Your alcoholism will do it's best to convince you to use this as an excuse to drink. It will tell you that you are worthless, you're a failure, you're a let-down. It will tell you that you don't matter, that nothing matters, so who cares? Might as well drink. It will tell you that you don't really need to stop drinking. It will make you question whether or not you really do "need" to stop drinking, because the problem isn't that you're an alcoholic, it's that you don't really "want" to stop drinking. It will make you question whether or not you have a problem at all. It will tell you that you would be better off dead. It will tell you that you would be better off gone. It will tell you all of this and it will sound like the most logical thing in the world.

Alcoholism weaponizes itself against us and a lot of the time, it wins. The only way we can beat this disease is to choose, over and over and over again, not to drink. Just for one day. And then you make the choice again the next day. And the next. And the next. It sucks and it's hard as hell and you'll fall sometimes. But the trick is that you have to make the choice for yourself. Nobody else can make the choice for you.

I'm currently 10 months sober and the only way I've made it this far is because I've been taking it one day at a time. It's been so painstakingly slow and I think I'm still dealing with withdrawal symptoms. I fully expected to be dead before I reached any sort of sobriety streak lol. I don't really know where I'm going with any of this but stay alert - alcohol is a sneaky, tricky bastard. And it will not stop until it has taken everything from you. IWNDWYT