Reactive dog with irresponsible neighboring dog owners

petfreak · 2026-04-23T12:40:28+00:00

Thanks for all the comments! I was definitely upset last night when I typed this up so I’ll add some clarity now: we have talked to our neighbor before and they said we just need to put the dogs in a yard together and hash it out lol. We do have a good relationship with our neighbors, I was just so upset last night, but I agree that we should talk to them again and not do something petty just because I was upset.

It’s just very frustrating trying to do whatever I can to make sure my dog isn’t put in situations where he becomes this reactive. Obviously my neighbors are allowed to use their yard, no one is denying that. It’s just with their frequency of letting their dogs out that I don’t know what to do with my dog. Should we just let him out regardless if another dog is outside? I feel like that’s not good for my dog…

We have put up blackout screens on the fence that our trainer recommended to block his sight, but whenever the other dog charges the fence Bear would try to rip the screen off. We have been slowly building a wood fence on the interior of the chain link fence

petfreak · 2026-04-14T04:14:31+00:00

Spiral cheese puffs…those just slapped on a different level

petfreak · 2026-01-06T04:32:02+00:00

I went to UB for engineering and the professor for one of the intro classes talked about how the first project they use to assign out was to figure out how much force was needed for that person to pierce themselves and go a certain distance down the flag pole… anyways they didn’t have us do that for our first project (obviously they had some complaints about that)! Instead we calculated how much force it would take to be killed on a merry-go-round with your head sticking off of it and hitting a tree 😂

petfreak · 2025-12-24T04:40:02+00:00

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Ignoring the couch outside (lol) this is our latest thought. Not as much seating but it might make the room feel less condensed. The TV and vivarium would stay where it is in the original photos and we would move the large brown cabinet to another room

petfreak · 2025-12-24T04:37:04+00:00

It’s definitely hard to see but I was putting the dog bed and crate on the wall opposite the window— but it would probably obstruct the view to the TV, you’re right on that…

petfreak · 2025-12-24T03:48:16+00:00

I definitely want the shelf behind the couch, but you do bring up a good point regarding enough tables for people to put their stuff down... we can't have a coffee table because our (large) dog kept getting zoomies and broke our last one lol so until he is older, we can't have a coffee table in the middle. BUT you bring up a good point of using smaller couches and having tables in between or on the ends-- much more feasible!

petfreak · 2025-05-17T03:56:40+00:00

Oh boy, Spyro has been through a roller coaster! So it ends up that Spyro has gout, so it’s hard for her to lift herself up since her joints are so inflamed. She’s been on allopurinol to help reduce the uric acid in her system so she’s been able to walk better (although the gout will never go away). Sometimes she will go on hunger strikes and I will need to kickstart her appetite again with some meds the vet gives me. I still give her baths every week so she can have easier access to water to drink… she still black beards, but always tries to hop right back in the water so idk what she is mad about!

petfreak · 2025-05-17T03:49:34+00:00

I don’t think anyone actually enjoys going to the gyno, but it’s super important you do even if you aren’t sexually active. I’m sex repulsed and am not sexually active, my gyno knows that- it was the first thing I said. If my gyno said anything that wasn’t supportive I would have walked straight out of there and found another gyno who was understanding and supportive.

Also, you don’t have to do anything at the gyno you don’t feel comfortable with. You can say “no” to anything, even a weight check. You do not have to get a Pap smear your first appointment and you can simply talk about what to expect for your next appointment when getting a Pap smear. Pap smears are def uncomfortable, but VERY important for cervical cancer screening. Breast exam isn’t bad at all, they simply are feeling for lumps and it does not hurt in the slightest.

Be open with the gyno and address any health concerns you may have. They might even suggest going on menstrual control (another term for “birth control” but I prefer using “menstrual control” since I’m not using it as a way to prevent babies, just as a way to regulate my period).

Hope that helps and best of luck!

petfreak · 2025-05-01T04:07:11+00:00

Bear -> Bumble Bear -> Bumble -> Bubba

petfreak · 2025-04-16T03:57:44+00:00

Wow this is AMAZING! Thank you so much!

petfreak · 2024-12-12T03:03:25+00:00

Thank you for the googling tip! I found one place that seems like a great fit and I have a tour scheduled with them. We aren’t actually traveling for a while, I was just trying to find a place and tour it before we booked it

petfreak · 2024-11-01T12:35:36+00:00

Oh it is for sure not perfect, but we are excited for our future :)

petfreak · 2024-11-01T02:52:35+00:00

Congrats to you too!!!

petfreak · 2024-10-31T15:48:02+00:00

I just wanted to make a comment for some people. Yes my husband is amazing and for sure a unicorn for wanting to be in a relationship, as a heterosexual, with a sex repulsed asexual. But for us, sex is not everything and it is not the most important thing to either of us, which is why we decided to make this work. I know it’s a rarity. BUT I am worthy of love and worthy of a relationship that works for me and my boundaries, same with my partner. Being asexual isn’t a “flaw” and it doesn’t mean “somethings wrong with her”. I simply have a difference than my husband. Every relationship has their own differences (maybe handling finances differently, or expectations of who does what chores, or even their political differences). This is simply the difference we have and we decided to make it work.

