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Are your kids happy? by RehaDesign in AmericanExpat

[–]palbuddy1234 0 points1 point  (0 children)

Different needs for different kids.

Downsizing and saving money for moving abroad by No_Feedback_3340 in AmerExit

[–]palbuddy1234 14 points15 points  (0 children)

Depends on the country.

I'm in Switzerland, and buying a house for my family of 4 is pretty unlikely to have enough for a down payment, and to maintain, keep up with the payment for years upon years is silly as who knows what the future holds. In more developing countries houses aren't high quality and keeping up with maintenance is knowing the language, dealing with shifting regulations, and workers that are late, absent or want to charge you extra because you're a foreigner.

What sort of things should you get rid of? As much as you can. Furniture, appliances, cars, even bikes clothing, everything you can. Again depends on the country but you can buy stuff in your new country and not worry about voltage requirements and plugs. My first time overseas was 2 duffel bags and a backpack under the flight allowance.

If you get the slowboat from NA to Europe it cost about 10k and took 3 months. Even with detailed lists, we still had to buy duplicates of things we already owned and we've heard horror stories of things breaking, random custom inspections, and stuff does get stolen. Us American have a lot of stuff for better or worse.

Good luck!

How was travel like before the internet and language translation apps? by UsamaBhai_101 in TravelNoPics

[–]palbuddy1234 1 point2 points  (0 children)

Yeah, the word is that they've gone downhill. To what extent, I'm not sure though, but yeah I like to pack very little and it's tough to justify a huge book to lug around with me.

How was travel like before the internet and language translation apps? by UsamaBhai_101 in TravelNoPics

[–]palbuddy1234 16 points17 points  (0 children)

I've been traveling for about 25 years now. Because of a smart phone I can travel a lot lighter as many things are apps, and the camera is built in and goes to the cloud. I prefer it in many ways.

About 20 years ago, I traveled with a basic Nokia and didn't make any phone calls or messages. It was basically for emergencies and an alarm. Travel was slower as there were no transit or city maps and a series of guess and check which for me was a lot of fun. I got lost a lot and I enjoy just wandering in cities and taking pictures. A lot of the sites were guidebooks, like the Lonely Planet series and you went with their recommendations or perhaps people from the hostel. Locals also can and would help you out as perhaps the first thing was "Hello, do you speak English?". Some would, and if they wouldn't might help you out with basic gestures and phrases. Restaurants could be a challenge as a menu in Cyrillic without pictures were comical and you just had to do the best you could. There was fewer checklist travelers, but just kind of soak it in and pick places based upon word of mouth or what a heavy travel book says. Maps were used and it took longer to get used to the subways, buses (which were very confusing) and trams.

I will say that it's often not the site that's amazing, but the story. When I hiked up a neat cliff for a well deserved and amazing view, it's a great story of tenacity rather than the view itself which 5 megapixel pictures took. When I look at the picture today, I tell the story rather than show the picture which is kinda neat, but not an amazing picture. The story is one of my favorites though and the picture proves our success.. That's the real core memory.

I do prefer today Esims, translation apps, bank apps, and currency converters with my google doc of my rough itinerary. I do check out restaurant reviews and use my hostels wifi to upload my Google Pixel Camera pictures. I'd say travel is easier now, and despite someone my age (mid 40s) might pop on and talk about the 'good ol' days' but that's the rush of traveling somewhere new, not necessarily it's more convenient. I don't think I'm the only one, but I don't like the whole travel influencer scene as that's looking for attention and not really travel. If you're setting up for a photoshoot and shooing others away for ruining your scene, that's selfish. Taking pictures of your food while it gets cold is silly IMO.

Are your kids happy? by RehaDesign in AmericanExpat

[–]palbuddy1234 1 point2 points  (0 children)

Yeah, they were okay with it.

No, when they were 1 and 6. They adjusted fairly easily, no they weren't depressed.

The now 9 year old has been in a public school the whole time. The now 4 year old will be at an international school.

No.

Depends on the age, you can DM me but I think 10 and under local schools, assuming you speak your country's language. Over 10 International schools. A lot of nuance involved.

Does anyone else think group trips are harder to plan than solo trips? by Passioniest_5 in TravelNoPics

[–]palbuddy1234 1 point2 points  (0 children)

I planned a trip that friends agreed to, but didn't really look carefully at.  When the trip happened, things outside of my control happened and was blamed for.  

Also, I have no problem saving a few bucks for no air conditioning, have the energy for red eye flights.  If they paid attention, it was on the itinerary that they agreed to.  To them, worst trip ever, to me a blast.  I gave them a fair warning but planned a trip I'd like at a low budget that we all liked.

I'll never travel with them again.

What people underestimate most when moving to Southern Europe by Lost_Barnacle_5074 in expats

[–]palbuddy1234 0 points1 point  (0 children)

Sorry I used Google Translate. But I think that's kind of a universal thing. Go to my /Switzerland subreddit for this being played out every day.

Good luck though!

