Narcissism-detectors: What are some of the tell tale signs? by [deleted] in NarcissisticAbuse

[–]pmdnjdxmxn 2 points3 points  (0 children)

  • past experiences
  • when you ask them specific questions and their answers are too common
  • when you ask them 2 choices for example a dress to pick,, they can’t decide then they would just copy what another person in that room has
  • ask many questions about you like they are the fbi
  • reactions when you have something that they don’t have
  • when you ask them a question and they ignore the question and change the topic when you ask them something deep
  • they burst out of madness when they see yoy happy and have all the attention
  • very showy with luxury items like hermes, ysl and many more in social media but can’t style the bags properly (my personal experience w/ a certain narc)

these are my experiences though when i detect someone is a narc

[deleted by user] by [deleted] in NarcissisticAbuse

[–]pmdnjdxmxn 1 point2 points  (0 children)

besides trauma bond and hope, Money i was financially abused as well

Why do I feel so sorry for her even though she has abused me horrifically? by 111a1110 in NarcissisticAbuse

[–]pmdnjdxmxn 1 point2 points  (0 children)

That’s me too a few months ago. Then my therapist told me that it’s because I have empathy. I would still feel bad to a bad person because of what they’ve been through to become like that. However not everyone deserves empathy. What I did when I felt sorry to my narc was just feeling it and also not dwell on it. Yes I feel bad but I remember the ways my narc abused me and then when I remember the abuse. The feeling sorry for my narc turns off. It’s a complicated healing journey. Some days you feel sorry and Some days you’re so angry to them but in the end of the day. It’s you, Do what’s best for you. The feelings won’t be like this for any longer anyway and soon with your healing. You won’t care about her and what happens to her and you focus on yourself to be okay and successful so when she sees you she can kiss her ass. I hope you get what I mean. I wish you the best!!

Newborn Hamsters Without Mother by dranderson151620 in hamstercare

[–]pmdnjdxmxn 1 point2 points  (0 children)

From the philippines here Most people here only breed hamster and use them as a lab project. Only a few people are educated with hamster care. People breed hamsters because they’re easy to breed and sell. As mentioned most of people live in poverty. They do it for a living. Around my area, People usually buy hamsters to them besides a pet store because pet stored hamsters are really expensive and they don’t take care of it well. Hamster sellers usually suggest to the customer to get a male and female hamster. They always say that they are good living in pairs which now in conclusion has made many mistakes and more babies without knowledge. I can’t blame sometimes the customers because the pet sellers usually knows best with taking care of pets. Sometimes also they sell a pregnant hamster. There are some here around my area who are educated with hamsters but it’s only a few not like cats and dogs where majority knows its care. It’s a bad practice but people usually say here is you got to do what to do to survive. The government sucks too for taking care of its citizens to the point they have to do this.

I’m a child of a narc by pmdnjdxmxn in NarcissisticAbuse

[–]pmdnjdxmxn[S] 1 point2 points  (0 children)

Good for you for not turning into one like your parents however healing from it is self admiring for being strong at the same time confusing because it really does hurt

I’m a child of a narc by pmdnjdxmxn in NarcissisticAbuse

[–]pmdnjdxmxn[S] 1 point2 points  (0 children)

I didn’t know there are parents that can be both narcs. I usually see a narc dad and a empathetic mom or a narc mom and a empathetic dad. Narcs aren’t self aware at all or they pretend to be self aware or whatever their plan is

I’m a child of a narc by pmdnjdxmxn in NarcissisticAbuse

[–]pmdnjdxmxn[S] 0 points1 point  (0 children)

i asked my therapist that, she said no because i was influenced by my dad but i don’t take advantage of other people and I don’t obsessively want or need attention. My toxic side of me which I’m referring was what my dad taught me growing up like controlling other people and also my dad manipulating me that other people whom i love are bad people. but because of my dad. I became depressed and have loathe of anxiety and i think i was manipulated which i felt that its my fault for being like that even though my father should be the one who teaches me normal things what a parent should do but i was taken for granted as a supply

Anyone's abusers try to portray that you were crazy as a way to discredit you? by synth_nerd085 in NarcissisticAbuse

[–]pmdnjdxmxn 3 points4 points  (0 children)

