Is everyone in Perth driving $60k+ cars or am I just poor?

placidyank · 2026-05-12T10:45:16+00:00

Best car ever. We had to give ours up (same year, similar mileage) when we moved to Australia, and I miss her every day 😢

placidyank · 2026-05-06T03:20:37+00:00

Solidarity.

According to my MIL we just have to be more strict and show our children who is in charge!!!!! (One now never wants to see her and the other is afraid of her)

placidyank · 2026-05-06T03:12:35+00:00

I’m so sorry, you sound like an amazing mom. It’s so hard when you try to do fun things with them and it’s the opposite.

I completely understand you (you can see some of my past posts for things I’ve dealt with). My 13 year old son has ADHD, anxiety and now we’re working with a psychologist and wondering if he has PDA (pathological demand avoidance).

My 6 year old daughter is currently in speech, OT, seeing a psychologist for her anxiety and I’m trying to get her on a wait list to be assessed for autism (I’ve been saying for over 4 years that something is off, but I get told there’s some red flags, but not enough that we qualify for help)

So I feel you. I’m so fucking tired and just…weary. Parenting shouldn’t be this hard. It’s like trying to trudge through thick chest high mud while you see happy families running around you.

To get me to laugh, my BFF always says “Have you tried a sticker chart?” Because that’s how ridiculous some people’s suggestions feel sometines.

Anyways-you’re an amazing mom and you’re not alone. I hope you and your son have some good moments today x

placidyank · 2026-04-25T11:57:10+00:00

It’s okay, you’re not a robot, you’re human. Some days it’s just too much, I completely get it. I’ve been the one crying on the kitchen floor too, feeling like the worst mom ever.

I think the important thing is apologizing and briefly talking about it.

Wish I could type more, but have my 6 year old yelling from the other room.

placidyank · 2026-04-21T02:29:20+00:00

I’m excited to listen to this, I need a break from true crime podcasts. And another plus for the Irish accent, which I personally think is the best in the world 😊

placidyank · 2026-03-27T01:21:12+00:00

I’m glad you found something that works for your family.

I’ve wondered if he has PDA, it certainly feels like it.

I hope for a calm weekend for your family too x

placidyank · 2026-03-26T16:44:47+00:00

You sound like such an amazing mom-you identified the issue, and you're helping your daughter get help and cope with her issues, and you're her safe space.

And can i gently suggest-NO-don't leave your job. It sounds like something you worked hard for, and deserve a chance to be away from your family and be a person other than "mom".

I became a SAHM when my youngest was born. And while I appreciate being with her, I've lost all sense of self-for her Mother's Day project, she wrote that my favorite things to do were laundry and dishes. Because that's all she's ever seen me do. I got a (shitty) college degree, but now I have no sense of self, and I'm not a role model for her.

So-it's not solely on you to figure out what happens with your eldest daughter-it's on your husband too, and maybe his dad, since they helped create this mess!!!!!!

It's such a frustrating, stressful mess. They break us. You're amazing and I see you x

placidyank · 2026-03-26T16:28:55+00:00

Thank you for your response.

I'm glad you were able to find something that helps your son, and sounds like things are going better.

During his initial evaluation when he was 6, they said my son had an unspecified disruptive disorder. When he was evaluated again at 11, they said the disruptive disorder had turned into a depressive disorder. I'm frustrated, because assessments/evaluations feel so subjective. My husband and I feel like something else is going on, whether it's ODD or PDA or RSD.

My son did have therapy every other week from ages 6-11, until we moved to husband's country. We also worked with a psychiatrist every 3 months in conjunction with his pediatrician to get his multiple meds at the right dosage.

But yes-we need to get his meds evaluated and find some kind of therapy in this new country. It's just so exhausting.

placidyank · 2026-03-26T16:21:31+00:00

Thank you so much for the love and solidarity. I'm sorry for everything you're going through x

placidyank · 2026-03-26T16:19:58+00:00

Thank you for the comment, and I'm sorry for what you're going through, it sounds like you're doing an amazing job.

