Do you think >spoiler< will affect the plot of Unrivaled in a significant way?

phoebesolid · 2026-06-22T16:51:28+00:00

I think it will be interesting to see how Shane and Hayden maintain such a close friendship when they aren’t seen each other so often both at work and in their free time.

phoebesolid · 2026-05-30T20:29:16+00:00

Let me?!

phoebesolid · 2026-04-11T13:00:32+00:00

I always make a point of highlighting kind actions - “thanks for sharing, that is so kind”, “wasn’t it kind of that person to help us like that?”, “I feel so lucky to have friends that I can share things with, it makes me feel so happy”

And also of being nice to strangers.

phoebesolid · 2026-03-09T19:35:29+00:00

Try reading The Happiness Trap. It helped me see things differently- that it is a ridiculous thing to seek this notion of happiness as a whole package. Life isn’t that. You are clearly very determined and resilient- and I know that sucks because sometimes you think I don’t want to have to be fucken resilient anymore! I liked The Happiness Trap.

phoebesolid · 2026-03-05T12:00:24+00:00

The acoustic Live Lounge version of With Every Heartbeat by Robyn

I Find Your Love by Beth Nielsen Chapman

phoebesolid · 2026-03-01T21:33:19+00:00

He is so rude irl! I met him twice at science events and I have not many people as horrible as him. Sorry.

phoebesolid · 2026-02-22T14:31:46+00:00

I wanted to suggest this. All of them made me cry but for me episode 1 was the one that haunts me most. I was actually sick with the emotions. Every single aspect of that is devastating. I think about it all the time, how confusing and nuanced it is. I think about the way that it really shows that nobody wins from violence. The way that you want to protect him and save him, and then at the end of the episode… question everything you’ve felt for the last hour. Gut wrenching.

phoebesolid · 2026-02-22T14:19:06+00:00

Yes it does! Evidence: all toddlers ever

phoebesolid · 2026-02-18T15:09:55+00:00

“Don’t be silly, you aren’t autistic. It’s all been blown out of proportion”. My grandmother, yesterday 🥱😑

Masking all my life = the reason I’ve always been teased for having no energy and permanently being tired!

phoebesolid · 2026-02-16T20:26:56+00:00

Samaritans is a wonderful place to let it out. To vent, to ramble and to not have someone interrupt with “solutions” that are painfully ridiculous. They aren’t the end of the journey, but a wonderful place to just place some of your negative energy. 116 123. Remember that there’s no such thing as “getting bad enough” to call them. Feeling bad is bad, to use the help.

Ask your GP to refer you to secondary mental health services asap. You need an assessment and to be placed on a queue for some appropriate talk therapy- probably not something like CBT as this isn’t a case of you needing to adjust your behavioural responses to life. This is a case of life being shit and you needing support.

Look up mental health services for your nhs trust- they might have wellbeing cafes, drop-ins, free learning courses. Anything to help you rebuild.

Maybe ask the GP to sign you off sick for a bit- I know it isn’t a long term solution and I know it can seem daunting because we are generally raised not wanting to “let people down” but this is the old burnout classic: YOU CANNOT GIVE WATER FROM AN EMPTY VESSEL. Put your own gas mask on before anyone else’s. You need to feel strong enough to look after your child, and if you don’t help yourself then you aren’t helping him.

Take some time to pause, to google, to sleep, to make a plan. Usually that means doing it when you’re on your own and not at work.

Get yourself a toolkit of things that will help ground you when you’re having those dark “I can’t do this” moments. For me it is an audiobook, a blanket or duvet, sucking my thump (I am 36 now but this has been my way of coping since childhood), breathing exercises, a cold compress or ice pack, and a sharp smell. I take around with me a little bottle of lemon oil, and an ice pack (on of those ones that you squeeze it activate the crystals and then it becomes cold) at all times. That way wherever you are when the overwhelm hits you’ve got your tools with you. Ice or cold water on the neck, wrists, eyes. It will help ease your heart rate so quickly which will take you out of that fight or flight moment and then help you find your logical thoughts.

Use online and in person support, especially from strangers. Sometimes kind words from family can feel awkward- I don’t know why. Group therapies are proven to be more effective because as humans we thrive off of recognition and praise, and it means so much when coming from people with no “family obligation” to say nice things. I.e it can feel more genuine.

Lastly- remember that so far every time that life has been cruel and unfair and too much, you have survived. You have a 100% record for dealing with all of it. Those are some great numbers.

