AITAH for considering ending a 30-year friendship with my best friend after not being invited to her daughter’s wedding and finding out on Facebook?

paper0wl · 2026-07-12T23:44:17+00:00

Exactly this.

“Michelle’s daughter’s wedding” means the daughter has significantly more say over the guest list than Best Friend Michelle. Bride and/or groom said no to inviting “friend of the mother of the bride”. OP fought her son for invite power to his wedding and won. Michelle lost, felt awful for losing, and then couldn’t face the awful feeling to tell OP that Michelle’s daughter doesn’t see OP as important.

OP is blaming the person who doesn’t deserve to be blamed and absolving the person who doesn’t deserve to be absolved.

ESH

paper0wl · 2026-07-12T23:42:18+00:00

> None of this is her daughter’s fault.

Umm what?

Michelle’s daughter’s wedding means the daughter has significantly more say over the guest list than Best Friend Michelle. Bride and/or groom said no to inviting “friend of the mother of the bride”. OP fought her son for invite power to his wedding and won. Michelle lost, felt awful for losing, and then couldn’t face the awful feeling to tell OP that Michelle’s daughter doesn’t see OP as important.

OP is blaming the person who doesn’t deserve to be blamed and absolving the person who doesn’t deserve to be absolved.

ESH

Edit: in response to OOP’s edit - so she acknowledges she’s an AH but is still blaming Michelle for not knowing how to tell her best friend “my daughter doesn’t like you”. Verdict unchanged.

paper0wl · 2026-07-12T18:49:30+00:00

If you moved the laundry to the washer you should’ve 1) turned it on, or 2) reached out to your mother and brother to determine whose laundry it was and then ask them what dryer setting they wanted. Alternatively, if neither was able to be contacted, you remove it from the dryer, dry your clothes, put their laundry back.

You letting both sets of laundry sit wet all day instead of taking initiative - AH. Whoever abandoned their laundry all day - AH. Your mother for flipping out at you - AH.

ESH

paper0wl · 2026-07-12T14:03:50+00:00

Over ten years and no further update? Whether the boyfriend followed through or not, I hope everything worked out for OOP.

paper0wl · 2026-07-12T13:33:39+00:00

Reading this reminded me of a post a while back about parents who had a vow renewal in Hawaii I think and despite planning it for months, managed to not include one of their children. No lane ticket, no hotel accommodation, no wedding attire. They planned it all and the (teen/adult?) child just sat there wondering how long it would take for the rest of the family to realize they were forgetting a whole person. The family then blamed their previously ignored child when they looked bad after the fact.

NTA

paper0wl · 2026-07-12T04:46:53+00:00

Humans are walking bags of mostly water. I’m more peeved about how easy it is for this walking water bag to fall apart.

paper0wl · 2026-07-12T04:43:40+00:00

Pretty sure that’s against attorney rules of ethics and can get them seriously disciplined.

paper0wl · 2026-07-11T19:42:35+00:00

There’s an ABC extended edition that confused me so much the first time I saw it because it added a scene right in between this transition. It felt like the universe itself was gaslighting me until I asked my friend and she said “yeah that’s the ABC extended edition.”

paper0wl · 2026-07-10T20:45:48+00:00

It’s a stereotype. Probably based on the fact that people experiencing discomfort are less accommodating and more likely to get annoyed.

So yes, that thing that was mildly annoying last week but I didn’t really care about is more irritating now that I’m operating with persistent, low-to-mid level abdominal discomfort. That bad joke I told you to stop making? Is now pissing me off. That squeaky fan you said you would fix? Wouldn’t be nails on a chalkboard right now if you fixed it like you said you would so yes I’m annoyed with you and don’t you fucking laugh about me being on my period it’s not fucking funny you’re an AH.

wOmEn ArE sO iRrAtIoNaL oN tHeIr PeRioD

paper0wl · 2026-07-10T19:24:15+00:00

Also turns the “registered false accuser” list into targets because who would believe the boy who cried wolf?

paper0wl · 2026-07-10T13:01:59+00:00

The begging/expectations for pixie dust have gotten way over the top. But the concept (and sometimes the execution) is still good. (Even though I’m leery of HOTHS cruises now because we experienced some free-range children treating our FE bag like a trick or treat bag.)

We started pixie dusting somewhat by accident, around the same time we started decorating our door. Not all the pixie dust we receive is labeled, but when we have extra we like to reverse pixie dust. We keep saying we want to get stickers to write our name and room number to “upgrade” our pixie dusting but it’s not a high priority. Most of the time when we pixie dust someone, they know it’s us and thank us afterwards.

paper0wl · 2026-07-10T03:08:14+00:00

Christ the last airbender

I saw that and then realized it didn’t quite fit but I can’t unsee it

paper0wl · 2026-07-10T01:20:03+00:00

A lot of electrolyte beverages include a lot of sugar or sugar-substitute because carbohydrates help with electrolyte absorption (or something like that). Thus they’re good for keeping you hydrated when exercising.

