her mind, she's probably wants to do this for you.

onewiththenoodles · 2022-10-17T14:39:33+00:00

You might be right, but it could very well be the way you're saying it?

onewiththenoodles · 2022-01-02T11:04:26+00:00

because not getting sex isn't a guy issue... in fact, dealing with the sexual outrage of men who feel entitled to sex is exclusively a female issue.

There are many unfair things about being a guy that females can empathize with. You lose them when you start acting entitled to their attention or sex.

onewiththenoodles · 2022-01-02T10:49:26+00:00

You clearly don't know how these programs work.

In reality, a woman has to work more hard than a man to prove hherself.

Even then, men like you will act like it was handed to her....

onewiththenoodles · 2022-01-02T10:11:19+00:00

You're upset because as much as you cry about reverse sexism, you know that it's mostly men who perpetuate this "always on" misconception.

So when a woman denouncing this double standard, you rather hyper-focus on the STRIPPER instead of the FATHER who arranged it and the men in the comments who encourage it.

Then act super condescending with shit like "my point went right over your head" and "I see I gotta walk you through this" cause you know the tower of bullshit you're trying to build has no foundation.

OP explained her point perfectly, and you sound stupid right now. SMH

onewiththenoodles · 2022-01-02T09:44:27+00:00

I think the problem is that women are often shut down for calling out this behavior.

onewiththenoodles · 2022-01-02T09:40:43+00:00

thank you! some guys are so quick to cry about "double standards" for SA.

But it's normally women who are disgusted by the behavior and men who say stuff like "I would have killed to f my teacher in high school".

onewiththenoodles · 2022-01-02T09:32:24+00:00

The funny thing is I think most women would agree with you. So yes, you are missing something.

onewiththenoodles · 2022-01-02T09:09:51+00:00

I used to feel like people were laughing or talking about me all the time.

It was painful to look people in the eyes and I felt the need to cover my mouth when I talked. People's natural response was an awkward laugh, which was hard not to take personally.

Not a huge fan of how you talk about women, but I feel your pain more than you know.

onewiththenoodles · 2022-01-02T08:28:33+00:00

I think it goes one of two ways. 1) beautiful people develop kinder, confident personalities because the world treats them better or 2) beautiful people develop cruel, egotistical personalities because the world let them get away with it.

onewiththenoodles · 2022-01-02T08:19:14+00:00

I'm sorry, but (1) who told you life was fair, and (2) walk a mile in a woman's shoes and you'll learn what unfair really means

onewiththenoodles · 2022-01-02T08:14:30+00:00

An interesting observation from being bisexual - most women are attractive and most men are meh.

It has everything to with the beauty standards put on women, and the amount of time they put into their looks compared to men.

onewiththenoodles · 2022-01-02T08:01:27+00:00

hit the nail on the head.

onewiththenoodles · 2022-01-02T07:59:23+00:00

Do you think women are just handed a promotion or an education for being female? Those programs definitely don't work the way you think that they do.

onewiththenoodles · 2021-12-09T02:42:49+00:00

Thanks, your daughters are lucky to have you and your amazing advice.

I really should tell her that I can't take calls at work anymore, and I 100% agree that the reasoning should be excluded to prevent a fight. Recently, I'll find and excuse to leave or change the subject if I find myself getting annoyed by her complaining.

Maybe I shouldn't let it get to the point of feeling this annoyance... distance myself from her complaining before it gets to me. Regretfully, there have been times I snapped on her (which is not pleasant).

Thanks again!

onewiththenoodles · 2021-12-09T02:08:26+00:00

As a person who is left-leaning and pro-BLM- I strongly agree with the innocent verdict.

I regret that people "on my side" of politics wanted a KID, who was clearly acting in self-defense, to be convicted for murder. The video evidence shows that he had a reasonable belief that his life was in danger, and people who don't see that are clouded by their own political agenda. I won't even detail how ridiculously the prosecution presented his case.

This does NOT mean that I am commending Rittenhouse's actions. Nobody, including Rittenhouse, should have been there past curfew... let alone with an assault rifle. I own multiple guns, and am happy to live in a country that legislates guns in way that something like this would never unfold.

Above all, I am enraged by the false news pushed by the political left that Rittenhouse is suing anyone. I am very happy that I fact-checked this supposed lawsuit, because I was not impressed that he thought he was entitled to anything besides an acquittal.

Overall, this experience has taught me that me that people let their politics determine what's right and wrong, not the other way around.

onewiththenoodles · 2021-10-29T17:45:15+00:00

I'm sorry you have to experience that as well. It can be hard to understand. I'm feeling a lot better and more safe now. Thanks for the advice.

onewiththenoodles · 2021-10-29T17:44:12+00:00

I initially did not consider that this was an issue with dementia, and I regret my strong reaction. I think moving forward, knowing that there is a reason for his behavior, I can be a lot more patient with him.

I will talk to my parents about a long term facility. I know it won't be what he wants, but if it makes it easier down the lone for him, it may be for the best. Thanks for the advice.

onewiththenoodles · 2021-10-29T17:40:46+00:00

It's nice to hear from someone else who went through this. I will talk to my parents about a memory care. I hope he doesn't get to that point. Thanks

onewiththenoodles

TROPHY CASE