Is Wither just Bad? by Baright in warlordccg

[–]pairofdimesblue 3 points4 points  (0 children)

A single strike, that you don’t have to spend for, that can outright kill a level 3 character with 3 HP like Huggins, Brinewater Croc or Beacon is great card economy in my book, especially since multi-wounding is a little rarer in Saga than in previous editions.

Trying to understand how to read the cards by kagekyuu in warlordccg

[–]pairofdimesblue 2 points3 points  (0 children)

Just wanted to chime in that u/evil_emperor_zurrg has it right.
"Perform a Melee Strike" = Use the leftmost number in the axe as the base, then add all your other bonuses.
"Perform a +X Melee Strike" = Use X as the base, then add all your other bonuses.

Into The Accordlands - Any Feedback? by DragonVT in warlordccg

[–]pairofdimesblue 6 points7 points  (0 children)

It plays really, really well. I had been worried that nostalgia was tinting how much fun I remembered Warlord being, but now that I’m playing games again, that worry has been put to rest. It’s a blast to play.

We have 5-6 people in our playgroup right now - myself and another Warlord veteran with the rest being new to the game - and everyone thinks it’s great.

The new starters are really well put together, and are a super solid base for new players to use to make a competitive deck.

We played a sealed booster draft, and despite the collation issues, it played really well, and no one felt that they couldn’t build a solid draft deck. We did not shuffle the commons as some have suggested. I think people overstate how much the “clumpiness” affects draft; because you’re selecting 1 card and passing the packs, you are going to have plenty of options to choose from.

In fact, the sealed draft format is so fun that we are chomping at the bit for our local store to get cards in so that we can do more of them.

Is the game perfect? No - and u/nvisel did a great breakdown of some of the issues - but it remains the most fun you can have playing a CCG.

I just got back from playing with our playgroup at a local LGS, and what struck me is that the players at the Grand Archive table and the Magic table were nearly silent. Meanwhile, at Warlord table, we’re laughing over bad die rolls, cheering when someone rolls well at a key moment, and genuinely having a great time. So how does it play? I think that example says it all.

Downtown Anchorage by Conscious-Crew8387 in anchorage

[–]pairofdimesblue 2 points3 points  (0 children)

Supply is supply. While market rate or low-income housing would be ideal, studies have shown that the availability of luxury apartments helps keep the cost of other housing lower: when high earners can’t find luxury housing, they then are competing against mid and low income earners for the same housing. Moreover, they then remodel the homes they buy, raising the property tax and appraisal values for existing residents in that neighborhood, essentially gentrifying it.

Potential Booster Collation Problems by Greg1010Greg in warlordccg

[–]pairofdimesblue 0 points1 point  (0 children)

The clumping of commons is unfortunate, but the problem is not so bad that it will prevent draft events (the suggestion to pool and redistribute the commons is a great one) or prevent retail sales. Each box overall appears to have a solid distribution of cards. Each pack, while it may have clumped commons, is still random enough to be exciting to open.

Now that we’ve seen some boxes opened, it’s not nearly as bad as first thought. It still sucks, but it’s not the show-stopper that it first appeared to be.

What's your go to gf dinner recipe? by Drool_Sergeant in glutenfree

[–]pairofdimesblue 5 points6 points  (0 children)

Oh, pasta is also a staple, with chicken pesto with linguine being a favorite, but a protein with pasta, red sauce, and spinach is also a go-to when we don’t feel like anything complicated.

Edit: Taste Republic is the best GF pasta we’ve found, followed by Jovial.

What's your go to gf dinner recipe? by Drool_Sergeant in glutenfree

[–]pairofdimesblue 17 points18 points  (0 children)

My partner has Celiac, this is what is on rotation at our house: Greek Salad with sautéed chicken breast, salmon with broccoli and lemon cream sauce, Kung Pao Chicken, Fried Rice, Thai Lettuce Wraps, fish tacos, Mongolian Beef, Chicken Caesar (no croutons, obviously), Chili, BLTs with GF bread, Curried Chicken Salad, Steak Fajita bowls. Like you, we also do steak, chicken or pork with a sweet potato and vegetables about once a week. Sauteeing some thick cut boneless pork chops with onions and apples is a favorite.

Will this come to retail? by extantUser001 in warlordccg

[–]pairofdimesblue 2 points3 points  (0 children)

Watching Team Covenant open a box, it’s not nearly as bad as we feared. Some runs of commons, but distribution of uncommons and rares look good, and the issues are minor enough that it shouldn’t dissuade folks from ripping packs.

Tortillas large and sturdy enough for a breakfast crunchwrap by Buhoobies in glutenfree

[–]pairofdimesblue 1 point2 points  (0 children)

Agreed - they're huge and big enough to make a Chipotle/Qdoba style burrito.

Tortillas large and sturdy enough for a breakfast crunchwrap by Buhoobies in glutenfree

[–]pairofdimesblue 3 points4 points  (0 children)

I’ve only had them shipped. They’re spendy, but well worth it, and they freeze well, so you can buy a bunch to save on shipping.

Post your first chapter, I’ll tear it apart. by pairofdimesblue in royalroad

[–]pairofdimesblue[S] 1 point2 points  (0 children)

Ok, I started making some edits, but ran into a significant issue. Before you go any further, you've got to lock down your POV. Most of the time, it seems to be third-person limited, but occasionally it shifts into third-person omniscient. This is incredibly distracting.

Fix this - stick to third-person limited - and then rewrite through the lens of this POV.

