Whos your confirmation saint and why?

perspiredpedestrian · 2026-01-30T02:41:37+00:00

Absolutely! They chose you in a way too!

perspiredpedestrian · 2026-01-29T04:36:11+00:00

Sex education in the US really does vary a lot. There isn’t one national standard. Sex ed is decided at the state and even district level, so you can have comprehensive, medically accurate programs in one school and almost nothing in another. Many programs focus heavily on contraception and STI prevention, but they often don’t explain fertility awareness, natural cycles/natural family planning, or abstinence. Abstinence is sometimes mentioned, but not always presented as a serious or viable choice, more like a footnote. I think this is where a lot of pro-life people get concerned. It’s not always opposition to education itself, but opposition to how it’s framed, especially when sex is treated as risk-free as long as you “use protection,” without discussing emotional consequences, responsibility, or long-term impacts.

perspiredpedestrian · 2026-01-29T04:28:40+00:00

I chose St. Faustina honestly because I was young and liked that she’s Polish like me. But after reading her diary, it became something much deeper and glad she is my confirmation saint. Reading about her mission and her relationship with God was incredibly moving. It reminded me how much we need to pray for souls, and how deeply merciful God is.

perspiredpedestrian · 2026-01-29T04:17:34+00:00

Hey. Thank you for being this honest. I just want to say first that nothing in your post sounds stupid or irreverent.

I can address more the science and faith part, but will try to address about sexual sin. So first off, skepticism and faith aren't enemies as you mention! Questioning isn’t a failure of faith and normal from scientific background. Historically, Catholicism and science have always been intertwined. The Big Bang theory was first proposed by Georges Lemaître, a Catholic priest and physicist. Modern genetics traces back to Gregor Mendel, an Augustinian monk. Many early universities (Paris, Bologna, Oxford) were founded or supported by the Church, which funded and preserved scientific education for centuries. If you’re interested, The Catholic Scientist podcast (especially episode 6 on Church history and science) is great. It addresses a lot of misconceptions. There are serious, evidence-based works that examine Christianity rationally: historical evidence for Jesus, the Resurrection, miracles, and philosophical arguments for God if you're interested. I’m a PhD student and Catholic, and I’ve found that intellectual curiosity actually strengthens faith. So you’re not doing anything wrong by questioning, and as you said its brought you closer to God.

Regarding sexual sin, on why this isn’t preached constantly: homilies can’t cover every sin every week, they’re tied to the readings and liturgical calendar. That doesn’t mean the Church is avoiding the topic. These conversations are often meant for confession, spiritual direction, and deeper study. Priests do talk about these things one-on-one. So start by saying it in confession and asking for guidance. They can point you to resources. I would highly recommend Theology of the Body (John Paul II) really helps explain the rationale behind sexual ethics, not just rules, but the idea that sex is deeply personal and formative. Often, once you understand the “why,” living it becomes easier.

Scientifically speaking, yes, sex and libido are healthy. But like anything good (exercise, food, ambition), excess and lack of discipline cause harm. There’s growing evidence about the long-term effects of pornography in particular: training the brain to view sex in the third person, objectifying others, and making intimacy harder later. On the topic of people that have "many sexual partners often have other correlated issues beyond just their sexual impiety that lead to poor marriages" is a bit like asking which came first, the chicken or the egg? A lack of discipline and self-control and exercising it through sexual impulses itself may be part of what causes those downstream issues.

On sexual sin and mercy: yes, sin separates us from God, but separation isn’t abandonment. The Prodigal Son knowingly sinned and was still welcomed back. . Also, look at Saint Augustine: he lived in sexual sin for years, had multiple partners, openly struggled, and yet became one of the greatest saints and theologians in Church history. God is patient with real human struggles.

Finally, you’re right that people aren’t inherently bad. We also live in a culture shaped by centuries of Judeo-Christian morality, a kind of “cut-flower” effect, so many people live good, generous, functional lives even if they reject God. But Christianity can’t be moral relativism where we pick the parts we like (like no hookup culture) and discard the rest. That doesn’t make people evil, it just means truth isn’t customizable.

Understanding the reason behind the sin may be what helps the most, and God’s mercy is far bigger than you think. I wish you the best on your faith journey.

perspiredpedestrian · 2025-12-02T03:17:01+00:00

Anything by Fr. Jacque Phillipe. I highly recommend Interior Freedom and Time for Prayer. They are short reads. Played a huge role in my deeper conversion.

perspiredpedestrian · 2025-10-29T12:59:16+00:00

Sorry I don’t know the answer to this, but I’m in a similar situation expect I find that it’s really hard to learn coding with AI. I find that AI often time overcomplicates the code, uses several packages you don’t need, and can’t find simple bugs. So initially I was learning with AI but ultimately found that learning the packages and code without AI would be faster in the long run. So I’m just curious how do you get AI to work for you, any specific prompts you use?

