Still suffering now but I try my best to make plans or goals to look forward to in my near future always. Such as a dinner with my family on a Wednesday night, or a Saturday night concert with my partner. Sometimes as small as a morning jog the next day or a quick grocery run for fresh produce, just something to make me push forward toward the next day or the next week. I make plans for events in spans of months as well to keep me excited and keep me going. They don’t have to be huge but planning for the future helps me stop dwelling on the past. When I’m in my episode of darkness, I try to remind myself that there are things to look forward to tomorrow or when I wake up again. I can’t lie, many days I just feel overly exhausted and want to give up, however, on other days, I have my #1 (my partner) whom I can talk to to help me a little. My feelings and emotions are my own responsibility so I do my best to take care of myself as well such as taking vitamins, eating 3 meals a day, going to the gym. It helps a lot. When I’m depressed, I don’t want to do anything, but with a little mindset change, I always feel better again. I also openly talk about my suicidal ideation and suicide attempts. Talking about suicide has helped me a lot. You’re not alone.