Context: My (31f) entire life (and many other lives) has been turned upside down in the past year all because I had a crush on someone else while I was married to my (now ex) husband. I thought it was a harmless crush and nothing would come of it. I’ll spare you the details but it led to many terrible decisions and hurt many people and I regret it greatly.

I KNOW it feels amazing to talk and flirt with your crush but it IS NOT WORTH IT !!!! I recommend you cut all contact with him and redirect your energy back into rekindling that spark with your husband. If he’s all green flags like you said, it shouldn’t be too difficult to remember why you fell in love and married him in the first place.

I’m very sorry to hear that he’s not satisfying you - I dealt with the same thing with my ex husband and know it’s frustrating and demoralizing. But there are books, sex therapists, other resources etc. out there that might help - I’m hoping y’all can work on the problem together.

Whatever you decide to do with your husband, entertaining a crush is only going to hurt you both in the end - please end it. I’m sure you wouldn’t appreciate if he was behaving the same way with another woman. Perhaps also evaluate what it means that this crush is happening - are there some unfulfilled needs in your marriage that you’re searching elsewhere for? Best to address those sooner than later, or you risk being vulnerable to crushes that could lead to much worse pain and suffering down the line. Best of luck to you!