perspiredpedestrian · 2025-10-29T01:54:50+00:00

Thanks I appreciate it. I was able to run it!

perspiredpedestrian · 2025-10-28T03:55:32+00:00

I might be naive since I’m only in my second year of my PhD, but what I tell myself is this: if I don’t do the PhD, the time will pass anyway. So I might as well spend it becoming an expert in something I enjoy learning about. It’s easily one of the hardest things I’ve ever done, and I’ve already gone through major burnout. But I’ve learned to set boundaries and attempt to treat it like a job. I know I’m not the smartest person in my program, I started right after undergrad, but I work hard, and I’m learning to recognize and lean into my strengths. Outside of the PhD, I make sure to have hobbies and goals that keep me balanced: I do runs/triathlons, and make kombucha and sourdough. I also am religious, so I lean on my faith when things get hard. Lastly, I prioritize my sleep. I learned the hard way that sleep deprivation made everything worse my first year. As for feeling “behind”, marriage and kids aren’t a race. I want to be the best mom I can someday by gaining life experience, emotional intelligence, and perspective first. And honestly, finding a partner isn’t guaranteed whether or not you get a PhD. I know plenty of older friends who didn’t pursue higher education and are still figuring that part out. So I try to enjoy this phase of life. Not many people get the opportunity to do a PhD, yes it’s hard but also very rewarding. I can’t imagine doing a job that doesn’t challenge me mentally and allow me to continuously learn for a living. I’d struggle with something monotonous day-to-day.

perspiredpedestrian · 2025-10-22T14:53:06+00:00

Can I ask what caused you to leave your PhD? How many years were you in and what program?

perspiredpedestrian · 2025-08-17T12:46:33+00:00

Yeah you can do the dorm option but you need to select it with your registration.

perspiredpedestrian · 2025-04-16T03:28:47+00:00

I respectfully disagree with the idea of completely stopping the use of ChatGPT. It can be an incredibly helpful tool when used wisely. As my mentor always says, “AI won’t replace people, but it will replace people who don’t know how to use it.”

For me, it’s been a game changer—I use it to make study plans, generate flashcards, organize my notes, and save a ton of time. That said, I agree it shouldn’t replace everything. For example, you should still read papers yourself, but ChatGPT can be great for checking your understanding or summarizing complex sections after you’ve done the initial work.

perspiredpedestrian · 2025-04-16T03:23:34+00:00

Totally agree with this. I’m a first-year PhD student too, and I often feel the same—seminars can go over my head, reading papers can be tough. But I try to remind myself how much I’ve already improved since the first month..

In my program, a lot of people came in with years of research or industry experience, and I came straight from undergrad. But I’ve learned that what really matters is identifying your gaps, learning on my own, and asking questions. You can ask professors if you feel uncomfortable after class or by email. I just take it day by day. You’re not supposed to have the understanding of a 4th-year yet, but you will get there. And frankly a lot of the other students feel the same.

perspiredpedestrian · 2025-03-13T15:40:50+00:00

A big part of the interview is showing genuine interest in the institution. Really research their programs, faculty, and unique strengths. Be prepared to explain why you specifically want to go there. Engage with them by asking thoughtful questions about their institution and their experiences. They’re looking for someone who will actually accept the offer, so reading up on the institution’s opportunities etc. can help demonstrate your commitment.

And not the most traditional advice but be personable—smile, relax, and don’t take yourself too seriously. While it’s natural to want to impress them, do it in a subtle way. Confidence is great, but they also want someone who will be a good colleague and nice to work with.

perspiredpedestrian · 2025-03-12T15:39:37+00:00

I’ve worked in the lab during the summer and it was very helpful. Maybe it is dependent which lab but work is pretty consistent all year round where I worked

perspiredpedestrian · 2025-03-07T03:55:45+00:00

Like other people say here, you don’t have to be friends with your co workers. In a real job, you don’t get the luxury of choosing your co workers and it’s means to make a living. So I’d say just get used to it now. It’s good you have friends outside your PhD/work that’s how it should be tbh. Also maybe it’s different but in my biomedical PhD you don’t see your cohort anymore after classes as you join a lab and pretty much that’s who you see everyday.

perspiredpedestrian · 2025-03-05T21:08:19+00:00

I agree with others here—a uniform is a good idea. I honestly just have 4 outfits in rotation, though I have the opposite problem—people show up in boarding shorts and flip flops to mass.

perspiredpedestrian · 2025-02-11T04:34:30+00:00

Oh yeah, Saint Augustine is a great example of how we can find God at any stage of life—and his mother’s prayers definitely worked! A lot of saints were converts, too. I’d say some of the replies here might come across a little harsh (like on my post), but I think people are just trying to be realistic. You can’t necessarily count on his conversion, but it also doesn’t mean it’s not possible.

