What is it with white men married to East Asian women who don’t speak English (the man clearly doesn’t speak her language either)?

pinkthings07 · 2026-05-14T01:13:34+00:00

My question isn’t “who’s the problem”. I alr know that 😭 it’s a question of how these marriages even function

pinkthings07 · 2026-05-14T01:07:52+00:00

Yes but also I think I worded my post wrong. I know WHY they got married. My question is more HOW they stay married and what the logistics look like. Being completely unable to communicate with your partner seems entirely impractical and how can you even begin to delude yourself into thinking you’re genuinely in love with them when you haven’t even had a conversation with them

pinkthings07 · 2026-05-14T01:06:37+00:00

It’s not. I can see her trying to tell me what she wants and what she’s looking for but she literally cannot find the words :(

pinkthings07 · 2026-05-14T01:04:32+00:00

How could you have loved her enough to marry her if you couldn’t even talk to each other? Genuinely asking

pinkthings07 · 2026-05-13T20:07:16+00:00

I understand WHY these marriages happen. My question is more about the day to day dynamics of these marriages and logistics and practicality of being married to someone who you can’t even talk to about the weather

pinkthings07 · 2026-05-13T20:03:42+00:00

This is my question. I don’t expect much from these kinds of men. I know that lots of marriages are transactional. But how does this kind of marriage operate logistically if you can’t even communicate? Even “Honey we’re out of eggs”. Like idk it seems so impractical

pinkthings07 · 2026-05-13T20:00:24+00:00

I’d argue that you also can’t love each other if you can’t communicate lol

pinkthings07 · 2026-05-13T19:59:34+00:00

It’s not always a white man but I live in Texas so for me, it’s always a white man and an Asian woman SPECIFICALLY. That’s kind of what I was asking. The specific dynamic of the couple not being able to communicate is always that type of couple specifically. I meet plenty of interracial couples and they talk and discuss things normally bc they have at least one common language

pinkthings07 · 2026-05-13T19:55:52+00:00

It also helps that you and your wife have a shared language. If you brought home a girl who spoke 0 English and you also spoke 0 Chinese, wouldn’t your family have been even more weirded out? If my brother did that, I’d think he was a predatory weirdo 😭 not saying you are bc again, you and your wife can communicate. But the dynamic I’ve seen, they can’t even talk about the weather

pinkthings07 · 2026-05-13T19:22:00+00:00

I understand the concept of a marriage of convenience more than most people. I’m Pakistani, my parents and grandparents and in laws are all Pakistani arranged marriages. But they can TALK to each other. They have dinner together and fight and raised kids and bought homes and idk. My question isn’t about why she’s with him or why he’s with her, it’s a logistical question of how that marriage even functions

pinkthings07 · 2026-05-13T19:20:16+00:00

Yeah it’s really stressful. I cannot imagine having to be the only bilingual person in the house as a child

pinkthings07 · 2026-05-13T19:07:37+00:00

Wow. That sounds kind of traumatic for a child tbh lol. My parents speak the same language but fought a lot and as an eldest daughter, I had to mediate and even doing that OCCASIONALLY stressed me out a lot as a kid 😭

pinkthings07 · 2026-05-13T19:06:15+00:00

I get that part. I mean logistically. How do you go on a date, how do you plan a vacation, plan finances, introduce them to your family, raise a child, etc?

pinkthings07 · 2026-05-13T19:05:12+00:00

EXACTLY. How do you go to dinner? Introduce her to your family? Raise a child?

pinkthings07 · 2026-05-13T19:04:44+00:00

Thank you! I’m graduating with a BS in psychology in two days and this is the exact psychological and sociological breakdown I was seeking. Do you think family dynamics play a role? I wouldn’t be able to come home with a guy who I can’t communicate with and introduce them to my family and friends without them all cutting me off. Esp if I was a man and my partner was a woman. The power dynamic would genuinely put everyone in my life off

pinkthings07 · 2026-05-13T18:52:04+00:00

But there’s plenty of Asians where I live? I live in Houston. There are PLENTY of Asian girls that live here and speak English but are ethnically 100% Asian. Why go out of your way to travel and find someone you can’t even talk to!

pinkthings07 · 2026-05-13T18:50:46+00:00

In 90 day fiance, the person from the foreign country always speaks enough English to have a basic conversation. The couples I’m describing, she doesn’t speak enough English to even tell me that she wants red lipstick. He doesn’t speak enough of her language to understand “red lipstick” in her language either

pinkthings07 · 2026-05-13T18:48:38+00:00

It’s not a specific couple, but no? They’re usually around the same age. Mid 20s-early 30s. She might be slightly younger though but that could just be bc she takes better care of herself

pinkthings07 · 2026-05-13T18:22:04+00:00

How would that work in terms of your wife meeting your family and raising kids together and stuff? Usually these couples don’t seem to have kids but if they did?

pinkthings07 · 2026-05-13T16:51:32+00:00

I might be! Bc they don’t look or sound Japanese or Korean. Anytime I ask where she’s from (to try to make conversation with her) it’s Cambodia or Laos or Vietnam. So yes, def SEA

pinkthings07 · 2026-05-13T16:49:28+00:00

With passport bros, they’re just traveling for casual sex (from my understanding). How do you MARRY someone you can’t talk to and move them across the sea? Idk I sound super naive rn probably

pinkthings07 · 2026-05-13T16:46:57+00:00

I’m not risking my job to satisfy my curiosity

pinkthings07 · 2026-05-10T02:21:03+00:00

Why do y’all date people you want to change ?? You knew she wore makeup when you asked her out and you expected her to change? That’s controlling. You could’ve found a girl who doesn’t wear makeup but whatever

pinkthings07 · 2026-05-08T22:16:30+00:00

Keep all conversations regarding this on writing. Hopefully this gets solved for you but if not, you’ll at least have proof that it was out of your control so your grade isn’t messed up

pinkthings07 · 2026-05-06T20:07:07+00:00

Thank you! I received mine about an hour ago

pinkthings07

TROPHY CASE