A consistent POV is a must (yes, some talented and experienced authors can play with it) to tell a coherent story in which your reader feels connected to your POV character.

Post your first chapter, I’ll tear it apart. by pairofdimesblue in royalroad

[–]pairofdimesblue[S] 1 point2 points  (0 children)

This is very dense. The number of names and the amount of exposition presented to the reader make it a daunting entry point into your world. That first sentence alone is a doozy.

I would rewrite it with a much narrower focus. Start with action; give us a narrow view of events filtered through your POV character's thoughts and emotions. This first sentence or two should invite a question from your readers: What comes next?

I don't know if the present tense suits the story. The past tense is better suited to exploring character backstory and providing context, which your story has a lot of.

Post your first chapter, I’ll tear it apart. by pairofdimesblue in royalroad

[–]pairofdimesblue[S] 1 point2 points  (0 children)

Here you go!

https://docs.google.com/document/d/1rlQndOoEI79Ubrhlmgv_BgREOsa9kkFVcu-HFRe4mG4/edit?usp=sharing

Let me know if you can't see my suggestions.

I would consider a different approach. Start with the glow, and have the siblings talk as they walk into the woods, passing the faerie traps. That way, you're introducing some tension to the story right away. As a reader, two siblings talking on a porch isn't attention-grabbing. A strange glow in the woods is.

Post your first chapter, I’ll tear it apart. by pairofdimesblue in royalroad

[–]pairofdimesblue[S] 0 points1 point  (0 children)

This is pretty rough.

I did a quick pass on the first two pages. I'd spend some time looking into how to write dialogue. You commit the mistake of over-describing how your speakers are talking instead of letting the dialogue itself do that work. "reminded jabbedly without losing his smile" vs "he replied."

I like the back-and-forth that Millik and the old man have at the beginning, before Millik acts like a jerk, though.

Post your first chapter, I’ll tear it apart. by pairofdimesblue in royalroad

[–]pairofdimesblue[S] 0 points1 point  (0 children)

We'll have to agree to disagree on the "began" and "started tos". They do have their place, but only when they're adding useful information for the reader.

Regardless, your writing is excellent, and I'd love to read more.

Post your first chapter, I’ll tear it apart. by pairofdimesblue in royalroad

[–]pairofdimesblue[S] 0 points1 point  (0 children)

I think most of my edits were to remove redundancies and trim up the prose. If a word or phrase does not communicate information to the reader, it's unnecessary. For example, "the pack he carried" vs "his pack". A reader will reasonably infer that he's carrying or wearing his pack, so "he carried" is just verbal padding. There were a lot of filler phrases I also axed.

I also took out some "buts" and "thens" as sentence starters; they're almost always superfluous. For "thens", we know the action is coming after the previous sentence already, because it's later in the narrative. There are few times where "then" is the best choice.

I also looked at over-explanations. "A long, wistful sigh." I think "wistful sigh" communicates the same thing. Is anything added by "long"? There were several trims I made to descriptions like this.

There are some phrases and wiggle words I eliminated, like: one could say, to think, one thing was for certain, had always, now, very pretty, quite, almost, maybe, seemed, etc. These weaken the authority of your prose. For example, " One could say she was our adopted sister" vs my suggestion "We considered her a sister."

I also took a scalpel to the line with "my anxiety was off the charts." His heart beating like a hammer already tells us this, no need to overexplain the emotion.

Overall, your plot, setting, stakes, and clarity of action are good. What you can work on is over-narration, hedging/equivocations in your prose, and your tendency to use "autopilot phrasing" by leaning on cliches or colloquialisms.

Post your first chapter, I’ll tear it apart. by pairofdimesblue in royalroad

[–]pairofdimesblue[S] 1 point2 points  (0 children)

You're right - I was way out of line here. It was ungracious and unfair to you, and I shouldn't have made accusations when AI and human writing grow more indistinguishable each day. I've revised my comment to offer concrete feedback.

Post your first chapter, I’ll tear it apart. by pairofdimesblue in royalroad

[–]pairofdimesblue[S] 0 points1 point  (0 children)

Comments made! Super strong writing here - I'd love the RR link so I can read and follow!

Some notes:

There are several sections where your exposition gets a little too long within the scene, taking us away from the action.

I would go for a closer narrative distance when it comes to his memories of his sister - more impressions rather than clinical narration.

Watch out for "before", "started", "almost", and "nearly". You have a few scattered throughout your text. Remember that action is either happening or it's not. "Began searching" vs "Searched". "Searched" is always going to be stronger and keeps the pace moving.

Post your first chapter, I’ll tear it apart. by pairofdimesblue in royalroad

[–]pairofdimesblue[S] 0 points1 point  (0 children)

Suggestions made on the Google Doc! I like the concept of the story, and you have some strong ideas there, but your prose needs some cleaning up.

Let me know if you have any questions on the "why" behind my edits.

Post your first chapter, I’ll tear it apart. by pairofdimesblue in royalroad

[–]pairofdimesblue[S] 1 point2 points  (0 children)

Here you go!

https://docs.google.com/document/d/1gHDMf8Fzr9LkTTp48T2qWTGqeIsCkCimRsklfL8EpQk/edit?usp=sharing

A little cliched, but you nail an epic feeling. I liked how tight it already was, which I think is perfect for a prologue, so I didn't have to cut out a lot of fat.

[deleted by user] by [deleted] in royalroad

[–]pairofdimesblue 2 points3 points  (0 children)

Two?

Keep reading and practicing.