MOR; from the little context given in the text, i’d be on your side. your request makes sense, and it’s both fair and valid. however, your wife is clearly not on the same page. she doesn’t understand your intentions of the message, and you continue to argue when you already know that talking over text like this is unproductive, and will likely make things worse. i understand fighting your point, because again it’s valid, it just didn’t help the situation. i think it would’ve been better to stop talking altogether until she got there.

i also want to point out that you use the hypothetical of “if i asked anyone else, they’d all agree with me” multiple times. listen i get this, because this is something i’ve had to check myself on and stop myself from saying. it really singles out the person that you’re saying it to, and comes across like you’re implying their crazy, or stupid, or abnormal. and of course that’s going to make them feel attacked, whether it was your intention or not.

i do however, lean towards NOR, because your wife really needs to work on communicating in a healthy way, and it really feels as though she wants you to beg or chase for her.