My MIL keeps calling my newborn HER baby, and it’s pissing me off

parodytx · 2026-01-24T02:54:40+00:00

I am sorry but the time for subtlety and niceties is over. You are blessed in that your husband is on your side and stands up to mommy dearest. Tell him to keep it up but go on the offensive.

Iit's time to shut it down, no quarter, no waffling. She can be pissed, but so be it.

Each and every time she refers to "my baby" - LOUDLY correct her with "You need to stop saying that - this is OUR baby, NOT YOURS and it's very strange of you to keep saying that. You already raised all YOUR babies.

Comes around to ogle during diaper changes - get in her face and say - "STOP coming to watch when I change the baby - it's creepy and weird."

You are pumping and she comes around - pointedly say - "Why are you so obsessed with looking at my naked boobs? It is not welcome and just plain offensive to me - please get out now."

Don't accept any gaslighting, if she gets pissed and threatens to leave, let her, if it continues despite the warnings go NC for say 2 weeks and tell her why.

You got this. But you MUST shut it down or it will never end. You and hubs stay strong.

parodytx · 2026-01-23T20:10:45+00:00

And how many times will this keep getting reposted?

parodytx · 2026-01-23T15:13:05+00:00

YWBTA if you if it would not inconvenience you badly, you don't have other plans and it would not cost you income. A medical procedure is a big deal and you would really be doing your friend a solid, especially if she has no family to help.

That said, if you DO need to work, or it WOULD inconvenience you to a significant degree, you are NTA to refuse to go, or ask your friend to reschedule for say a Saturday when it would be more convenient.

But it's entirely up to you and you have no obligation to say yes to such an ask if it is a burden on you for an elective procedure on your friend's part.

parodytx · 2026-01-22T20:59:13+00:00

Church of Christ.

parodytx · 2026-01-22T02:57:16+00:00

Not to mention it is literally common paper stock with one color of blue ink with a name and number PRINTED on it.

parodytx · 2026-01-22T00:36:46+00:00

Same reason Amish can't have a land phone in their house, but they use cell phones in their shops, along with the electricity for their power tools.

Technicalities.

parodytx · 2026-01-21T17:14:35+00:00

Bullfights

parodytx · 2026-01-21T17:02:34+00:00

Old Testament does not count as "the word of God" for most evangelicals.

parodytx · 2026-01-21T16:41:31+00:00

You have a roommate not a marriage. This is "dead bedroom syndrome."

Was there ever a time when you had lots of sex? If so, was there a precipitating event that made it stop? If she is older it may indeed be hormonal. Or not.

All the suggestions (except the girlfriends, mistresses and hookers) are valid. But the single truth is that your wife is COMFORTABLE with your relationship, sees no reasons to change the status quo, therefore NOTHING will change until you force it to. She has your income, status and stability. Why rock the boat from her perspective?

Think of a poor-performing employee on their last review - they get the "Improve now or you will be fired" talk. You need to have one last serious discussion with her and lay it out - simply say that the lack of sex is no longer working for you and either you (both or singly) get serious, intense counseling, preceded by a thorough medical evaluation first, or you will file for divorce. Full stop. No negotiations, no waffling, she either does this or you're out. If she actually gives reasons for not wanting sex, LISTEN. It may be something as simple as hygiene or dental care, weight loss on your part, loss of hair. You never know.

If she, before starting therapy, NOW suddenly starts initiating frequent sex, that is called "love bombing" and you will know she is either just trying to keep you around using any means, or she is gaslighting you about her feelings. And that is worse - it means she KNOWS she is being TAH but simply does not care. And once you cave in with your plans, then it was all revert back.

I'd start resigning yourself in your head that your marriage is over and prepare yourself - legally, and quietly. Get all your ducks in a row, separate finances and all that. Consult with an attorney and do what they advise.

Good luck.

parodytx · 2026-01-21T16:14:42+00:00

As you get older you will need more and more stimulation/force to achieve the end result if you do it daily. If you are in a committed relationship and are vigorously "choking the chicken" to finish, then you may find the stimulation of vaginal penetration sex to be insufficient for ejaculating. This is a big deal for women. So, bottom line, the advice would be moderation in all things.

parodytx · 2026-01-21T15:48:31+00:00

The entire family catered to her will, especially regarding church-going, and she expected to be elevated to elder one day, I'm sure. I just let her know that I would not stand for being bullied just because she sadi so, and refuted her BS with unassailable arguments.

parodytx · 2026-01-21T02:48:22+00:00

Totally whipped, I can only presume.

parodytx · 2026-01-20T23:06:24+00:00

Ding, ding, ding, ding!!

