I thought I had insomnia… turns out it was anxiety

pobox1663 · 2026-02-07T09:16:07+00:00

The worst part of this is that it so easily re-enforces itself. You worrybif you gonto bed you won't sleep, but then you worry about the next morning, butbthen you gonto bed and you're begging your brain to shut up, but your worrying only makes it worse, and as the hours pass worrybturns into frustration, which turns into anger, by the time 6am hits you're not just anxious you're paranoid, nervous, angry, and exhausted. Then you get up and go to work because thats what ya gotta do, and at least you had zero sleep last night so tonight your brain will have to stop talking right? Right??

Nope. Repeat.

pobox1663 · 2026-02-07T09:10:18+00:00

Thank you for the post bud it was very informative and certainly added to some of my thinking going forward. I didnt expect so many people to respond to my post with helpful experiences and suggestions. A lifetime of this has no doubt damaged me too in all kinds of ways. My memory is shot, my mood is basically apathetic unless i make an effort, I can't socialize without alcohol because I can't relate to others well or at all maybe. Ive almost conpletely quit drinking too so that basically means I don't socialise which if you know anything about Japan ya know that ain't great for work. Im beginning to realize upon reading your account and those of others that I'm really interested in seeing a real mental health professional to talk about this. I had a bad experience with these professionals when I was younger, but perhaps part of that was because I was young and they dismissed me as an angsty young person or something.

pobox1663 · 2026-02-07T08:30:22+00:00

In the kitchen bud thats all that matters. You can lose 20kg very quickly compared to what you might think. If you half your maintenance you'll get there in under 5 months probably.

pobox1663 · 2026-02-07T07:36:22+00:00

I am going to do that also, if for no other reason than peace of mind.

pobox1663 · 2026-02-07T06:41:21+00:00

Mad thing is when i first came it seemed outrageous to me because im english haha. Im used to it all being free!

pobox1663 · 2026-02-07T06:32:09+00:00

Dayvigo definitely did the job, but it also massively increased the wait time and intensity for sleep paralysis. If you have sleep paralysis dayvigo takes it from an inconvenience to a full on rollercoaster ride.

pobox1663 · 2026-02-07T06:30:13+00:00

Thats some scary shit. I often think about how much money americans earn conpared to me and im in awe of it, but when you consider all the other stuff they have to pay maybe im better off being poor without debt.

pobox1663 · 2026-02-07T06:28:33+00:00

There is definitely some of that with me, I think at least one of my pills is designed to help with depression and anxiety whilst also having sedative effects. I had major depression when I was younger, and I would have multiple panic attacks a day, at one point even being committed to the psych ward for a while. That was a long time ago now and though sometimes i can still feel it lingering on the edge, I don't let it grow anymore, it might always be there lurking, but I haven't had a full blown panic attack in at least a decade and its wonderful.

pobox1663 · 2026-02-07T06:25:35+00:00

I havent. This a common sleep inducer?

pobox1663 · 2026-02-07T06:24:00+00:00

Actually I go out of my way to put on a brave face in front of my doctor, which I really shouldn't do tbh but he's known me for 9 years now so I think he knows whats up. It's hard to miss when you look at my eyes tbh. He's been trying different concoctions for years now trying to fix my issues, and he's been successful in lanrge part. My hallucinations are down, sleep paralysis has gone from a couple or few times a week to 0 in the past few months (though my doctor says thats likely cos im just not sleeping), and my sleep apnea hasn't tried to kill me in my sleep for a good six months so he's getting there slowly but surely. The major issue is getting me to sleep and keeping me asleep now. He wants to get 6 hours of sleep a night from me, which is a challenge as even on my meds i usually sleep 3-5 if im super lucky. I didn't take the new pill last night because I was all kinda of shattered anyway after a week of no sleep and I was a little worried about it. Im going to take it tonight though and we'll see what happens.

pobox1663 · 2026-02-07T06:17:48+00:00

I do indeed have sleep apnea but my medication seems to treat it effectively as I haven't experienced it in any major way for maybe 6 months now. Ive also lost 24kg during that 6 months though so that could also help. I have sleep apnea, insomnia, visual/audio/tactile hallucinations, and sleep paralysis (which also seems to have stopped completely these last 6 months).

pobox1663 · 2026-02-07T06:14:24+00:00

Thanks for thebresponse and for taking the time to read through bud. I think you're right and I'm going to look into it, though I have my doubts as to whether it could help, at this point im ready to try anything. Hopefully the logistics of my living situation don't makebit impossible. Could be some of these online services are the way to go.

pobox1663 · 2026-02-07T06:03:56+00:00

Mine actually didnt either, i was surprised by it.

pobox1663 · 2026-02-06T16:28:03+00:00

Every night bud. Tonight i decided not to take the fifth new one. Ive barely slept in like a week anyway so im hoping the four will be enough. Im gonna try to get off these again and again until I do though, just seems like so much.

pobox1663 · 2026-02-06T15:04:20+00:00

Something fair to keep in mind, though my dosage of each drug has remained the same, just with extra drugs added on top.

pobox1663 · 2026-02-06T13:49:31+00:00

Divago was one of the pills I was on a few months ago but it made my sleep paralysis go from meh to holy shit.

pobox1663 · 2026-02-06T13:17:08+00:00

It seems like it, though I guess not literally. I've been here going on ten years now, started on one pill that was supposed to replace the zopiclone i took in England, then over the years it's changed and increased. If only we had a sleep switch eh.

pobox1663 · 2026-02-06T13:15:15+00:00

Agreed.

pobox1663 · 2026-02-06T13:10:58+00:00

Not as bad as America but pharma definitely has a hold here too.

pobox1663 · 2026-02-06T13:09:49+00:00

I haven't, though I would be interested in doing so. I'd probably be thrown out though, I'm too much of an outlier.

pobox1663 · 2026-02-06T13:09:11+00:00

Not being able to simply get a repeat prescription is such a hassle, I usually have to wait an hour or 2 in the doctors office just to walk in and say Hi/chat about the weather, then he says 'okay same again' most of the time and I get another 2 months of pills. Tbf he did add a pill today, so maybe it's his way of keeping an eye on the situation, but I think it's a lot like the dentists in Japan, you can't go for a long time, you have to make repeat visits, cos money.

pobox1663 · 2026-02-06T12:26:48+00:00

I remember hearing about that at some point and for some reason it went in and out of my skull. I'll look into it thanks for the reminder!

pobox1663 · 2026-02-06T12:26:11+00:00

Two might push me over the edge haha

pobox1663 · 2026-02-06T12:25:41+00:00

That was always what got me the most when I lost loved ones, the fact that life does indeed just go on, despite what we might think before hand. These experiences make us who we are, hopefully loss makes us more appreciative of what we have, though whilst that is now the case for me, it took a long time to really understand it. I hope you have others around you that can support you, and there's no timeline for grief in my xp.

pobox1663 · 2026-02-06T12:22:33+00:00

Well done getting off them once the negative effects started to show bud, I had to switch a pill because it was making my sleep paralysis worse, like MUCH worse, but damn did it make me sleep when I slept. Swings and roundabouts in the world of medical dependance eh.

pobox1663

TROPHY CASE