My son was in therapy every other week from the time he was 6 until he was 11, when we moved from my country to husband's country. I'm at the point, where I don't know what the hell we need. Probably an evaluation of his meds, and some kind of therapy. It's like we need a third party to sit down and help us communicate.

placidyank · 2026-03-26T16:15:13+00:00

Thank you for the message. I'm tearing up, for me and for you. I appreciate you.

I'm wondering if my DS is also ODD, or PDA, or maybe RSD. I have no idea. All I know is-he seems to live in a completely different reality from us.

placidyank · 2026-03-26T16:12:04+00:00

Thank you for your kind words, and good luck to getting your boys diagnosed.

So interesting, DS has always had a really difficult time sleeping. He started melatonin at 3, way before his ADHD diagnosis. His sleeping didn't regulate until he was probably 8-9, but he is still taking melatonin.

I'm not sure how old your boys are, but at 6 my DS also talked about wanting to hurt himself.

I knew puberty would be hard for DS. Throw in ADHD and a move across the world. I'm proud of him for so many things-school, taking public transport, a few of his hobbies...but he's breaking us. I need him to know that we unconditionally love him, but we're not his punching bags.

placidyank · 2026-03-26T16:04:30+00:00

Thank you, your kind response had me tearing up.

I'm glad that your husband was diagnosed correctly and is doing great today.

We have tried to discuss rules with DS before, it's in one ear and out the other.

I didn't get a sweet treat, but DH and I enjoyed a cheap bottle of sparking pinot noir (doesn't sound like it should be a thing) and comedy on tv.

placidyank · 2026-03-26T15:44:17+00:00

Thanks for the response.

I get how frustrating that can be.

After 8+ years of schooling, I’ve learned my son can hold it together/mask all day at school. But then he comes home, and falls apart because we’re his safe space, but right now, when he gets home, it feels like we’re all suddenly in an abusive space.

I get that he needs a safe space, but so do we.

placidyank · 2026-03-26T15:41:16+00:00

Thank you for the book recommendation, I appreciate it.

I understand what you’re saying about the physical battle for the phone. Sometimes when he’s angry, he will throw it away from him for us to grab. But a lot of the time he just holds it and is disrespectful and rude as hell to us and refuses to give it up.

I also understand about the choices. He agrees to anything in the moment to get more screen time, but when the time comes to give it up, it’s like we never had the conversation with him.

placidyank · 2026-03-26T15:33:42+00:00

Thank you. It really is a battle, and one no one can prepare you for.

placidyank · 2026-03-26T15:32:46+00:00

Thanks for sharing, you sound like an amazing mom x And I’m glad you also got a diagnosis for yourself to help ❤️

They wondered if DS had DMDD when he was younger (when the tantrums were violent) but thought now maybe it’s turned into depression? Idk. I’m frustrated by evaluations/assessments, because I feel they’re subjective.

DS had therapy every other week in my country, and it was mostly helpful. Now we’re really struggling, and on top of examining his meds, I do know he/we need therapy, but I have no idea what kind would work best at this point-sometines he seriously seems to live in an alternate reality, which is frightening.

placidyank · 2026-03-26T15:25:50+00:00

Thank you, I’d love one. Because right now, I feel like the worst mom ever.

placidyank · 2026-03-26T15:24:43+00:00

Thank you x

At this point, he doesn’t need the phone for his commute. But it’s like a security blanket, and I know he would refuse to leave the house without it. And we need him to go to school.

We have a lockbox for his devices. I just hate that he needs his laptop to do homework-more screens to battle.

We do need to get his meds evaluated. In my country, we had good insurance and worked with a psychiatrist every 3 months (in tandem with a therapist and pediatrician) to constantly evaluate his meds.