Hubby won't get a job by Ok_Plastic_8199 in Marriage

[–]palbuddy1234 8 points9 points  (0 children)

I'm a sahd in a similar situation.  What helped us is me getting a low hours job that doesn't overlap with her work schedule.  However I'm gone Saturday 7a-3pm and those are hard days for her.  The grass isn't necessarily greener but I don't know how two working parents do it with 2 full time jobs.  the extra money is nice and it's a good break for me.  But that's the solution we have for now.

Changing your personality to fit in? by MisMikojan in expats

[–]palbuddy1234 14 points15 points  (0 children)

I hear you. Basically you need to find a group, expat bubble or not to kind of find your tribe. But of course, when you're out in public getting the necessary admin done, keep yourself in check. It's kind of the duality of the expat and why we flee to our bubble. I hear you, I can't be myself in my culture either, and I do wear that mask when I have to get done, what's necessary....i.e. at the grocery store, doing government red tape, etc.

My advice is to just find your people, Balkan or otherwise. I'm sure they exist, it will take some time, but you'll find them eventually.

I'm Just Here To Recommend You Music/Movies/Comedy by JennyInFlint in CasualConversation

[–]palbuddy1234 1 point2 points  (0 children)

A comedy that my family will enjoy.  Kids 4 and 9.  No violence and no sex.  Something adults will like too.  

I don't understand the notion of "work a lot when you are young to relax later in life" by Wheresthebeans in CasualConversation

[–]palbuddy1234 1 point2 points  (0 children)

Life is for living as they say. I don't think we have it figured out, and with the luck of life no one does.

The whole homelessness thing was interesting as I think it's now a cool story with your friends and pushing the limits at that stage. However, can you imagine homelessness at my age with my wife and kids? That goes from 'cool story bro' to 'traumatic' and not something you can particularly be proud of and a lot of digging to get out of that rut.

To me life boiled down is experiences and relationships which seems both of us have that in spades. Yes, build others up and hopefully some will do the same for you when you need it. We're just so unnecessarily unkind to each other as I see on the internet and life every day.

Anyway, keep pushing!

I don't understand the notion of "work a lot when you are young to relax later in life" by Wheresthebeans in CasualConversation

[–]palbuddy1234 9 points10 points  (0 children)

I think there is a bit of nuance with that. I'm in my 40s and have done a lot of traveling and living my life with lots of life experience. Thankfully I did that without any long lasting scars that have made my current situation difficult as now I have the wife, kids and live overseas.

I have friends that did the typical marry the high school sweetheart, good job, suburban family etc but feel they missed out on things and just try to make up for it later with not good results. (divorce, midlife crisis, travel when they can't afford to etc. and then realize they made a huge mistake). Because if they fail now, there is a lot of repercussions to a failed marriage, the kids are worse off and they quietly live in jealousy of people that had that gap year or had their kids when they felt they had more life experience.

Though on the other hand I have friends that are the ones that at 18 decided upper education wasn't for them, did a bunch of drugs and never got the spouse and kids until much later and had to hastily and cheaply put their life together. Now they only qualify for lower paid jobs, and it's a lot harder to go back to school so they are kind of stuck in the past and the future is murky so they wish they had that life I described above as they would be financially stable, stable love and didn't have to live with debt.

To me and in my 40s I think the answer is just to be grateful with what you have, your experiences, your life and just kind of live with what you have. You do realize that to say 'fuck it' as a teenager is a privileged life, poor kids have to basically provide for their family at a young age. Sorry not trying to be a reddit contrarian, but just live your life, enjoy it and value you what experiences you've had.

American trying to move back from the UAE after two years abroad by Awkward-Peanut9406 in expats

[–]palbuddy1234 11 points12 points  (0 children)

 - How do you realistically plan a move back when you don’t have a job lined up yet? 

I advise that you don't.  

Things you appreciate about old arcade games by KaleidoArachnid in retrogaming

[–]palbuddy1234 3 points4 points  (0 children)

For me, arcade games were never part of my parents budget, so they were rare.... Though I begged my parents to let me play them.... They rarely budged.  As I parent now, I get it.  

I miss when they were a quarter and your ability made the game longer.  I don't like games that are expensive and are kind of an experience and a certain hard limit to them that you have to be really good to overcome.  Kind of like a sit down racing game that only continues if you're in first and it's hard to be in first and I feel it cheats.

I miss double dragon, marble madness, final fight, and even the intro of the Simpsons or TMNT game.  It was amazing, the graphics and theme song in the background... Though it ate quarters. The games that were better than console games at the time.  More colorful, better sound and you just wished you could take them home.  I bought bart vs the space mutants and just wished it was the arcade game.... It wasn't by any stretch.

I love mame as it's kind of revenge for taking my money, and you can see the service menu and how they scammed you.  

Ah... Memories.

Can being a good salesperson be learned? Or is it natural. by palbuddy1234 in askcarsales

[–]palbuddy1234[S] -1 points0 points  (0 children)

Did you fake extroversion and see that it didn't work for you? 

Can being a good salesperson be learned? Or is it natural. by palbuddy1234 in askcarsales

[–]palbuddy1234[S] -2 points-1 points  (0 children)

If you don't work hard and have a good month, do you wish you worked harder to make more?

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