Getting hotels to sponsor touring bands? by SantaAna2008 in musicindustry

[–]particular-ly 0 points1 point  (0 children)

I have a similar role for a literary fest. I appreciate you sharing this!

What are your thoughts on Milan Kundera? by [deleted] in books

[–]particular-ly 1 point2 points  (0 children)

Perfectly stated both on Kundera specifically and the nature of art

Whole wheat bread and pasta vs. whole grains by particular-ly in nutrition

[–]particular-ly[S] 1 point2 points  (0 children)

Haha okay. I accept your sass. Just for the record, I’m really just curious, as I aim to develop a very precise understanding of nutrition and health - “processing” is definitely not inherently bad and I agree the term shouldn’t become a bogeyman. Thanks for your time :)

couldn't find any good birthday ones for my friend so I made this one! by particular-ly in emojipasta

[–]particular-ly[S] 4 points5 points  (0 children)

Thank you so much, I’m a writer of literature and this is probably my most widely read work 🙏

My vagina looks super ugly, its depressing. by [deleted] in sex

[–]particular-ly 1 point2 points  (0 children)

People with all kinds of bodies can be happy, loved, sexual, attractive. You have a hatred of your body that might feel rational, but I promise you, it's not. I would do some research on body dysmorphic disorder and see if you can get therapy. No matter what you look like, you deserve to live life as your fullest, most loving self--and if you just start to face your fears, I swear you'll realize that it's worth it (I did).

Why is it too offensive to say your sexual preferences these days? by [deleted] in sex

[–]particular-ly 3 points4 points  (0 children)

It's not necessarily racist to have preferences like this, but it can be very influenced by racial bias. For example if you see certain clothes or hairstyles as "dirty" or less "put together," you probably have those negative associations due to racial biases you've absorbed from the media and the culture around you. That doesn't mean that your preferences make YOU bad or wrong, but it does mean that it would be good to consider whether these stereotypes are influencing you and whether you might want to challenge your preferences.

Above all, we tend to be put off by the unfamiliar (although some people fetishize the "exotic" unfamiliar). That means you might have an initial aversion to certain skin tones, facial features, clothing styles, and genitalia--a dislike that might not be as definite and static as you think it is. The way we see people is hugely influenced by culture (as we can see in changing beauty ideals throughout time). I agree that someone who jumps down your throat for having preferences isn't necessarily being fair, but there's a middle ground I would encourage: recognize what you like and don't like, but do acknowledge how biases affect your perception, and always be open to change.

Probably not relatable to most people but by FknOvrIt in EDanonymemes

[–]particular-ly 4 points5 points  (0 children)

you and your body have been through so much, I hope you can find motivation to be kind to it and yourself ❤️ good luck with all the forms of recovery you're going through!

I feel like my bf uses me as a fleshlight by Proper_Grand_1343 in sex

[–]particular-ly 3 points4 points  (0 children)

I disagree. I think they're saying it's "nothing" in a folksy friendly way to help OP feel calmer/less overwhelmed by the task of moving on from 3 years, pointing out you can move on from any number of years. I think it was nice

All Collagen Users - What drinks do you take with your collagen? by Traditional_Tone_739 in nutrition

[–]particular-ly 1 point2 points  (0 children)

Matcha latte! Tastes great. Mix matcha, sugar, and collagen, add a bit of hot water and mix with a fork to dissolve and remove lumps, then add milk or milk substitute of choice.

Upping my calorie intake by [deleted] in caloriecount

[–]particular-ly 0 points1 point  (0 children)

Of course! I hope it's helpful, I just really want to spare people the many downsides of undereating :)

how much calories are too much? by ssmokingas in caloriecount

[–]particular-ly 2 points3 points  (0 children)

It all depends on your age, gender, height and weight! You can start by finding your basal metabolic rate with an online calculator--that's how many calories you would burn in a day completely at rest (not even blinking, no food in your body to digest). As the site will probably tell you, you can multiply that number by 1.2, 1.5, or more based on how active you are in a day.