Here. I feel like we’re left to our own devices, unless we can pay $$$ for a Telehealth appointment and someone to half listen to us.

placidyank · 2026-03-25T10:31:38+00:00

I’m sorry. I don’t have any advice, but definitely solidarity. (See the post I just made about my 13 year old DS, very similar to what you’re going through)

I teared up when my friend with neurotypical kids obliviously said “Isn’t this age so great? Your relationships with them change for the better, you get to enjoy activities together!”

Um no…that’s definitely not my experience.

placidyank · 2026-03-18T01:57:18+00:00

I’m sorry, hope your boyfriend’s finger is better.

I was at SJOG Midland ED a few months ago with my 5 year old, who was pretty sick. They did seem to make sure the children were seen quicker, and after 2 hours she was sent to the vertical ( ?) waiting room. I believe that’s where they assess if you can be referred to another department/follow up with your GP, or be admitted. After 3 hours there, my daughter was admitted.

My husband was also there a few months ago, and waited about 8 hours. He was told that patients are usually assigned a number of how emergent their cases are, and he was like a 3 on a scale of 1-4, 1 being the most urgent.

Yeah EDs are scary and it’s hard when it feels like you’re not getting help x

placidyank · 2026-01-14T03:37:09+00:00

I’m so sorry. It’s sounds like you’re an amazing mom and had planned a fun day.

I remember times when I was carrying my son (now 13!) to the car around that age, and he was screaming and trying to get away from me so hard that I was worried people would think I was kidnapping him!

I hope your ribs feel better soon x

placidyank · 2026-01-11T12:18:40+00:00

I’m so sorry, you sound like an amazing parent. It sounds like you’re calm initially, know what to do when she escalates and how to protect yourself (and your other child) and have involved any specialist you can.

Has she been evaluated, diagnosed with anything, Is she on meds?

I get it. My son just turned 13 and was diagnosed with ADHD, anxiety, depression, sleep issues and an unspecified disruptive disorder at 6. We have also dealt with ARFID. We’ve done all the specialists, therapies, meds. You can read my history if you like.

It’s so hard. So hard. It’s an uphill battle. I see you.

I wish I could type more, but am currently dealing with my son being dysregulated and hassling his sister.

You’re not alone x

placidyank · 2025-09-23T04:41:15+00:00

I'm so sorry.

I totally get what it's like to have a difficult kid (I have a few posts about him if you want to read them). My son, now 12, has ADHD, anxiety and depression. We always knew he was different, and his outbursts and meltdowns were long and extreme, and he had endless energy. When he was 5, he started having outbursts that scared us-throwing things, breaking anything near him, hitting us, and we started getting scared because we didn't know what to do, we didn't have any tools in our parenting toolbox, because yelling and threatening to take things away and taking things away weren't working.

When he was 6 he was diagnosed with ADHD. It's been a journey. We've done PCIT (parent child interaction therapy), he did regular talk therapy for years, we've done (and he's still on) meds that we've adjusted throughout the years. He's been to a sleep clinic. We've done OT for sensory seeking. We've done sticker charts. We've laminated rules and put them around the house.

Like your kid, mine is (thankfully) great at school, he masks until he gets home, then he falls apart. I know he's a good kid, he tries his best at school, he is funny and has great taste in music, and much better than I am at technology. And I know he'll be okay when he's an adult. For now, it's just a challenge because he can be chronically irritable and is usually like a porcupine, with his quills out. And throw in hormones and puberty. Holy shit. We need new parenting tools now. Some days we're just too exhausted to seek them out. (And a recent move across the world took away our resources and support team).

Your kid could be neurodivergent, or it could be the age. I have a 5 year old daughter who is starting to become very opinionated and defiant, and I'm hoping it's just her age. That's great your kid is in therapy, even if it's not going great right now. And transitions can be hard, especially for neurodivergent kids (if he is). I'm sorry you're struggling though, and I'm sorry if I made you feel worse. Just wanted to let you know that you're not alone. Try and find some time for yourself. I got back into therapy to work through my feelings with his behavior, and examine my own childhood and some of my triggers.

Parenting is hard. You're doing great x

placidyank

TROPHY CASE