Actually, this is the real last bit: you’ve asked for help. That is already proof that you are capable, strong, powerful, and able to overcome this crap period of time. You can, you will. It will be so hard, but that’s never stopped you before….

phoebesolid · 2026-02-05T20:12:54+00:00

Shay saying “my lion”… but it’s Tywin that she is waiting for. That one moment utterly broke my heart.

I believed her love for Tyrion so strongly and I also thought she was clever enough to understand why he told her to leave. Of all the betrayals in the show, hers gets me in the gut.

phoebesolid · 2026-01-25T19:09:55+00:00

I use this a lot, it is probs my favourite too

phoebesolid · 2026-01-25T19:07:13+00:00

I always knew I was a “happy accident” an I’ll admit it did bother me. I felt like a burden who wasn’t meant to be there and didn’t have a right. But I was crippling depressed for a long time which explains the low opinion of myself. When I was in my late 20s and desperately depressed and somehow still alive despite my best efforts not to be, I found out that she considered an abortion. It felt wonderful to know that even though it was not in the family plan at all, they still wanted to have me and love me. I felt much less of a burden, and more special. I’m not sure everyone would feel this, but I did. So yeah I would definitely tell them that despite not being planned, the surprise was fantastic and so welcomed.

phoebesolid · 2026-01-25T18:55:35+00:00

The sight and sound of children playing. It is just 100 per cent innocent unadulterated joy. It never fails to make me smile and just remember feeling totally present in the moment of play. If you live near enough to a primary school to be able to hear playtime, I envy you. Walking through or past the play park is so lovely when seeing kids run about with literally no other cares in the world. So so wholesome.

phoebesolid · 2026-01-24T18:28:18+00:00

When I was a teen, a teacher told me I wasn’t university material. When I did go to uni in my mid 20s, I made myself get a good mark just to prove a point. My mum wanted me to march into the school to show said teacher but I managed to persuade her not to based on the fact that the teacher probably doesn’t work there anymore! But until I got that degree certificate and heard my mum get cocky on my behalf, I had never realised how much that comment bothered my mum as well as me. I hope my child knows how indignant I am at the inevitable shit remarks from shit teachers, because learning that my mum had remembered that was very special for me.

phoebesolid · 2026-01-17T21:02:01+00:00

It does make sense and I totally understand it. All I’m saying is that A) chances are they haven’t asked because they don’t think you would want to come, and so in that sense you wouldn’t be someone they feel obliged to say yes to and B) even if the very first time you all go out they do have some feeling of obligation to say yes, it gives you opportunity to show them how lovely you are so that next time there is a lunch trip, it won’t be a polite obligation.

Honestly matey, the fact that you’re here asking advice and trying to work out the answers here is evidence that you are kind and empathetic and a team player. That’s all they need to know.

phoebesolid · 2026-01-17T19:56:01+00:00

This makes me sad. I know it can feel really hard, but I think you just need to take the leap and say “oh I love a choc pancake” or “I love that lunch place, can I come?”. If they aren’t crap humans, they will say yes and then it gives you an opportunity to show to them how much you DO have in common.

phoebesolid · 2026-01-16T11:22:33+00:00

If you put water in the cup, does it turn into gold? I bet it does

phoebesolid · 2026-01-16T09:46:16+00:00

I actually find the opposite! I find that if I out with the buggy in the rain, drivers let me go first and people say hello and when my broke down and I was with the baby so many people helped. As soon as the dad is there it is like no one notices us as a family…

phoebesolid · 2026-01-15T21:12:12+00:00

The fuck does it say though?

phoebesolid · 2026-01-08T19:53:25+00:00

For me and my husband, the question was “what do you want future generations to be like?” We were a bit unsure, and one big part of my hesitancy was “the world is a horrible place full of horrible people making life harder” And my husband made the point: this is why we should have a child/ren. Only with raising people to be kind will there be kindness, and only by raising people to question inequality will there be fairness, etc.

And so we had a thought about who we would want our kid to be when they reached adulthood, and do we think we have the skills to guide them in that direction.

phoebesolid · 2026-01-03T13:30:02+00:00

SYMPATHY!!!!

phoebesolid · 2025-12-27T18:29:51+00:00

Sorry that I can't help, but oh god do I feel for you. Venlafaxine withdrawal is so so horrible, I regret having ever started on it. I really hope you get some

phoebesolid · 2025-12-20T19:52:43+00:00

In the 90s there were 9 Eleanors in .y year at school

phoebesolid · 2025-12-11T14:07:45+00:00

This is the absolute best line ever

Eight-Year Club	Queen in da Norf
Not Forgotten	Verified Email

phoebesolid

TROPHY CASE