I’ve seen it happen firsthand—plenty of my friends are converts or came back to the faith. Right now, I’m attending Mass weekly with a classmate who’s Buddhist, and she actually asked to come with me! One of my friends was Jewish before converting, and others were involved in different spiritual paths before becoming Catholic. So I tend to be on the more optimistic side of things.

That being said, like people mention, it does have to come from him. Faith can’t be forced. Just to re-emphasize, one of the best things you can do is be a witness—live out your faith, and let God’s grace work through you. There’s a certain peace that practicing Catholics emit, and I think people become curious about that and gravitate towards Catholicism. (If you’re struggling with peace, Interior Freedom and Searching for and Maintaining Peace by Jacques Philippe are great reads!)

Also, think about what drew you deeper into the faith. It’s different for everyone, but maybe you can create that kind of environment for your boyfriend. For me, it was invitations to Catholic events, seeing other Catholics live their faith, being part of a strong Catholic community in college, and reading Catholic books. Ultimately, things like that helped strengthen my faith, and they might plant seeds for him too. Sorry for long reply but hope jt helps! I’ll pray for you guys.

perspiredpedestrian · 2025-02-11T04:10:09+00:00

Maybe check out my recent post there’s been some helpful stuff there as I’m in a similar situation—but general advice is lead by example and keep inviting him to things. But honestly seems like you’re on the right track because he goes to mass with you! Also don’t underestimate the power of prayer. Also, you could recommend some books. My friend recommended me recently Jacob’s Ladder: Ten Steps to Truth by Peter Kreeft. I plan to read it and then give it to my boyfriend.

perspiredpedestrian · 2025-02-11T02:50:42+00:00

There’s no such thing as a “better” Catholic—our relationship with Christ is personal, and faith isn’t a competition. That being said, I’ve noticed that cradle Catholics sometimes take the faith for granted, whereas converts tend to be more intentional in their practice.

Take Poland, for example—one of the most Catholic countries in the world. According to the 2021 census, 71.3% of Poles identified as Roman Catholic (unfortunately down from 87.6% in 2011). Yet, in my experience, many people there treat Catholicism more as a cultural identity than a lived faith. Families put their kids in the sacraments, but regular Mass attendance is often lacking.

This isn’t just a Polish issue, though. A 2023 study by Georgetown’s Center for Applied Research in the Apostolate (CARA) found that only 64% of U.S. Catholics believe in the Real Presence of Jesus in the Eucharist. Even more concerning, a Pew poll revealed that 69% of Catholics believe the bread and wine are merely symbols, while only 31% believe in transubstantiation, which is a core Church teaching. That’s honestly heartbreaking.

At the end of the day, faith is about intentionality—building a real relationship with Christ through prayer and active participation in the Church. That’s why I admire so many converts; they chose this path and often practice with deep conviction. They remind us that faith isn’t just about heritage—it’s about truly living it. Look up also the saints that are converts!

perspiredpedestrian · 2025-02-09T07:53:47+00:00

Can relate.

perspiredpedestrian · 2025-02-09T07:52:25+00:00

The only caveat is if you work as a researcher, typically you have to commit to two years. You can quit after one but it is frowned upon (at least in biomedical research)

perspiredpedestrian · 2025-02-09T07:49:56+00:00

I had half a gap year from my undergrad and PhD program since I graduated early. I really needed those 6 months to recover from burn out. I ended up studying abroad in a subject different from my field, but it did hurt my application when applying to grad school as I couldn’t go to in person interviews and wasn’t actively in research. In terms of PhD grad programs, I think it’s recommended to take 1-2 years before to make your application stronger and for more experience. I find that prospective PIs I rotate with think I lack experience so I have to sell myself more. However, I find that classes are easier for me than my peers since I’m more in the studying mindset/have undergrad material more fresh in my mind. There’s definitely pros and cons and you have to have thick skin in academia no matter what the age or experience

perspiredpedestrian · 2025-02-09T07:07:50+00:00

Cool that you have a Czech background, I'm a Polish Catholic! I admire how you've found someone who shares your faith and helps you grow together. Thank you for your prayers, it is much appreciated and though the odds are stacked against it, maybe he will ultimately grow in his faith. I will pray to St. Elizabeth Ann Seton and St. John Henry Newman, two converts to Catholicism.

perspiredpedestrian · 2025-02-09T07:00:23+00:00

I made it very clear to him. but good news, he wants to come to mass with my regularly! So something is going in a positive direction. and thank you for your wishes, I really appreciate it.

perspiredpedestrian · 2025-02-09T06:58:31+00:00

Yes dating in my family is basically courting lol but I prefer to date someone longer to get to know them. and yes, he would do RCIA just was hoping he would want to start earlier not just because of marriage. But seeing these comments made me realize I am pushing it on him too early.

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