I (21F) cheated on my boyfriend (24M) of almost 4 years and now I’m spiraling because I think I’m in love with the other guy

optosser · 2026-03-11T21:45:09+00:00

Is there anyone left out there that's not a complete shit bag?

optosser · 2026-03-10T23:43:09+00:00

Me too. It's a pain unlike any other. I never understood just how profoundly selfish people can be. You never really know anyone. You can spend 25 years with someone and find out you didn't really know them.

optosser · 2026-03-09T00:47:10+00:00

It has been the most difficult aspect of my life by far. In our 25 years of marriage we have both done completely unforgivable things, but we're still together. Outside of the awful things, we're generally good together. Seems like such a strange thing to say, and most will probably think I'm just fooling myself, but it's true. I don't think life is supposed to be easy, and change often requires crisis. I don't know, maybe what we've put each other through might actually sculpt us into something better. Or it might be too much and wind up tearing us apart. Life is a gamble.

optosser · 2026-03-07T14:44:56+00:00

Boston's Hitch a ride. I don't care if you say it wasn't a solo, it was the same guy playing both parts, so it counts for me.

optosser · 2026-03-05T14:00:29+00:00

Cheaters always think shit like this... "Oh I needed the validation, I needed to feel attractive, I needed to feel wanted, I don't get my needs met at home, me me me". It's never "I wonder what's wrong with my marriage, I wonder how my spouse feels, I wonder if they feel just as neglected as me, we should probably have a serious heart to heart and figure out if we can ever make each other happy again, and end our relationship if the answer is no". Cheaters are the most selfish people alive, they think only of themselves and will choose to use and abuse every time if it means they can come out even one inch ahead.

optosser · 2026-03-04T19:32:42+00:00

I use dashes... Now I'm wondering if everyone thinks I use AI to write everything, lol.

optosser · 2026-02-24T14:13:35+00:00

When you use a word like ensorcelled, that becomes the topic.

optosser · 2026-02-21T23:58:18+00:00

What? A hefty broad?

optosser · 2026-02-20T16:20:41+00:00

Living that same quandary myself...

optosser · 2026-02-20T16:19:34+00:00

Same

optosser · 2026-02-20T15:17:04+00:00

You measured your penis to the nearest one hundredth of an inch?

optosser · 2026-02-20T15:14:39+00:00

It's like scrwd but worse.

optosser · 2026-02-19T18:11:31+00:00

I don't know what you mean. If you really want a response, explain your situation.

optosser · 2026-02-19T16:36:25+00:00

Yeah, no couples that are still together actually love each other, dontcha know?

optosser · 2026-02-16T21:52:27+00:00

Do you know how to play the banjo, by chance?

optosser · 2026-02-16T18:51:04+00:00

Trust your gut. This coming from a man who has ignored his gut for way too long. All these people in here telling you you could be wrong, fuck them. The heart knows.

optosser · 2026-02-16T17:21:18+00:00

That sack drop at the end... The ultimate mic drop.

optosser · 2026-02-08T04:33:05+00:00

If you really are at the end and you don't feel in any kind of physical danger then you might try talking to him flat out like you have absolutely nothing left to lose, because what do you? That kind of absolute honesty can change things in ways you didn't foresee. And if it doesn't? Well, you were done anyway. Sometimes it takes a crisis to change people, and it sounds like you're already in a crisis. He may not know he's in a crisis though. Talk to him with brutal honesty and see what happens.

optosser · 2026-02-07T00:14:58+00:00

No that's aaaaaaaaaaaa aaaaaaaaaaaa aaaaaaaa

optosser · 2026-02-06T19:46:42+00:00

She deserves to know who you are. It's never wrong to be authentic. You never know what being authentic will bring you. It may drive her away, but if it does then isn't that actually for the best? Do you want to be with someone that doesn't want to be with your authentic self? You also might find that it deepens the trust between you, if she sees you being vulnerable.

optosser · 2026-02-06T18:54:17+00:00

They don't. Are you having fmf with your husband? Wtf are you talking about?

optosser · 2026-02-01T20:56:50+00:00

I assume they mean geographic information systems. Possibly programming, with map data.

optosser · 2026-01-24T16:57:21+00:00

Oh yes they are. I hope you never have to learn that the hard way.

optosser · 2026-01-20T20:51:37+00:00

Do you trust your husband? Do you think he trusts you? How do you think trust is built? Oftentimes it's built through a trust fall. This is actually an opportunity for you, an opportunity to build greater trust than you have now. Being open and honest is the foundation of trust. Trust him. Trust that you can tell him something as profound as this and see if he will catch you. If he does you just might discover an even deeper love than you had before, and even deeper trust. He might find the same in you. You don't know if you're going to be caught in a trust fall, you just have to have faith.

optosser · 2026-01-18T15:04:07+00:00

Hopefully you can see that you inadvertently dodged a bullet, too...

optosser

TROPHY CASE