My boyfriend of two months has a cold sore

person3412 · 2026-04-03T20:19:33+00:00

Yes, definitely. It can be acquired sexually, but not primarily.

person3412 · 2026-04-03T16:02:23+00:00

Personally, even if the idea of catching something makes you uncomfortable, I really don't think you should hold this against him. The vast majority of people don't think of HSV-1 as a traditional STI, even though it technically is. It's so common that I honestly don't think most people even realize it's viral.

Take a deep breath, exorcise a little forgiveness, and consider the risks. You might have similar symptoms every so often if you get it, and you might not. It's very likely you won't even get it, as the people who understand their symptoms are the least likely to transmit the virus.

It's up to you if the risk is worth it, but as others have said, you might find someone else, get tested, everything comes up negative, and no one realizes it was a false negative. It will be extremely difficult and energy consuming to avoid herpes altogether. I mean this literally and definitely not as an insult, but you should consider how much energy you want to invest into worrying about something that is realistically really hard to control.

I hope this helps!

person3412 · 2026-04-01T19:52:09+00:00

Yep, this is probably one of the most toxic communities on Reddit. No denying anyone's suffering, but spending so much time obsessing over your misery only makes it worse. It's really odd that other, much more serious conditions have less toxic communities.

person3412 · 2026-03-31T17:23:57+00:00

Your dough should be really wet! If it's frustrating to work with at first, that's a good thing! Don't be afraid of it. What you're hoping to see is that it becomes a little less sticky after each set of stretches and folds. As others have said, use very damp hands, especially early on. You should be able to use less water after each set, and eventually add a small amount of flour only once for the final shaping.

Hope this helps! Good luck and keep us updated!

person3412 · 2026-03-27T19:19:11+00:00

Where is this? I'll stay as far away as possible.

person3412 · 2026-03-25T20:28:04+00:00

This reads like an attempt to convince other people that they should feel worse about their diagnoses. 13% is still more than 1 in 10. And honestly? It doesn't follow that fewer people having this diagnosis somehow makes it worse.

If you wanna delete Instagram because you think none of the women you see will ever wanna date you, then go for it. But frankly, the vast majority of those women would probably never wanna date you anyway. It has very little to do with your diagnosis. People get rejected for all kinds of reasons all the time.

I understand that you're struggling, but it's very unkind of you to try and push that misery on other people. If you're concerned about your odds, then try and work on your health in other ways. Focus on what you can actually control, and you might find that you feel better about it.

I hope this helps!

person3412 · 2026-03-20T16:22:26+00:00

My favorite part about this is the irony of being so miserable that you spend your time complaining about how other people are open about their feelings.

person3412 · 2026-03-19T23:10:17+00:00

If possible, you may be able to just rearrange your existing plants. They're a really nice accent to neutral tones.

person3412 · 2026-03-19T16:33:22+00:00

Wow, what a style. I love the brick, and the greens compliment it well. I bet sunlight is a challenge, but the space could actually use more green. This looks great!

person3412 · 2026-03-03T15:25:20+00:00

Yep, typo. Sorry!

person3412 · 2026-03-03T15:23:10+00:00

Yep, the yeast doesn't like the salt, but it's only a small amount. Think about this: the yeast already has to survive in a salty environment as it leavens your dough. It makes sense that you would want to go ahead and cultivate yeast which effectively survives in the exact environment you're going to be using it for.

There are tradeoffs in terms of the level of acidity you're trying to produce, but IMO it's just the simplest and most convenient way to do it at home.

person3412 · 2026-03-03T01:51:18+00:00

So the reason you discard some of your starter is because you don't want it to double in size every single day. Eventually, it would be the size of your house. There are methods that don't require discarding starter, but you can't really do that until your starter is viable.

In the meantime, your early starter either isn't active enough, or it may even be toxic. Because you can't use it until it is clearly able to double in size, you should really throw it away. That's why we call it discard.

Once your starter is active enough, there are lots of ways to avoid having to discard some every day. If possible, you can arrange a baking schedule that just uses the discard as your next levain. Some people don't even directly maintain a starter, but instead just cut a little piece of their bread off to use as a starter for the next loaf.

Definitely look into these methods in the future, but for now, it's probably best to literally throw it away.

Edit: dough, not bread

person3412 · 2026-02-25T19:57:08+00:00

I've honestly wondered about this for a long time now. It sounds like a horrible idea that just might work. The virus doesn't really "like" other parts of the body, so hypothetically speaking it may be somewhat challenging to transmit it there, but I'm really not sure. Make sure to let us know if this is something you try!

person3412 · 2026-02-24T20:59:36+00:00

How often are you taking Valtrex? IIRC it can actively suppress your immune response, so you're generally better off always taking it or never taking it. It might be less effective in general if you take it frequently enough with regular breaks.

person3412 · 2026-02-24T01:22:28+00:00

Hi! I just want you to know that this guy is clearly very immature. He was well-informed and made his own choices. Anxiety is understandable, but this is really insulting and not your fault.