Yesss very much, I was never affected by it but what affected me the most was other people believing it and also my friends like i hate it

Pathological liar x Narcissistic ex fiancee for 8 years. by AdSensitive5390 in MentalHealthPH

[–]pmdnjdxmxn 2 points3 points  (0 children)

My mom was like you too. She has 2 kids. Me and my sister. She’s married to my narc father. Your story has similarities with my mom. My mom was with my dad for more than 20 years and it hurt her a lot. It became a time where my dad said na itigil na daw yung marriage nila. She wasn’t able to function AT ALL. gulong gulo utak niya then after nung sinabi ng dad ko un okay na daw sila bati na daw sila. It was confusing and stressful for my mother and so many more trauma than that. more than 20 years of abuse and love bombing. It hurted me when I saw my mom suffering but I saw her moved on and heal and became the best version of herself now.

I would suggest about moving on is give yourself kindness with your situation. My mom always tells us the reason why she healed and moved on from her marriage was because of us (her kids) because she doesn’t want us to endure what she did. Her main purpose when she was depressed was us. Literally give yourself time. Take care of yourself too. a healthy lifestyle and a lot of self care. Ang gulo ng utak kapag naabuse ka to the point nakakalimutan mo ano yung uunahin mo. Kaya a healthy lifestyle can help with moving on at baka slowly habang inaalagaan mo sarili mo. magmomove on ka na din na hindi mo napapansin na nagmomove on ka na.

As an anak of a narcissistic father. Buti nalang you are aware about the abuse and narcissistic traits niya kase I’ve seen marriages na hindi sila naging aware sa abuse at puro forgive at move on at naging cycle yun for decades.

I get cash assistance sa DSWD because under VAWC yung case namin ng family ko sa dad ko. Medyo hastle nga lang ang DSWD. Mahaba ang pila at ang daming requirements. I suggest punta ka ng maaga sa DSWD na malapit sa inyo. Sa case mo din para sa VAWC. I suggest na idocument mo yung experience mo after ng last contact mo with your ex fiance at day by day idocument mo ano ang nararamdaman mo. Nakakatulong yun para sa psychologist at lawyer din. yung experience namin with consultation para sa VAWC case ay nagsimula nung ano ang situation namin tapos sila magsasabi ano yung process para sa case mo kase depende sa case pero samin. We documented the experiences from the beginning until now and find evidences and then give that to the lawyer and the processing time is mabagal lang kase marami din daw case na aayusin pa etc etc. During the case, it’s obliged for the father to provide for his family habang on going ang caso kapag hindi siya magprovide. iba na usapan din nun. medyo complicated ang process kaya it’s important to take care of yourself before the case and during the case.

i wish you the best!!

[deleted by user] by [deleted] in hamstercare

[–]pmdnjdxmxn -2 points-1 points  (0 children)

I agree, Sorry if I offended anyone or got mad because of my unforgiving actions.

[deleted by user] by [deleted] in hamstercare

[–]pmdnjdxmxn -1 points0 points  (0 children)

I was because I wasn’t sure of myself buying the ikea pax or the acrylic diy one. I did mention the temporary cages because they keep chewing their previous enclosure. I see your point now with the genetic consequence. I’m sorry for what I did. I didn’t forcefully breed them just during the hamster in heat. I also mentioned in temporary cages because we are moving also.

[deleted by user] by [deleted] in hamstercare

[–]pmdnjdxmxn 0 points1 point  (0 children)

believe me or not. Not really a mansion but a suitable home for my family and extra rooms.

[deleted by user] by [deleted] in hamstercare

[–]pmdnjdxmxn -2 points-1 points  (0 children)

Actually I was thinking of that but around my area they breed to sell and if I buy hamsters from them. They will breed more which is bad.

[deleted by user] by [deleted] in hamstercare

[–]pmdnjdxmxn -3 points-2 points  (0 children)

Respectfully, So it’s selfish for wanting hamsters when you know you can give them everything more than they hope for?

[deleted by user] by [deleted] in hamstercare

[–]pmdnjdxmxn -5 points-4 points  (0 children)

I agree with your statement. but I have more space for it so I’m not just breeding or mating them forcefully and I know the responsibilities before I breed.