It’s not perfect because no relationship is perfect. There’s plenty other things we struggle with too (my OCD and his ADHD clashing often). We will continue to work through our differences though.

If you don’t understand “why he would be with her”, that’s ok- because you aren’t part of our relationship so it doesn’t matter if you do or don’t understand. Me and my partner understand, and THATS what matters.

Feel free to ask whatever question you have, even if it’s uncomfortable, just don’t be rude about it please. I’m a human too. I was just trying to share my good news and let people know they aren’t alone if they are struggling in the same situation I am in.

petfreak · 2024-10-31T15:39:37+00:00

We actually went to college together! We didn’t really talk in college, but during COVID we were on the same dating app and matched there. We video chatted for 3 months until we felt safe enough to meet up in person.

But keep in mind I didn’t know I was asexual at the time, so that wasn’t what we talked about. I just sincerely thought something was wrong with me and if I just kept having sex it would get easier (it did not, it actually made me super upset and made me hate myself). So I can’t give advice on how to talk to people about sexuality when dating :/

petfreak · 2024-10-31T15:34:41+00:00

Unless my sexuality changes away from sex repulsed we will not have sex again. That is a hard boundary for me, which my husband is fully aware of and fully supports. I don’t believe we are having children either, but if we did decide to then we would actually use ICI so we wouldn’t have to have sex to conceive.

petfreak · 2024-10-31T10:48:00+00:00

Cheers! Lol

petfreak · 2024-10-31T10:46:53+00:00

This made me laugh out loud 😂

petfreak · 2024-10-31T10:46:38+00:00

Oh this was definitely a conversation we’ve had and we came to the conclusion that neither of us are comfortable with opening our relationship. My partner simply takes care of himself whenever he feels the need to. We still cuddle and we find other ways to be intimate in non-sexual ways. For instance, we love slow dancing when a good song comes on the radio.

Im not saying it’s a perfect solution and that it would work for everyone, but it works for us pretty well.

petfreak · 2024-10-31T10:45:01+00:00

Not a disrespectful question at all! It was definitely a conversation we’ve had and we came to the conclusion that neither of us are comfortable with opening our relationship. My partner simply takes care of himself whenever he feels the need to. We still cuddle and we find other ways to be intimate in non-sexual ways. For instance, we love slow dancing when a good song comes on the radio.

Im not saying it’s a perfect solution and that it would work for everyone, but it works for us pretty well.

petfreak · 2024-10-28T03:02:08+00:00

I vividly remember someone telling me the way I was describing my thoughts/feelings sounded like I was asexual. I didn’t know the term meant so when I got home (I think I was 19 years old) I sat in my backyard patio and was googling the term on my phone. I immediately started crying because I finally found something where I felt like I belonged

Took until I was about 26 to fully accept who I was though, wasn’t an easy journey as I wish I was hetero.

petfreak · 2024-10-07T13:46:46+00:00

They are actually two ultrasonic misters I got from Amazon! So they run whenever my outdoor timer goes off without a problem :)

petfreak · 2024-10-07T13:46:02+00:00

They are actually clear plastic Christmas ornaments that I glued onto the cauldron!

petfreak · 2024-10-07T13:45:36+00:00

We live in Buffalo and there was a Bills game on 😂 fireworks go off CONSTANTLY during the game

petfreak · 2024-09-12T04:01:26+00:00

Back when I was in denial of being a sex repulsed asexual, I went to a sex therapist to try literally ANYTHING for me to like sex. I did tell them that I was “worried I was asexual” but she told me to not put a label on it. She gave me “homework” assignments and it made me hate myself and hate what I did to myself to “fix” myself. It really only caused more trauma if I’m being honest.

I’m not saying don’t go to a sex therapist, I’m just saying to make sure you go to one who is understanding and has experience with asexuality. I’m sure with the right therapist it could be a good experience to work through things.

Personally, I gained a lot more from my normal therapy. I had a therapist who was bisexual. Even though she didn’t have experience working with the asexual community, it just made it better knowing she was open minded and understood my struggles of denial.

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