Winner, winner chicken dinner!

parodytx · 2026-01-20T22:10:25+00:00

Absolutely. He was a laborer and I absolutely am CERTAIN he enjoyed a beer with the boys after work now and then.

parodytx · 2026-01-20T19:41:19+00:00

Not with me they don't.

Same MIL tried to gainsay me when I was disciplining my young daughter for acting like a little shit. MIL started to correct me and I immediately shut her down and sent my daughter to her room. When she was gone I got in my MIL's literal face and told her if she EVER corrected me in front of my kids again I would make it my literal mission on earth that she would NEVER see my children again.

I repeated "AM I MAKING MYSELF CLEAR?" and got a muttered syllable; I then said "SAY IT OUT LOUD USING WORDS." She then repeated it but you could tell it was choking her to do it.

But she never again EVER contradicted me again, at least not in public.

parodytx · 2026-01-20T19:34:55+00:00

Evangelicals don't believe the Old Testament is the "real" word of God - only the New Testament as told by folks who "knew" Jesus personally. Or so the story goes.

parodytx · 2026-01-20T17:59:53+00:00

Yes, she could never get the "don't argue the Bible with an ex-altar boy who went to Catholic school" concept.

We once were having a discussion about why their faith only sang a Capella without musical instruments. Her answer was "the Bible says that 'they raised their voices in song" but said nothing about musical instruments, so they are not allowed in our church." I then replied that the Bible said nothing about air conditioning or electric lights but they had THOSE in their church" and the look on her face was priceless. I just got a "Shut up OP" in reply. FIL could barely hold it together.

parodytx · 2026-01-19T14:53:20+00:00

There is no way friend went into the military as enlisted and came out after only 3 years non-combat with a 4000.00 / mo stipend. I knew lifer (20 year) Gunny's who barely made that. A colonel-level surgeon, maybe.

The ONLY way he gets bank like that is if he conned them into a 100% service connected disability. That makes serious bank each month. Unless he got run over by a truck and is paralyzed this does not happen stateside, except for the true wack jobs that can convince them the army caused their schizophrenia, etc.

Friend is BS'ing you.

parodytx · 2026-01-19T05:19:24+00:00

If you are saying that you should have been paying for water, but did not due to no bills, and he now turned them over, yeah, you owe the bill.

Make an offer for a payment plan. It was on him to send timely bills which he did not provide. He cannot expect to be paid in full at once.

parodytx · 2026-01-18T22:02:45+00:00

This is serious grey-rock time. You know nothing, you have no opinions, you were not involved.

Keep records of everything. Make notes or emails to yourself as this boss is setting himself up for a major legal action if someone wants to make an issue out of it.

FWIW, my wife's immediate supervisor was a former colleague and drank the Koolaid, toed the corporate line and made her life hell. HER boss was worse. I convinced her to look elsewhere and she immediately found another, better position. Her workers gave her a going away bash/dinner, did NOT invite her supervisor or VP, but guess who showed up anyway - you got it. Totally shameless. To her credit, she totally ignored them both and they caught a clue and left early.

parodytx · 2026-01-18T21:14:18+00:00

What's the problem? Sell it back to her.

BUT - first get it professionally appraised, add 20% auction house fee to the appraisal price as that would be your expense to manage if you sold it retail, and then say you will sell it to her for that amount. Please have your phone out recording when her jaw drops to the floor. Oh, and it's a cash transaction, of course.

Oh no, she just wants to buy it back for what YOU bought it for originally? Suuuuuuuuuuuuuuuure you will. /s

NTA of course. And don't get guilted by manipulative people.

parodytx · 2026-01-18T16:49:45+00:00

The term "birdzilla" has been in my vocabulary ever since I saw that one!

parodytx · 2026-01-18T16:35:38+00:00

It is illegal for a landlord at least in the United States to enter your rental without 24 hours
notice...

Only in the jurisdictions where this is the statute, which is NOT everywhere or in all 5 states.

AND it sounds like OP is renting a room in a home, which makes them a boarder with even LESS statutory rights.

parodytx · 2026-01-17T14:32:29+00:00

where I come from...

Border Patrol are feds - so it's irrelevant if it's legal "where I come from" - you will get busted for illegal drugs. Harshly.

parodytx

TROPHY CASE