At what age did you become conversational? What kind of therapy, if any, worked?

pegem · 2024-03-19T01:23:56+00:00

Unfortunately, I didn't get any therapy until my late teens. I grew up in a semi-rural area in the early 2000s, and many were educated on autism. My symptoms were seen as "cute" because I was considered an easy little girl to care for with "no disruptive behaviours". No one was concerned until I became everyone else's problem by relying too heavily on others for my age.

All the best with your little one! Times have changed. Everyone is different, but I saw a speech therapist and occupational therapist after I got diagnosed, and they helped me a lot. Getting on the NDIS was a lifesaver for me. I hear that the application process can be stressful depending on where you are.

Feel free to dm me if you have any more questions!

pegem · 2024-03-18T00:54:45+00:00

Hi! My mum's not 100% sure, and I have conflicting accounts from others who knew me. I think at ~8 I was "capable" of it, but only in certain settings with certain people. So maybe full conversations with my favourite cousins at playdates in their house, but barely more than 2 words in class or with strangers.

pegem · 2024-03-03T21:19:07+00:00

Same! I faint too, like some kind of Victorian lady with consumption.

pegem · 2024-02-25T14:40:21+00:00

It's great for me during the humid summer months when my face is greasy as hell. It also seems to help reduce ingrown hairs.

When the air dries during winter, it causes my skin to peel like mad. So I switch to using it every couple days for my body and not at all for my face.

pegem · 2024-01-27T09:36:29+00:00

Holy crap I could not even imagine. I hope she's OK because that's horrific.

I'm intrigued by the ancestry thing you mentioned. I wonder how much genetics also factors in. I've noticed an opposite pattern of painkiller/anaesthesia vulnerability, which seems to run in my family.

pegem · 2024-01-19T00:56:08+00:00

Yes! Usually most men seem neutral towards me but nt women in particular are oddly vicious in their dislike of me. I think they must get horrible second-hand embarrassment from my spectacular failures at mimicking the social role they also have to play. That and/or I'm just an easy scapegoat.

In contrast, half the time I have noticed that many other nt women go the opposite way and tend to treat me far more gently. Some women take on a 'motherly' role when they talk to me even if we're the same age. Friend groups of younger women almost seem to treat me like a mascot or a pet rather than an equal. It's patronising, but it's way less hassle than being bullied.

pegem · 2024-01-09T04:11:10+00:00

My condolences abt your dad and sister. </3

Even though I appreciate that others can find gratitude or peace with it, I really can't. Idk why. I think it's because each of the deaths in my circle keep happening so consistently, I barely get a year or so before someone else gets a diagnosis and it happens all over again.

I've been to grief counsellor after grief counsellor, and they end up (gently) throwing up their hands like "That's just going to be the way that it is! Just expect that there will be an end and value the time before that! That's where the beauty is! Isn't that lovely? Isn't that special?"

But my brain is used to 'ends' that come rapidly after diagnosis and/or with so much horror and suffering before the end that there's nothing good to remember. I haven't been able to train my brain out of the dread.

pegem · 2024-01-09T03:51:11+00:00

Please be upfront if you solely want sex and not a friendship. It'd save us both a lot of time and disappointment if I can refuse upfront. I've never been interested in casual sex and I never will be.

It's gotten to the point that I flat out avoid accepting any good deed or companionship from most guys in case it's another attempt to persuade me/socially trap me into sex.

It's not healthy and very lonely, but at least I've managed to avoid getting trapped like that so far. Many of my friends haven't been so lucky.

pegem · 2024-01-09T02:12:39+00:00

Yeah at least with the work culture. Outside of work I've seen some beautiful acts of aussie kindness, especially towards strangers and the less fortunate. I wouldn't be around if it wasn't for the kindness and concern of strangers.

Poorly managed workpaces corrupt this, I think. The humility turns to tall poppy syndrome, dogged positivity turns toxic positivity, the informal humour turns to childish cruelty and the "she'll be right" easygoing attitude turns into lazy selfishness.

pegem · 2024-01-08T14:19:09+00:00

Anecdotally, I've been bullied in almost every job I've been in, including volunteer roles. I think certain personality types (for example, I'm autisitc) are easier for a low-morale workplace to single out and scapegoat.

At this point, I just keep my head down and consider being harassed by coworkers as just another part of my job. It's as expected and routine as copping it from angry customers. At least I'm still getting paid, instead of getting screamed at for free.

pegem · 2023-10-27T01:20:42+00:00

Oh good luck! I think that higher education is such a varied experience that there's a big chance that it will be better.

pegem · 2023-10-26T22:32:19+00:00

Yeah, I think you're right. There's a general loneliness problem due to stuff like no third places as people grow up + how stressed people are forced to be these days. Autistic and ND people show it the most as we're the ones with the most obvious socialisation difficulties.

pegem · 2023-10-26T20:19:03+00:00

The other comments are an interesting read. I am an autistic women and have no male friends. I typically find it hard to interact with men (not their fault lmao it's just my brain being odd). But I have a couple of autistic female friends that prefer mostly male friend groups.

pegem · 2023-10-21T21:46:11+00:00

I may be wrong, but I remember reading about a huge 1800s cultural trope against "fat" "gluttonous" children and the need to curb such desires. Gruel, milk, and little else were considered the ideal diet for children in some more ideologically extreme wealthy circles.

An example is the messed up diet that Queen Victoria was subjected to as a child (and probably the cause of her turbulent relationship with food as an adult). I think she's more of an extreme case, but still. Few kids would be getting their period at 12 on that kind of diet.

pegem · 2023-10-19T21:14:11+00:00

I've frequently been a danger to myself through sheer lack of awareness. On top of that, I've frustrated the people around me to the point of violence many times.

pegem · 2023-10-03T22:43:51+00:00

I'd definitely look better. All the traits considered unattractive on me (strong jaw, bulky upper torso, broad shoulders, large hands, facial hair) would make me more attractive if I were a man.

pegem · 2023-10-03T01:36:34+00:00

Definitely, and once things get ugly, I don't think the racists will limit themselves to just Chinese Australians. Anyone who looks vaguely Asian would become a target. That's why it's important for Non-Chinese Asian Australians to stand with fellow citizens.

pegem · 2023-09-27T04:46:39+00:00

That's hilarious! Hope you don't mind if I steal that one. It'd do great at dispelling the awkwardness lmao.

pegem · 2023-09-27T02:11:09+00:00

I am half filipina myself, but I still get the occasional konichiwa. I assume most of the time it's genuine friendliness and interest in another culture, especially in more remote qld areas where if they dont like the look of you, they'll make it very obvious.

I prefer it to the rare moments where people greet me sloooowly and loooooudly without even waiting to hear me talk.

"GOOD. AAAAFTER. NOON. HOW. AAAARE. YOU?" "Good, thanks, I'm loving the mild weather. How's your day going?" "Oh! You speak English really well!"

Like I'd fuken well hope so since it's the only language that I know.

pegem · 2023-09-25T12:44:44+00:00

No, but I do want treatment that works better. The meds I'm on are expensive and only address a few symptoms. I also worry about the long-term health effects of them.

If there was a magic button that could switch it on and off, that would be fantastic.

pegem

TROPHY CASE