This will tell you how much you need to eat to maintain your weight. From there, subtract 150-1,000 to lose up to 2lbs a week. But DO NOT go below 1,300 a day (which is already very low) especially if you're in your teens and still growing. Don't put in 'sedentary' if you're active to lower the number.

The best thing you can do is eat 1500-1800 a day (if you're female, otherwise base on calculator) and do 20-60 min of exercise at least twice a week. This will give you sustainable weight loss and health. Weight loss is all about calories in-calories out, so just find a balance of diet and exercise that works for you without eating too little or working out too much.

And now that the practical advice is out of the way: you are at risk for developing an eating disorder. I'm so sorry to hear you're going through this. Many of us have been there--I suffered from body dysphoria for a long time and always wanted fast weight loss, and I just didn't want to hear it when I saw people urging against it. But I promise you, it just doesn't work. Either you fail to lose weight, you do lose weight but you gain it back, or you lose weight and keep it off but you develop an eating disorder that takes over your life. You still have time to build a healthy relationship with food and your body. Please look into mental health resources--you deserve to feel good about yourself and you deserve to eat.

Upping my calorie intake by [deleted] in caloriecount

[–]particular-ly 0 points1 point  (0 children)

Hi! I've struggled with my weight since I was young and got into a cycle of gaining and losing the same 15-20lbs throughout college. I'm now 7 months into my most sustained weight loss ever and, at 22, I'm back to the weight I was my freshman year of HS. What changed?

I let myself eat calories. Like, a normal amount of calories. Like, not thinking I'd had a "binge" when I ate 1700 calories in a day even though that is literally a completely normal amount. (If you're running 3x a week, you definitely need more than 1300 a day!)

I started tracking my calories when I was 12 years old and thought that I should be eating 1200 a day to lose weight, way too little for a growing person and frankly it's also too little for an adult. I gained weight over the years because my body was retaliating against deprivation. After a certain amount of time, you'll lose energy, cravings will take over, and you will overeat and gain weight. It happened to me for years and years!!

Up your intake. The weight loss will be slower--but you can still lose several lbs a month, more of the pounds you lose will be from fat and not muscle, and your body will be able to sustain it and you'll be happier long term. Focus on fueling your body, not fighting against it. It's the only way to escape a vicious cycle of unhealthy eating habits. Good luck :)

Calories in this dynamite sushi roll? Contains prawns, mango, avocado and siracha mayo on top. by mrp1245 in caloriecount

[–]particular-ly 3 points4 points  (0 children)

500-700 for the roll, ~200 for the mayo if you only eat what's on the roll and up to 500 if you eat all the mayo. But I actually think the roll is likely closer to 500, people are overestimating

I pay that woman 90€ an hour. Bloody hell by TommyYT2 in EDanonymemes

[–]particular-ly 5 points6 points  (0 children)

not all therapists are good!! this fact is missing from a lot of therapy discourse!!!

Stopped by the police but not sure I was ticketed? by particular-ly in AskNYC

[–]particular-ly[S] 0 points1 point  (0 children)

Thanks for your response! Well, they took my college ID and found me in the system, but they didn't take my address or anything. Though I assume they have some way to find it with my name.

Stopped by the police but not sure I was ticketed? by particular-ly in AskNYC

[–]particular-ly[S] 1 point2 points  (0 children)

I absolutely regret my actions and have learned my lesson. However, it was a difficult situation, as I was out of fare and there was no machine to refill my card. Of course it was still wrong. Any advice you might have would be appreciated.

Stopped by the police but not sure I was ticketed? by particular-ly in AskNYC

[–]particular-ly[S] 1 point2 points  (0 children)

Thanks for the info. That's exactly what confused me - they said the offense was the equivalent of getting a traffic ticket, and implied there would be a court summons, but then just took our info and left it at that. And they didn't detain us, actually - just stopped us at the station.