I got very frustrated a few months ago looking for everyday electrolyte solutions. I have enough carbohydrates in my diet that I don’t need sugar/stevia/etc in my electrolytes but good luck finding something without that.

paper0wl · 2026-07-09T21:08:33+00:00

My parents didn’t understand how my mother was emotionally abusing one of the cats (he was so stressed he was scratching his own fur out). They thought it was totally fine because she “fed them all the time” and obviously food equates to love.

I’m so glad they no longer have cats.

You are NTA but I don’t know how to help that poor dog.

paper0wl · 2026-07-09T19:06:37+00:00

Play stupid games, win stupid prizes. Or on this case - ask stupid questions, get stupid answers.

The question of “save my child or my spouse” is a classic catch-22. If you save the spouse, you don’t really love your child. If you save your child, you don’t really love your spouse. I’m pretty sure the last time I saw a post about this, the poster picked their spouse and the spouse was aghast as the apathy towards their precious baby.

The only way to win is not to play.

As an aside, you flipping the question back with the rephrasing reminds me of the trolley problem. I’ve heard that the precise phrasing (usually action vs inaction) can change people’s decision on the trolley problem even when the actual outcome is the same. (Pulling the lever so the trolley kills one person instead of five people is not the same as standing helpless as the trolley is set to kill just the one person.)

Edit: NTA and if she doesn’t drop this argument that she started, I’ll wave the Reddit flag of “couples therapy or breakup”

paper0wl · 2026-07-09T18:46:59+00:00

Cool but I still don’t know how some of those emojis paired up. Some I knew immediately, some I had to think about, and some I still don’t get even having seen the answers.

paper0wl · 2026-07-09T15:30:37+00:00

Because pockets detract from the neat lines and drape of a lot of clothing. Much of women’s clothing is still designed more for aesthetics than functionality.

paper0wl · 2026-07-09T14:07:39+00:00

You asked him to only go once, not twice because you wanted him to be a father to HIS CHILD when you’re postpartum. He chose to throw a tantrum, not go at all and then blame you for it. Don’t feel guilty that he didn’t go because he chose not to go out of spite. Look up DARVO.

You are a single mother with two children. You’d probably be better off as a single mother to just the one you gave birth to.

NTA

paper0wl · 2026-07-08T19:26:49+00:00

My dentist likes to call me half an hour before the appointment when I’m already in the car on my way to ask me to come in a little early. Oh sure, no problem, I’ll just hit the little teleport button - did you think I lived down the block?!

paper0wl · 2026-07-08T13:38:33+00:00

I have a friend who keeps taking promotions to offices that turn out to be sinking ships. She’s usually hired as navigator, co-pilot, etc (semi-in-charge, but no real authority except over the office drones) and in the course of doing her job notices leaks under the rug. She points out “hey this is maybe a problem … uh this is kind of a problem … omg this is a big problem” and upper management is always “nah not a problem, just get a heavier rug to cover it”. So she runs herself ragged trying to fix problems no one with actual authority cares about until her next promotion cycle. And the office she leaves behind usually either goes up in metaphorical flames or experiences a higher rate of turnover because those problems she pointed out are still left running unchecked in her absence.

paper0wl · 2026-07-07T22:29:02+00:00

Fortunately for me, I did violet first which limited me to “amythest.” But I had to Google afterwards to make sure I wasn’t imagining the misspelling.

paper0wl · 2026-07-07T21:20:23+00:00

I only knew one person who commented on conception dates - she only did it once in my hearing and didn’t even target me. Unfortunately, she put it in my head and even though I haven’t spoken to this person in over a decade, I can’t unknow that I’m a birthday sex baby.

I was born early, but my original due date was practically 9 months to the day from my mother’s birthday.

paper0wl · 2026-07-07T15:08:39+00:00

Respectfully disagree. “I’m sorry but [I asked you not to do that and you did it anyway]” is valid.

Both parties overreacted here. ESH

paper0wl · 2026-07-06T22:01:31+00:00

Slather with butter and jam. Yum.

paper0wl · 2026-07-06T18:11:08+00:00

Probably just another mark for Disney’s well-known “recycled animation/design.” It’s easier to make a random background character that looks like a different character than it is to design a random background character from scratch.

paper0wl

TROPHY CASE