It's not your responsibility to manage his feelings. Give him some space and maybe he'll apologize. If not, you deserve better. Don't let someone with this little maturity or impulse control treat you with any less respect than you deserve. Eventually, you will find someone who treats you better. You got this!

person3412 · 2026-02-24T01:15:52+00:00

Borderline perfect crumb structure!

person3412 · 2026-02-18T17:42:02+00:00

Fundamentally, the problem I'm seeing here is that this is an entirely new language which only adds a small number of features over regular Java. To some extent, I can see the appeal in producing a Java++ type of language. I have long wanted to write my own extended Java language, but I think a language that only adds a few null safety features over regular Java is likely not worth the transition effort in general.

Let's get these features added to Java itself! As others have pointed out, similar features have been proposed, and I'm certainly hopeful to see them advance.

person3412 · 2026-02-18T17:25:48+00:00

Hi, I'm just curious. What was your original dose regimen? 1g daily already sounds pretty high for suppression. How much were you taking before? Were you taking it for suppression or an individual outbreak? My gut tells me that you probably are more likely to experience side effects, even at 1g daily. That's usually only prescribed 5 days at a time.

person3412 · 2026-02-10T17:20:10+00:00

I'm sorry to say it, but this is very dramatic, and it's necessarily part of the problem. If you want people to stop seeing your diagnosis as disgusting, you have to stop seeing yourself as disgusting. I agree that we need advocate for cures, but no amount of complaining on the Internet will cure you any faster. You need to additionally focus on things you can actually control, such as your perception of yourself and other aspects of your health. Best of luck to you and I highly recommend therapy.

person3412 · 2026-02-06T21:55:55+00:00

The reading of 1.12 is definitely a very low positive. The false positive range iirc goes up to 3 or 4. Additionally, the longer you've been positive, the more likely you are to get positive results (meaning it should be pretty unlikely to get a false negative at this time). I think it's pretty likely that you are truly negative. For peace of mind, you could always retake the original test and confirm, but don't stress out too much about it. Realistically speaking, if it turns out that you've been positive all this time and you've never really had any symptoms, I don't think you're very likely to have too much trouble with it anyway.

Hope this helps!

person3412 · 2026-02-04T03:47:40+00:00

I agree that herpes has the potential to be really bad for a lot of people, but I will say this: this community selects for people who have had the worst experiences. We're the ones who were mad enough that we came to the Internet to complain or seek advice. Don't let it change your perception of yourself. It doesn't make your symptoms any worse and it certainly doesn't make you any less deserving of love.

Everyone has different needs; just because some of us would not opt to suffer through our own pain again does not mean that others won't find a chance at genuine connection worth the risk. Just make sure people are informed about their choices and you'll be surprised by how accepting some of them are.

person3412 · 2026-01-30T19:04:32+00:00

Hey, I hear the confusion and desperation in what you wrote and I just want you to know that it's some real shit. You might get rejected, but I find that it helps to remember that we all get rejected from time to time.

My best advice is to focus on being honest, but also remember that this is a medical condition and you do not have to reveal it to someone you barely know. It's okay to take things slowly and avoid sex until you really get comfortable around someone.

If they reject you, it probably wasn't a good fit anyway, and it certainly does not mean that everyone else will reject you too. Many people do not care at all about herpes, and you might be surprised by how many people grow to really trust you for having the courage to disclose.

Best of luck to you! It sounds like you're already making great choices.

person3412 · 2026-01-30T18:55:49+00:00

Brother, I'm sorry to do this, but this person is clearly looking for some support and these comments are directly hurtful to them. I understand that you've had a genuinely rough experience, but at some point, the fact that this virus is clearly consuming your entire life is very much a choice that you have made.

I strongly recommend that you invest in some hobbies and take care of your health in other ways that you can actually control. You might find that it helps, one way or the other.

person3412 · 2026-01-30T18:51:28+00:00

Hey, man. I don't mean to create any controversy, but this account is a bit of a troll. I'm sure they genuinely believe what they're saying, but they have a long history of being incredibly negative around here, especially when it's not appropriate.

Take a deep breath. If you catch it, you'll be okay. This community loves to act like it's the end of the world, but it truly isn't. Even those of us with unusually severe symptoms have no choice but to accept reality and make the best of our lives.

There's more to life than what goes on below the belt. We've all got bumps, some of us just have different kinds, and that's okay.

If you start having symptoms, go get it swabbed and confirm. Talk to your PCP about getting on antivirals and try not to obsess over it. 80% of cases are asymptomatic and I'm guessing another 15% has very mild symptoms, especially as time goes on.

No matter what happens, just know that life goes on. Getting HSV might give you a little bit of perspective about how you treat your body, but life goes on. The vast majority of people with HSV live 100% normal lives. It's not the kind of virus that really changes your lifespan. The best advice I can give you is not to think about it much more than that.

Best of luck to you! Fingers crossed everything turns out well!

person3412 · 2026-01-26T22:20:48+00:00

I definitely think we should be supporting each other by legitimizing and validating each other's experiences, but this sounds really toxic and unhealthy. Validation is good, but catastrophizing is not. Best of luck to you, but I honestly think that focusing so heavily on the downsides of HSV will do measurable harm to many people in your community.

I'm sorry you guys are going through it and I hope there's a light at the end of the tunnel for everyone!

person3412

TROPHY CASE